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My DD intentionally got pregnant-updated

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 140 Replies
I'm furious! She is 16, turning 17 in March and is 21 weeks pregnant. I overheard her telling a friend that she was surprised how quickly it happened! When I tried to talk to her about it later, she shrugged and said "it already happened, who cares how?"

I've failed as a mother.

Update: she had her birthday and is almost 29 weeks now. She is MISERABLE... She developed gestational diabetes and she's pissed about that. All she got for her birthday was baby stuff from me and an iTunes giftcard for $25. She's starting to get really cranky. The next 11 weeks are going to be hard as hell on her and then the real work starts.
Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 29, 2018 at 11:43 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 29, 2018 at 11:46 AM

Yup.

brime98
by Ruby Member on Jan. 29, 2018 at 11:47 AM
Teenagers are ridiculous.
Does she plan on keeping it?
The-Nerd
by Silver Member on Jan. 29, 2018 at 11:48 AM
Idk if I would say you failed as a parent but you did allow her too much freedom that's for sure
engagedandproud
by Diamond Member on Jan. 29, 2018 at 11:48 AM
6 moms liked this
You didn't fail. You cannot control what she does
engagedandproud
by Diamond Member on Jan. 29, 2018 at 11:49 AM
4 moms liked this
You don't need that much freedom to get knocked up

Quoting The-Nerd: Idk if I would say you failed as a parent but you did allow her too much freedom that's for sure
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 29, 2018 at 11:49 AM
4 moms liked this
I hope you make her take care of it all on her own. She wanted it, she needs to take care of it.
The-Nerd
by Silver Member on Jan. 29, 2018 at 11:50 AM
Apparently she had enough to be alone with a boy!

Quoting engagedandproud: You don't need that much freedom to get knocked up

Quoting The-Nerd: Idk if I would say you failed as a parent but you did allow her too much freedom that's for sure
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jan. 29, 2018 at 11:51 AM

No you havent failed. Your mothering is only just begining. Now she needs to get a job, finish highschool, start college and provide for a baby while doing it all.  Congratulations and im sorry :(


Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Jan. 29, 2018 at 11:53 AM
4 moms liked this

First off, you didn't fail as a mother so get that thought out of your mind. 

You can do your best to raise kids to wait/use birth control...whatever and sometimes they still defy you and end up in this kind of situation. I'm sorry that your daughter made some bad decisions. It's painful when kids don't listen but remembering back to age 16, I thought that I knew it all too back then. At 48 I realize that I still learn something new every day. 

It's normal for you to feel angry about this and I would also be furious with my DD if she became pregnant because I've also talked about birth control and waiting! 

Her apparent cavalier attitude is either because she really doesn't understand the full implications of the situation yet or maybe she is putting on a front to cover up being scared. 

Unfortunately it has already happened as she is pretty far along now so the best thing to do is make sure that she gets good prenatal care and try to support her. Try talking with her about the pregnancy and how she is feeling, about your experiences, etc. Then you can talk with her about plans on raising the baby or adoption.

If you were a failure, you would not have cared enough to post here and worry about her. 

Good luck to you.

ranchmama21
by Gold Member on Jan. 29, 2018 at 11:54 AM
3 moms liked this
She made her choice and in for a reality check when up all night, no sleep with school, job and homework.

I would make her a big sign that says "welcome to adult and parenthood. A choice you made" everytime she whines about no friends, over tired, broke, and no time to herself.
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