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I'm sorry you are jealous but I'm not going to put up with your nonsense!

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
With sil has a 4 month old baby. Her and her dh spent 9 years which included several miscarriages and a lot of expense of infertility treatments in order to have their son. They originally planned for her to be a stay-at-home mom until their child went to kindergarten. However because of how much that they had to go into for their fertility treatments and all the medical expensive she had from the pregnancy which was extremely high risk, she had to go back to work at 8 weeks post partum. I definitely understand why this is hard for her but she has been a real b**** to me lately. I think part of it is the fact that I get to be a stay-at-home mom with my five children, one of whom is a month younger than hers ( don't get me started on how pissed she was when she found out that I was also pregnant). The other part is that she asked if I would babysit her baby for free 3 days a week. She said if I could do that she would be able to avoid her $200 a week daycare cost and they could afford for her to work just 3 days a week instead of 5. I told her I couldn't do it. Like I said at that point I was about to have my fifth child and adding a 6 3 days a week two of them would be infants was just too much. And to do it for free, I just wasn't interested. So in her mind it's my fault that she has to work 5 days a week instead of 3.

She has started making nasty comments to me lately, both in person and on fb. She will post under comments and pictures of me doing fun stuff with my kids during the day with things like "must be nice to have nothing to do all day". The other day we were at my mother-in-law's house I was talking to my mother-in-law about stuff I was doing with the kids. All the sudden she blows up and says that I need to stop bragging and that I should be ashamed to myself. That I wouldn't even help her knowing that it would mean more time with her child after she spent nearly a decade trying to become a mother. She said now 5 days a week she comes home from work and only has like an hour with her baby before it's time for bed. So she doesn't want to hear about how I get to do stuff with my kids. She was yelling and calling all sorts of names. Finally I told my mother-in-law thank you for having us but we need to leave. I told my sister-in-law that I'm sorry she's clearly jealous of the life that I have but she needs to work that out on her own but I'm not going to be around her until she can get her jealousy under control.

We left. My husband hadn't even gotten there yet as he was coming straight from work. My mother-in-law called me saying that it's not fair for me to take the grandkids away that they were looking forward to spending time with them. I said I'm sorry but I'm not dealing with her nonsense. She called my husband complaining the same way he said the same thing. He said that until sister-in-law can get her jealousy under control don't expect us to be anywhere that she is. And when we host things she will not be invited
Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 9, 2018 at 10:56 AM
Replies (41-50):
ilovemykids323
by on Feb. 9, 2018 at 11:44 AM
2 moms liked this

yeah i wouldn't be around her for awhile... dont need that kind of negativity... and i'd block her from thigns on facebook.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 15 on Feb. 9, 2018 at 11:44 AM
Your response to OP is STUPID STUPID all around. Go back under your bridge, Little Troll!

Quoting Anonymous 1: I mean honestly why does anybody post on Mom confessions? Usually it's to be able to get something off your chest without discussing it with people in your actual life. I'm not sure how I sound Petty for not wanting to babysit her kids 3 days a week for five and a half years for free or deal with her being nasty to me because I won't do so

Quoting raseco:

why the hell did you post this? it's just stupid stupid all around. you sound petty and she sounds jealous and this sounds stupid. did you just want a bunch of people patting you on the pat saying there there, you're so right? who cares?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Feb. 9, 2018 at 11:45 AM
That's what I want to know. There's nothing awful about not being able to do more than what is your responsibility. My children are my responsibility. No one else's children are my responsibility

Quoting Anonymous 7:

What is awful about OP setting a clear and healthy boundary on her time with her sister in law? She has FIVE children and one is just a few months old!! That's certainly enough to keep anyone busy, I know I would have a tough time juggling all of that!

Quoting Anonymous 3: You both sound awful but I feel badly for her.

msjaxon
by Platinum Member on Feb. 9, 2018 at 11:45 AM
1 mom liked this
I can't argue with this..I'm TTC and the TTC boards are full of the worst humans on the planet πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ from thr long term folks trying. Entitled and bitter...


Quoting cellomom26: No surprise, the infertile women I've met are the nastiest humans on the planet. Their sense of entitlement is shocking.

Free child care? Hahaha!!!
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Feb. 9, 2018 at 11:45 AM
1 mom liked this
I disagree. The SIL attitude is for her and her dh to deal with. They NEEDED a baby so bad and now can't afford childcare?

Quoting msjaxon: Naw.. She has a bad attitude attached. Her feelings are justified and maybe it's how she has expressed them but she doesn't come across as sympathetic.

Quoting Anonymous 5: False.

Op has her own children to care for. She has an infant of her own. The SIL crisis isn't the Ops emergency.

Quoting Anonymous 2:

Yeah, she should not be taking it out on you but basically you're saying you won't help out 3 days a week because you've decided to be a baby machine.  Your entire attitude is off putting and you don't look any better than your SIL at this point.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 16 on Feb. 9, 2018 at 11:47 AM

I don’t think SIL wants to be around you anyway.

Talkingheads
by Emerald Member on Feb. 9, 2018 at 11:47 AM
2 moms liked this
Wtf... Her body and her choice what to do with it. The state of her Uteris has nothing to do with Sil's inability to fund a stay at home lifestyle. It's Sil's responsibility to pay for the child she wanted so badly. No one else.

Quoting Anonymous 2:

Yeah, she should not be taking it out on you but basically you're saying you won't help out 3 days a week because you've decided to be a baby machine.  Your entire attitude is off putting and you don't look any better than your SIL at this point.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 17 on Feb. 9, 2018 at 11:48 AM

I was with you until the end when you decided to call your sil jealous. You would've left that part out. 

redheadtmk
by Ruby Member on Feb. 9, 2018 at 11:49 AM
2 moms liked this
These women who think you are petty and selfish should fund her life so she can stay home.

There is a difference between family helping family when they can and family being total martyrs who never say no even if it's a ginormous inconvenience and makes them struggle.

I would not put up with her bitchy behavior either. There is zero reason for that disrespect.
msjaxon
by Platinum Member on Feb. 9, 2018 at 11:50 AM
I like the way you stated this. I was having a hard time getting out how OP is not wrong BUT isn't right either.

Quoting Anonymous 3: I think the way OP is describing her SIL is awful.
She is not 1 bit compassionate to that womans situation.

Fertility issues are hard- yet this woman has no compassion for the financial or emotional drain put on her brothers family.

The idea that she couldnt find any time to help. Not offering an afternoon, not a morning, nothing so that her brothers family could get out from their financial burden or that a new mom could spend a few hours w/ her newborn.

As a SAHM I have a lot of sympathy for people who want kids and cant have them.
I have a lot of sympathy for those that struggle financially.
I have a lot of sympathy for moms who have to leave their neeborns to work.

Id ask IF the shoe was on the other foot, how would OP be?
Cause she sounds rude and heartless.

Quoting Anonymous 7:

What is awful about OP setting a clear and healthy boundary on her time with her sister in law? She has FIVE children and one is just a few months old!! That's certainly enough to keep anyone busy, I know I would have a tough time juggling all of that!

Quoting Anonymous 3: You both sound awful but I feel badly for her.

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