Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Why are SAHM'S shunned?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

Seriously, why is it wrong to want this type of life?

Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 9, 2018 at 2:25 PM
Replies (131-140):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 31 on Feb. 9, 2018 at 4:27 PM

No reason t get so wound up.   Providing child care for other children inyour home is a job/career.  You have to get a license, have cpr/first aid training, pay taxes, have contracts, etc....   With your own kids, you can do whatever you want, when you want...that isn't the same for in home child care providers.

Anon 9 is just saying she doesn't understand any person, woman or man, who is content to be at home doing nothing all day while the kids are in school.    I know many SAHM who never get out of their PJs all day, who watch Tv or surf the next until their kids come home.  Honestly, what type of life is that?  There is an amazing interesting world out there. She just doestn' get those people who don't want to be engaged in the world outside of their home.  It isn't that hard to understand.

Quoting Anonymous 27: Lol! So they are “work at home Mom’s”, because they care for other people’s kids. Caring for just their own kids makes them people who do not work, because you don’t consider that working. That is funny that you think there is a difference between caring for other people’s kids and caring for your own, as far as, one being work and one not work. There is no logic in your thinking. As far as lazy SAHMs, there are also lazy working Moms. Some jobs away from home are not that hard, and some people do not do their jobs away from home well. Why not disrespect all lazy people instead of making the distinction that you judge lazy SAHMs?
Quoting Anonymous 9:

There is a difference between a SAHM and a WAHM.  I use a WAHM for my childcare.  And no, I do not judge her.  Nor do I judge every SAHM.  I judge the lazy SAHMs.

Quoting Anonymous 27: Do you look down on the people who provide “loving homes” for your kids while you are at work? If not, why are you judging people the take care of their own kids in loving homes both day and night?
Quoting Anonymous 9:

A manage a laboratory for a large volume pharmaceutical company.  And I do it well.  But I also chose to educate myself prior to having my 3 children.  Based on my income, I was able to spend time with them after they were born and they moved in to loving homes during the day while I am working.

Quoting Anonymous 22: What do you do for a career?
Quoting Anonymous 9:

In my opinion, I feel like they are wasting their lives.  Especially when they're sitting at home after their kids are in school.  Wouldn't you want better for yourself than to just be a housekeeper, cooker, and taxi driver?  I do.  And that's why I work.  Because I have made something of myself.

Quoting Anonymous 1:

Staying home is the norm in my small town. Shute even when the kids are gone the women still stay home, do whatever they want. However I see it all the time here, like women are wasting their lives by being a sahm.

Quoting Anonymous 5: This is the only place where it's an issue. Both of our families were proud that I wanted to stay home. Staying at home is the norm in my area.






Anonymous
by Anonymous 20 on Feb. 9, 2018 at 4:30 PM
1 mom liked this
Anon9 is a judgemental asshat, and for someone with such an important job sure does seem to be wasting a lot of time judging us poor, worthless SAHM's on her companies dime.

Quoting Anonymous 31:

No reason t get so wound up.   Providing child care for other children inyour home is a job/career.  You have to get a license, have cpr/first aid training, pay taxes, have contracts, etc....   With your own kids, you can do whatever you want, when you want...that isn't the same for in home child care providers.

Anon 9 is just saying she doesn't understand any person, woman or man, who is content to be at home doing nothing all day while the kids are in school.    I know many SAHM who never get out of their PJs all day, who watch Tv or surf the next until their kids come home.  Honestly, what type of life is that?  There is an amazing interesting world out there. She just doestn' get those people who don't want to be engaged in the world outside of their home.  It isn't that hard to understand.

Quoting Anonymous 27: Lol! So they are �work at home Mom�s�, because they care for other people�s kids. Caring for just their own kids makes them people who do not work, because you don�t consider that working. That is funny that you think there is a difference between caring for other people�s kids and caring for your own, as far as, one being work and one not work. There is no logic in your thinking.



As far as lazy SAHMs, there are also lazy working Moms. Some jobs away from home are not that hard, and some people do not do their jobs away from home well. Why not disrespect all lazy people instead of making the distinction that you judge lazy SAHMs?



Quoting Anonymous 9:

There is a difference between a SAHM and a WAHM.  I use a WAHM for my childcare.  And no, I do not judge her.  Nor do I judge every SAHM.  I judge the lazy SAHMs.

Quoting Anonymous 27: Do you look down on the people who provide �loving homes� for your kids while you are at work? If not, why are you judging people the take care of their own kids in loving homes both day and night?



Quoting Anonymous 9:

A manage a laboratory for a large volume pharmaceutical company.  And I do it well.  But I also chose to educate myself prior to having my 3 children.  Based on my income, I was able to spend time with them after they were born and they moved in to loving homes during the day while I am working.

