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She wants our dad to come to the wedding and is only inviting his wife as a guest

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 230 Replies
My parents just went through a very messy divorce where my mom found out that my dad had been cheating on her for years. He begged my mom to stay with him and offer to completely cut contact with the other woman my mom refused. After that my dad moved right in with the other woman. My guess is he was never really going to cut contact. Anyway the divorce was just finalized but my sister is getting married in May. At first she wasn't going to allow my dad to bring his new wife who he married three days after the divorce was final. But my dad refused to come if she was not invited. However my sister feels that if she's invited she should be there as her dad's date. Not as anybody of importance. Therefore these are the things that she is expecting.

Stepmom is not allowed to wear the color that the mother-of-the-bride and mother-of-the-groom wear. She will also not receive a corsage.

She can either sit by herself during the ceremony or they can sit in the second row on the bride's side together. But she is not going to sit in the same row as our mother.

She's not going to be in any of the traditionally posed wedding pictures.

At the reception our dad can choose to sit at the first table on the bright side with Mom and other close family members or he can sit at another table with stepmom.

Stepmom is not allowed to be in the receiving line.

They are having a dance that is a tradition on the groom's family going back several Generations where the bride's parents the groom's parents and the new couple dance together. She realizes it's unreasonable to ask our parents to dance together but said that Dad can dance with his mother and our mom can dance with her mother. But step mom will not be a part of this.

No one from stepmoms family will be invited this includes her children two of them still live at home.

Personally I don't blame my sister on any particular point though I did advise her that if she sticks to her guns on every single one our dad may choose not to come. She is aware of that and said that she would rather him not come than concede on any of these.

I do however think it's sad because I feel like our stepmom should just realize how much damage her and my dad did and give my sister this one thing, her wedding day the way she wants it
Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 17, 2018 at 2:42 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 17, 2018 at 2:43 PM
Bump
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 17, 2018 at 2:45 PM
3 moms liked this

Sounds perfect to me.

krisnkids
by Platinum Member on Apr. 17, 2018 at 2:47 PM
23 moms liked this

Sounds like your sister has her shit together. I'd support her completely.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Apr. 17, 2018 at 2:49 PM
1 mom liked this
I don't blame her.
Talkingheads
by Emerald Member on Apr. 17, 2018 at 2:49 PM
Sounds good to me
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Apr. 17, 2018 at 2:49 PM

Those sound reasonable.its reasonable if her to invite the stepmom, I don’t know that I would have been as magnanimous 

Kaelee1
by Platinum Member on Apr. 17, 2018 at 2:50 PM
6 moms liked this
I would tell your dad to kick rocks. Fuck him.
PJMM
by Emerald Member on Apr. 17, 2018 at 2:50 PM
I don't think you can dictate what she wears lol but my mother refused to tell us what colors she was going to have at my wedding. She didn't want to match my mil. And who cares? Not having her in the receiving line I can see as well as the corsage. The rest.. eh whatever. Make the head table for immediate family only and be done with it.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Apr. 17, 2018 at 2:50 PM
15 moms liked this
Your sister's requests are very reasonable. Your SM would decline to go if she had any class at all.
lily99300
by Ruby Member on Apr. 17, 2018 at 2:50 PM
9 moms liked this

Sounds like a plan to me.  Your father has a lot of balls demanding the mistress be invited.  He should be grateful she's allowed to attend at all.

I would support my sister 100% in her decision.  Why does the new wife want to go anyway?  To mark her territory?  Why can't she just stay home?

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