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Feeling restless

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 20 Replies
My exhusband was active duty military when we were married. I basically spent 15 years moving every 2 years, 3 at the most. We never settled anywhere, but experienced life in so many different places. I always thought I was tired of it and wanted to settle down and put down roots. When I moved here to live with ny SO after my divorce, I planned for this to be my "forever home ". We would put down roots, my kids could make friends and keep them, have stability and we would make this our "home town".

We have been here 4 years. The kids are doing well in school. My oldest is a senior in high school. I have a decent job. My SO has a GREAT job. We are comfortable and settled.

The issue? I find myself feeling very restless. I have been here for almost 4 years. It is no longer new and interesting. Every day seems very "same old same old". I feel like it's time for us to try somewhere new. I always thought once I found the RIGHT place to stay forever I would know it. This place just doesn't quite feel like THAT place.

My SO knows how I have been feeling and he has been putting out feelers for jobs in different places. So far a few nibblea but no bites. If he does find the right job somewhere interesting, we will be moving. We haven't told his kids' Mom or his parents yet because it's still an "if" but they will NOT be happy if we do move. His kids are long distance so it will not affect his custody/visitation situation at all but it will mean that his kids will no longer be close to his parents when they visit.

SO found a lead last night for a job he is more than qualified for in northern CA. My fingers are crossed this one works. Right, now, we live in a small midwestern town. That would be such a different experience. I really think it's time we have an adventure.

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 18, 2018 at 10:34 AM
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Replies (1-10):
MixedCooke
by Ruby Member on Jan. 18, 2018 at 10:39 AM
Isn’t that where the wildfires and mudslides occurred??
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 18, 2018 at 10:42 AM

I don't know if I'd be comfortable uprooting the kids. Especially during senior year and when they're all doing so well. I know it's not their decision but I'd have been devastated if my parents did that to me for no reason other than boredom. I know everyone is different though.  I despise moving and change. Idk, I'd see what the rest of the family thinks. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 18, 2018 at 10:42 AM
I'd just go on vacation. I moved around a lot like that as a child, never getting to make and keep friends bc I knew in a short time, we'd pick up and go again. It's caused a lot of issues for me but at least you could've used military as your excuse.

I promised myself that I wouldn't move when ds started school and so far, he's only had to change schools once- from elementary to literally next door for middle school. Seeing that it's your oldest's last year, I hope you wait until she graduates at least.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 18, 2018 at 10:43 AM
And? Everywhere has disasters sometimes.

Quoting MixedCooke: Isn’t that where the wildfires and mudslides occurred??
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 18, 2018 at 10:47 AM
We wouldn't move until after my oldest graduates in May. My other kids are both in middle school so it isnt as important to stay. I am the opposite. I love change. Things get very stagnant when they stay the same for too long.

Quoting Anonymous 2:

I don't know if I'd be comfortable uprooting the kids. Especially during senior year and when they're all doing so well. I know it's not their decision but I'd have been devastated if my parents did that to me for no reason other than boredom. I know everyone is different though.  I despise moving and change. Idk, I'd see what the rest of the family thinks. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 18, 2018 at 10:48 AM
We would not move until after she graduates in May.

Quoting Anonymous 3: I'd just go on vacation. I moved around a lot like that as a child, never getting to make and keep friends bc I knew in a short time, we'd pick up and go again. It's caused a lot of issues for me but at least you could've used military as your excuse.

I promised myself that I wouldn't move when ds started school and so far, he's only had to change schools once- from elementary to literally next door for middle school. Seeing that it's your oldest's last year, I hope you wait until she graduates at least.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jan. 18, 2018 at 11:01 AM
Do your kids a favor and stay put.
lacyd75_anew
by Silver Member on Jan. 18, 2018 at 11:02 AM
I'd be inclined to stay put at least until the kids are graduated and all. But that's just me. We have moved a lot. And when we thought we may have to move again here recently my DD said she really really didn't want to. She said it's gets harder the older she is getting. She is in 7th now. She just wants to go to school and play soccer with the friends and whatnot she has now. And i get it. It was same way for me when I was growing up and we would move a lot. I mean if it turned we had no other choice we would move but we are trying to just do whatever to stay put mainly for her. Plus I'm sick of packing and unpacking lol.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 18, 2018 at 11:06 AM
My kids are on board. We wouldn't move until after my oldest graduates. The other kids are in 7th and 8th grade and they are both ok with moving again. Its what they are used to and they feel tge same way I do.

Quoting lacyd75_anew: I'd be inclined to stay put at least until the kids are graduated and all. But that's just me. We have moved a lot. And when we thought we may have to move again here recently my DD said she really really didn't want to. She said it's gets harder the older she is getting. She is in 7th now. She just wants to go to school and play soccer with the friends and whatnot she has now. And i get it. It was same way for me when I was growing up and we would move a lot. I mean if it turned we had no other choice we would move but we are trying to just do whatever to stay put mainly for her. Plus I'm sick of packing and unpacking lol.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 18, 2018 at 11:06 AM
They enjoy change just as much as I do.

Quoting Anonymous 4: Do your kids a favor and stay put.
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