Quoting Anonymous 22: What do you do for a career?



Quoting Anonymous 9:

In my opinion, I feel like they are wasting their lives.  Especially when they're sitting at home after their kids are in school.  Wouldn't you want better for yourself than to just be a housekeeper, cooker, and taxi driver?  I do.  And that's why I work.  Because I have made something of myself.

Quoting Anonymous 1:

Staying home is the norm in my small town. Shute even when the kids are gone the women still stay home, do whatever they want. However I see it all the time here, like women are wasting their lives by being a sahm.

Quoting Anonymous 5: This is the only place where it's an issue. Both of our families were proud that I wanted to stay home. Staying at home is the norm in my area.

ReedusStalker
by 11-15/3-27 on Feb. 9, 2018 at 4:31 PM
I dont feel shunned.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 32 on Feb. 9, 2018 at 4:31 PM
1 mom liked this

Some working moms just don't relate or understand why one would stay home instead of working I think. The working moms that can't handle being a SAHM and find it boring and depressing. Because it didn't work for them they think every mom is the same. They feel its not real work. They are jealous. Some think its not wise and is foolish because you are relying on another human being that can decide to leave you (or die) and you don't have the money or work experience to get a good job to support yourself and your kids.

I really have no idea. Just a few examples I have heard. I have been a SAHM for the past 15 years and have never had anybody say anything mean or negative to me about it, EXCEPT on cafemom of course lol. 

Phoenix_lament
by Fawkes on Feb. 9, 2018 at 4:31 PM


Quoting Anonymous 2:

Nothing is wrong with it. 

I wouldn't do it. but nothing is wrong with it. 

Why is being a single mom shunned?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 33 on Feb. 9, 2018 at 4:34 PM
What really gets people's judgment juices flowing is the sahm with teenagers. That truly boggles the minds of general public .
PacMan80
by Ruby Member on Feb. 9, 2018 at 4:38 PM
This site is the only place sahm's are shunned. There are many, many sahm's in my city.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 11 on Feb. 9, 2018 at 4:39 PM
Especially when some of them... Would have been more appropriate then. Sorry for the confusion, I wasn't trying to be rude at all.

Quoting Anonymous 9:

I said "especially when".  No assumption there as there are many stay at home mom's in my town that just sit at home the majority of their day.

Quoting Anonymous 11: See there's your problem, assuming that stay-at-home moms just sit in their house all day while their kids at school. I'm sure there are some, but that is not the norm, at least in my experiences.

Quoting Anonymous 9:

In my opinion, I feel like they are wasting their lives.  Especially when they're sitting at home after their kids are in school.  Wouldn't you want better for yourself than to just be a housekeeper, cooker, and taxi driver?  I do.  And that's why I work.  Because I have made something of myself.

Quoting Anonymous 1:

Staying home is the norm in my small town. Shute even when the kids are gone the women still stay home, do whatever they want. However I see it all the time here, like women are wasting their lives by being a sahm.

Quoting Anonymous 5: This is the only place where it's an issue. Both of our families were proud that I wanted to stay home. Staying at home is the norm in my area.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 30 on Feb. 9, 2018 at 4:40 PM
1 mom liked this

I am a SAHM who once worked.  I am educated but I have not worked FT since my child was born and she is now 20.  I have no regrets and feel like I am living a fulfilling life.

I have the utmost respect for any woman who works and raises a family.  I honestly don't know how they accomplish all that they do in a day!

I also respect the women who have elected to SAH.  How some of them do what they do in a day (PTA, home life, volunteer, etc.,) never ceases to amaze me.

The only bashing I have ever heard about a SAHM has either been on CM or out of the mouth of my step daughter and her mother.  The same goes for working mothers...I hear negative things said about them here on CM.

I think if women would put more energy into insuring their own happiness instead of comparing their lives to other women, there would be many more content women out there.  Come to think of it, there would probably be a whole heck of a lot less bashing going on, too!



Mom2Just1
by Platinum Member on Feb. 9, 2018 at 4:44 PM

I only ever felt judged on here.  I have been told I am lazy because I stay home with my three children. I was told last week, "Don't you have more ambitions than just staying home with your kids?"  I tend to just ignore them anyways.  I am doing what I have always wanted to do. My mom stayed home with us and I loved it. She was there after school when we got off the bus, snack waiting, etc.  

Lazy is not even in my vocab. I volunteer, makes our meals from scratch(we rarely eat out), drop off children, pick up, dr apps, I also have a food allergy child, etc.  I just always knew daycare was not an option for my children.  

Daisypath Anniversary tickersLilypie Kids Birthday tickers 

Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickersLilypie Third Birthday tickers




Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)