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I am an adult with Aspergers and my grandmother is mad

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 33 Replies
I have Aspergers. I just don’t express emotions or even feel emotions as deep as many other people. I care about people and love people, but the only people I love extremely are my kids and my husband. A couple of my family members have been giving me a hard time about this lately. I don’t like to hug and kiss and the other day when I saw grandma she was irritated with me when I told her that I didn’t have time to take her somewhere that next day. She said that “you make time for those you love and you don’t love normally so you don’t make time.” I told her that I didn’t love her as much or in the same way I love my children. She said she was heartbroken. I can’t help it I feel different.
Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 21, 2018 at 10:57 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 21, 2018 at 11:01 PM
This is me. My extended family knows this and has no choice but to accept it. You've done nothing wrong. She will just have to get over it.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 21, 2018 at 11:04 PM
I am glad your family is accepting. Some of my family is, but my grandma is having a really hard time with it lately. It’s nothing new, but she seems more bothered than she used to be.

Quoting Anonymous 2: This is me. My extended family knows this and has no choice but to accept it. You've done nothing wrong. She will just have to get over it.
quinnsmom715
by Ruby Member on Mar. 21, 2018 at 11:05 PM

so,because you arent her errand girl,you dont love her?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 21, 2018 at 11:07 PM
Ummm i don’t know what to say. I feel bad for both of y’all
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Mar. 21, 2018 at 11:08 PM
Psht i love my grandma about the samw as i love my own mom. Id die for that woman if she drives me bat shit insane most days. But eh what are ya gonna do
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Mar. 21, 2018 at 11:10 PM
Were you just recently diagnosed? How have you been with her in the past?

Older people have a harder time understanding and accepting things
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 21, 2018 at 11:15 PM
No not a recent diagnosis. She always thought I was lacking empathy as a child. It has always been a problem for her. She has always thought I was weird and told me so. But lately I have been less inclined to let her hug me or kiss me anyways as I used to do. I just give all of my physical affection to my kids and don’t really have any more to offer anyone else. This has made her particularly unhappy.

Quoting Anonymous 5: Were you just recently diagnosed? How have you been with her in the past?

Older people have a harder time understanding and accepting things
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 21, 2018 at 11:15 PM
I do love her, but I can’t be what she wants me to be.

Quoting Anonymous 4: Psht i love my grandma about the samw as i love my own mom. Id die for that woman if she drives me bat shit insane most days. But eh what are ya gonna do
Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Mar. 21, 2018 at 11:15 PM
Well I think that would be very hard for her. You haven’t done anything wrong and you are just being yourself. She probably didn’t need to hear you say ‘I don’t love you as much as my kids’ though. It’s something she’s already struggling with so that would be hard to hear. That type of thing is also typical of your condition though so she should also bare that in mind. She’s probably struggling with it more now as she may feel she’s heading toward the end of her life and she’s yearning that connection with you that you can’t give her. I guess you both need to think of eachothers position.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 21, 2018 at 11:16 PM
Thanks.

I didn’t really know what to expect when I typed this out.

Quoting Anonymous 3: Ummm i don’t know what to say. I feel bad for both of y’all
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