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Some days I want to run away! I am wondering if I am alone on this

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 33 Replies

i have a spouse who is not the kindest. He runs a tight ship God forbid i make a mistake or something doesnt get done he will rip me to shreds and makes me feel worthless. I have a few kids and a baby so yes i do neglect some stuff. The holidays were the worst this year.  I spent my days getting screamed at for not doing this or that. i realize now i made a huge mistake in choosing a spouse. I have went through a severe depression years ago and i feel like im falling into it again. 

I feel like a failure at work, home, as a mother, a wife and every role. i just walk around and feel so dumb and incompetent. i know a majority of my issue is my spouse reminding me every minute how im a failure.

For example. We have many holidays at my home, Christmas is especially hard as its my busy season at work. i need to add i work with my spouse too. Im overwhelmed and when i make mistakes or cant catch up it becomes me getting scolded. I wanted a partner to say hey you seem like your falling behind where can i help. instead I am told your a lazy dumb bit*h, everyone else gets their stuff done but you. I got stuck with a dummy, this is what my husband says. I work i bring home money and you do nothing at all. Meanwhile I say thats not true i work with you and he says you dont do nearly as much as i do, so i say well why am i there? 

heres my life in a sum up

My spouse screams at me and tells me how everyone else cleans, works, cooks dinner and keeps up with laundry.

My kids are annoying and do not listen to me at all. im always screaming at them (i treat them like my husband treats me) i just cant do it anymore.

I go to work and feel like i fail when he reminds me of whats not done, but in my defense im spread thin all over. i go to work and i feel like im drowning, i go home and im being swallowed by laundry. Im not sure if this is a normal feeling for most women. I just feel like i want to give up and pack my bags and take a one way plane ticket to tahiti or something and never return. I feel like that more and more everyday. I look at my kids faces and i just dont have the guts to do it.

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 3, 2018 at 3:54 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 3, 2018 at 4:05 PM
3 moms liked this

 You need to stand up for yourself. Tell him to fuck off. Then get yourself together and divorce his abusive ass.

LuvHugs429
by Gold Member on Jan. 3, 2018 at 4:08 PM
1 mom liked this

This is a way different post then I thought it would be. There have been times I have wanted to run away and just be by myself but it's not for any of those reasons.


StonesGirl66
by Alexandra on Jan. 3, 2018 at 4:11 PM
Why are you putting up with this asshole? You didn't mention it. With all the kids you have, did you realize that you can get him to leave the home?
Katie6586
by Bronze Member on Jan. 3, 2018 at 4:13 PM

Your DH sounds abusive. You deserve better!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 3, 2018 at 4:16 PM

Hmm, I will be watching and hoping someone with a SN admits to this too....

brime98
by Ruby Member on Jan. 3, 2018 at 4:16 PM
Get your shit together and get out.
Keep in mind being a single parent is more work kid and house wise than doing it with someone so you may want to figure out a plan to keep ahead. I'm sure there are planning apps.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jan. 3, 2018 at 4:19 PM
Your husband is abusive. Feeling overwhelmed is normal sometimes, but what you are living is abuse. It is not normal for spouses to treat eachother that way. It likely will be difficult to get out of this situation, but in the long run, it would be so much better for you and your children. Do you have any outside support? This is not normal or okay, and you and your children deserve better.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 3, 2018 at 4:20 PM

thank you all. i knew everyone's answer would be to leave but its just not that easy. years of abuse, i just dont have it in me. im damaged.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Jan. 3, 2018 at 4:21 PM

You are married to an abusive asshole. Time to take your kids and get the fuck out of that shithole. You, and they, deserve much better than this controlling jerk.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 3, 2018 at 4:21 PM

i know and i agree your right. Its just so hard to pick up and leave. He will not leave he has warned me that will not happen. He said he would throw me out.

Quoting Anonymous 4: Your husband is abusive. Feeling overwhelmed is normal sometimes, but what you are living is abuse. It is not normal for spouses to treat eachother that way. It likely will be difficult to get out of this situation, but in the long run, it would be so much better for you and your children. Do you have any outside support? This is not normal or okay, and you and your children deserve better.


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