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Would you say anything?

Posted by on Mar. 20, 2018 at 5:10 PM
  • 55 Replies

My mom and I have a rocky relationship. Last year around this time we got back in touch after almost 5 years of no contact. One thing about me is that if you tell me or my kids you will be somewhere, be there. If you are not sure if you will come, just don't say anything... to any of us. My mom knows that DH and I go work on the other house every Sunday and some of those days we take the kids if they are not with their dad. Every single week my mom calls and asks me what time we are going over there because she wants to come and help with the work. I tell her and she says she'll see me then. Sunday rolls around and no mom. I will usually call or text her when we start cleaning up to let her know not to come because we are done for the day. Today she calls me to ask to come over, but I was out shopping. I told her I would finish up and head home. She never showed up. I called her and she didn't answer but she text me to tell me that something came up and she might see me tomorrow. I am getting annoyed at this behaviour and I have told her before that it needs to stop. Should I say something again or just let it go as a personality flaw and just deal with it?

by on Mar. 20, 2018 at 5:10 PM
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Replies (1-10):
GeansandZucj.
by on Mar. 20, 2018 at 5:18 PM
1 mom liked this
Idk Mysticboobs.. WAIT WHAT WAS THE QUESTION?
Talkingheads
by Emerald Member on Mar. 20, 2018 at 5:23 PM
Can you not read? The question is in the last sentence of the post

Quoting GeansandZucj.: Idk Mysticboobs.. WAIT WHAT WAS THE QUESTION?
Talkingheads
by Emerald Member on Mar. 20, 2018 at 5:24 PM
5 moms liked this
I would stop making plans with her. Just stop and when she asks why? Tell her you don't want to waste your time when all she is going to do is flake out again
happinessforyou
by Ruby Member on Mar. 20, 2018 at 5:25 PM
4 moms liked this

I think she was referring to the BIG BOOBS............ lol

Quoting Talkingheads: Can you not read? The question is in the last sentence of the post
Quoting GeansandZucj.: Idk Mysticboobs.. WAIT WHAT WAS THE QUESTION?


Maime13
by Platinum Member on Mar. 20, 2018 at 5:25 PM

I have zero tolerance for that level of flakiness. I wouldn't go out of my way to talk with someone like that, even if they were my Mom. If there was any relationship it'd be her showing me she was down to do some heavy lifting by going out of her way to be reliable.

happinessforyou
by Ruby Member on Mar. 20, 2018 at 5:25 PM

You know your mom, you know how flakey your mom is. And yet, the only one surprised is you..... If she shows, she shows........... if not OH WELL............

MysticLove
by Ruby Member on Mar. 20, 2018 at 5:27 PM

I stopped making plans with her. I am just getting tired of hearing hear say she'll be somewhere and never show up. In the end we don't do anything different than if she wouldn't have called at all.

Quoting Talkingheads: I would stop making plans with her. Just stop and when she asks why? Tell her you don't want to waste your time when all she is going to do is flake out again


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Mar. 20, 2018 at 5:27 PM
Deal with it. She is your mom. She seems a bit flaky Butvsge really isn’t hurting anyone.

Quoting MysticLove:

My mom and I have a rocky relationship. Last year around this time we got back in touch after almost 5 years of no contact. One thing about me is that if you tell me or my kids you will be somewhere, be there. If you are not sure if you will come, just don't say anything... to any of us. My mom knows that DH and I go work on the other house every Sunday and some of those days we take the kids if they are not with their dad. Every single week my mom calls and asks me what time we are going over there because she wants to come and help with the work. I tell her and she says she'll see me then. Sunday rolls around and no mom. I will usually call or text her when we start cleaning up to let her know not to come because we are done for the day. Today she calls me to ask to come over, but I was out shopping. I told her I would finish up and head home. She never showed up. I called her and she didn't answer but she text me to tell me that something came up and she might see me tomorrow. I am getting annoyed at this behaviour and I have told her before that it needs to stop. Should I say something again or just let it go as a personality flaw and just deal with it?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 20, 2018 at 5:27 PM
My MIL does exactly this. She’ll say she’s going to come and visit, and then always backs out. I struggled with it for years.

Finally, DH really let her know how it made us feel in no uncertain terms. When she continued to do it, we stopped trusting her and stopped including her. We haven’t seen her I 3 years because she won’t follow through.
Sassy762
by CAFE SASSY HBIC on Mar. 20, 2018 at 5:27 PM
2 moms liked this
She's a flake.....I couldnt and wouldnt deal with that BS.
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