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Funny stories

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 12 Replies
funny kid/mom stories

Go!
Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 23, 2018 at 10:26 AM
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Replies (1-10):
redneckmama4
by Loree on Jan. 23, 2018 at 10:27 AM
Too many stories, I need to write a book lol.

Good luck! Bump!
Danesmommy1
by Grammar Enthusiast on Jan. 23, 2018 at 11:04 AM
1 mom liked this
I took DS to the ER because he had to pee! ๐Ÿ˜‘๐Ÿ˜‘๐Ÿ˜‘

He woke up his first night with no pull-up completely dry. Potty training was a success and I rocked! Yay, me!!

Then DS says his penis hurts and I asked him to potty, but he says he didn't have to. This begins to escalate and soon he's hysterical, yelling his winkie hurts but he insists he doesn't have to pee.

I'm freaking out, I call DH and he doesn't know what the hell either so I take him to the ER. DS is red, crying hysterically and I'm feeling like a pervert talking to the staff about a toddler's penis. Are they going to call CPS on me? I don't know!

So we get a room and DS finally exhausts himself and falls asleep. The second he's out, his body relaxes and the floodgates open. He's drenched, I'm drenched, we're all drenched in pee.

So yeah, that was fun and yes, I'm an idiot. That's my ridiculous, new-ish mom story.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 23, 2018 at 11:11 AM
1 mom liked this
Thatโ€™s AMAZING!

Quoting Danesmommy1: I took DS to the ER because he had to pee! ๐Ÿ˜‘๐Ÿ˜‘๐Ÿ˜‘

He woke up his first night with no pull-up completely dry. Potty training was a success and I rocked! Yay, me!!

Then DS days his penis hurts and I asked him to potty, but he says he didn't have to. This begins to escalate and soon and he's hysterical, yelling his winkie hurts but he insists he doesn't have to pee.

I'm freaking out, I call DH and he doesn't know what the hell either so I take him to the ER. DS is red, crying hysterically and I'm feeling like a pervert talking to the staff about a toddler's penis. Are they going to call CPS on me? I don't know!

So we get a room and DS finally exhausts himself and falls asleep. The second he's out, his body relaxes and the floodgates open. He's drenched, I'm drenched, we're all drenched in pee.

So yeah, that was fun and yes, I'm an idiot. So that's my ridiculous, new-ish mom story.
Gardeningmom4
by Emerald Member on Jan. 23, 2018 at 11:14 AM

Well when my middle dd was about 4 we were walking down our driveway which dips down and collects water and frogs lay eggs there. They had some tadpoles and we were looking at them and she looks at me and goes "Aren't they cute as a bug." I would always tell her she was cute as a button but I guess she heard me say bug. LOL

Gardeningmom4
by Emerald Member on Jan. 23, 2018 at 11:17 AM
1 mom liked this

Oh my. My brother talked me into letting my oldest air out for awhile since she looked like she was getting a rash and she was laying across my legs while I rubbed her back and she peed on me. LOL.

Quoting Danesmommy1: I took DS to the ER because he had to pee! ๐Ÿ˜‘๐Ÿ˜‘๐Ÿ˜‘ He woke up his first night with no pull-up completely dry. Potty training was a success and I rocked! Yay, me!! Then DS days his penis hurts and I asked him to potty, but he says he didn't have to. This begins to escalate and soon and he's hysterical, yelling his winkie hurts but he insists he doesn't have to pee. I'm freaking out, I call DH and he doesn't know what the hell either so I take him to the ER. DS is red, crying hysterically and I'm feeling like a pervert talking to the staff about a toddler's penis. Are they going to call CPS on me? I don't know! So we get a room and DS finally exhausts himself and falls asleep. The second he's out, his body relaxes and the floodgates open. He's drenched, I'm drenched, we're all drenched in pee. So yeah, that was fun and yes, I'm an idiot. So that's my ridiculous, new-ish mom story.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 23, 2018 at 11:24 AM

My youngest son tricked us into thinking he needed glasses, because he liked the way he looked with them, and ended up needing glasses for real because he messed his eyes up so much doing it. 

His best friend in middle school had a spare pair, and after they expired she let him have them. He wore them every day at school without our knowledge. And they he came home and would complain of headaches, would run into stuff, would stare at something for a really long time like he was trying to read it. He was sooo sneaky about it. He never said "I'm trying to read that" or "I didn't see it" he just acted embarrassed and let us  come to the conclusion that his ass was going blind. We took him to the eye doctor and it was going fine, and then during the slides he was like "wait I really can't see that" and started getting all concerned.

That's what you get, child!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 23, 2018 at 11:31 AM
I was in publix with my sister and my 2 kids. We got in line to wait for subs, and there is a guy in front of us that looks a lot like my dh's best friend that my kids adore.

My ds was 3 at the time and generally a good listener. But this time....my ds sees the man and is like mom it's devin! And I'm trying to convince him it isn't, but before I could stop him he just about flings himself at this man, like arms wrapped around this guys legs hugging him and saying he has missed him.

I get ds pried off this man, apologizing the whole time. And my ds is yelling that I'm being mean and he just wants to say hi... the guy was super nice about it, and in ds's defense, he really looked SO much like dh's friend...but man it was embarrassing.
CotterpinDoozer
by Platinum Member on Jan. 23, 2018 at 11:36 AM
2 moms liked this

Just last week, I slipped on a rogue ice cube and landed hard on my back. As I lay there doing that half laugh half cry thing, my three year old leaned over me and disapprovingly asked "were you running?" 

Gardeningmom4
by Emerald Member on Jan. 23, 2018 at 11:44 AM

Well were you? LOL

Quoting CotterpinDoozer:

Just last week, I slipped on a rogue ice cube and landed hard on my back. As I lay there doing that half laugh half cry thing, my three year old leaned over me and disapprovingly asked "were you running?" 


mrsmom110
by NO on Jan. 23, 2018 at 11:52 AM
1 mom liked this

My husb and I had the boys with us when we went bed shopping.  Youngest boy announces loudly to the salesperson that "mommy & __ (Husb's name) broke the bed".  I wanted to crawl under the nearest display model!  lol ;p

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