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Sorry. The kid is not perfect.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 29 Replies
We are having a small issue in our home. My step sons mom has led him to believe he is perfect. Now, he is a good kid but he isn’t perfect. Anytime he messes something up or it isn’t done to perfection he gets so upset. He was wiping down the counters last night and I went in a little later and noticed something sticky. I didn’t say anything just wiped it up. He walked in as I was doing it and felt like he had failed.

He told DH he feels he can’t do anything right here. We honestly don’t get on him all that much. We acknowledge that everyone makes mistakes and no one is perfect. But BM demands perfection. She makes him redo work until it is perfect. She doesn’t let him turn in an assignment that doesn’t meet her standards.

When we go to an amusement park he feels he has to help with the younger kids. He is not even the oldest and we never put that responsibility on any of them unless we let them split up. Then it’s...stay together.

I know he is stressed out. I don’t know how to help. He feels any time away from his mom makes him a failure.

DH has talked to him and we tried to get him into a counselor. But BM won’t take him and he is only with us on weekends. He made a 94 on a test and about had a panic attack.

He is 15.
Any ideas?
Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 19, 2018 at 12:12 PM
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Replies (1-10):
quinnsmom715
by Ruby Member on Feb. 19, 2018 at 12:16 PM

i feel for him.he will never be good enough..he may end up turning to drugs..

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Feb. 19, 2018 at 12:17 PM

I'm not sure what you could/should do. Maybe go for primary custody? A lot of the people on Intervention seem to have had similar bio parents and that would scare the shit out of me. 

DensHag
by Ruby Member on Feb. 19, 2018 at 12:19 PM
3 moms liked this
That poor kid needs some therapy. Any way that Dad could go back to court and get a judge to order it? At that age the boy could make a request to spend more time with Dad and then you guys could take him.

Just brainstorming here...he needs help and Mom is doing him a great disservice.
carterscutie85
by Queen Bee on Feb. 19, 2018 at 12:20 PM
2 moms liked this

If he is 15 he is old enough to let a judge know where he wants to live if you take it to court.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Feb. 19, 2018 at 12:23 PM

Um, have his dad be a dad and help his son?  It's not rocket science.  I can't imagine being married to someone so pathetic he didn't help his child when they needed him.

redheadtmk
by Ruby Member on Feb. 19, 2018 at 12:24 PM
1 mom liked this
I would just keep doing my best to help him see that it's ok to make mistakes. Do some research.....find all the famous and successful people who failed, never graduated high school or college, and all the inventions found by mistake.

Penicillin for example.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Feb. 19, 2018 at 12:36 PM
Maybe try letting him know your house you just expect him to do chores and be a kid. Has it always been this way?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Feb. 19, 2018 at 1:18 PM
He does a lot to help him. However, he can only do so much.

Quoting Anonymous 3:

Um, have his dad be a dad and help his son?  It's not rocket science.  I can't imagine being married to someone so pathetic he didn't help his child when they needed him.

PinkButterfly66
by Diamond Member on Feb. 19, 2018 at 1:21 PM
1 mom liked this

His mom needs to be sucker punched repeatedly.  That anal retentive twat is going to cause that kid to have ulcers or worse.  Dad should sue for custody for the kid's mental health sake.

GeansandZucj.
by on Feb. 19, 2018 at 1:22 PM
His father is the most important role model in his life. Being a weekend dad is not enough.
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