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I liked it better when it was just us

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 161 Replies
That is what my 9 yr old daughter told me last night. It makes me sad.

My dh is never anything but good to her. He pays lots of attention to her, helps her with homework, plays with her, listens to her. He treats her just as good as treats our son together and has even discussed wanting to adopt her legally.

She said she likes him ok, she just liked it better when he lived somewhere else and just came over sometimes. He and I have lived together for 2 years and have been married for a year. We have a 3 month old son together.

I told her we did have a nice life when it was just the 2 of us but that I think our life is far richer from having dh and her brother in it with us and that I hope that someday she will see that.

I think she was mostly just upset because dh is a stickler about bed time and she was not happy about going to bed last night, lol. But it was just kind of hard to hear.

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 18, 2018 at 6:57 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 18, 2018 at 6:59 AM
3 moms liked this
I liked it better before I got married again too
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 18, 2018 at 7:01 AM
Not me. I love my dh very much and I love our little family. I was very lonely before dh came along. I love my daughter but I am much happier now.

Quoting Anonymous 2: I liked it better before I got married again too
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Apr. 18, 2018 at 7:02 AM
1 mom liked this
I felt that way when my mom married my step Dad when I was 7. I basically lost my Mom after that and my step Dad was awful to me.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 18, 2018 at 7:02 AM
I love my dh, but for me it was easier without

Quoting Anonymous 1: Not me. I love my dh very much and I love our little family. I was very lonely before dh came along. I love my daughter but I am much happier now.

Quoting Anonymous 2: I liked it better before I got married again too
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 18, 2018 at 7:03 AM
I still spend quite a bit of one on one time with her and my dh is not awful. In fact he is pretty awesome and he treats her really well.

Quoting Anonymous 3: I felt that way when my mom married my step Dad when I was 7. I basically lost my Mom after that and my step Dad was awful to me.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Apr. 18, 2018 at 7:03 AM
2 moms liked this
I’m sure it’s probably more than that and it doesn’t sound like she wants or views him as a dad right now. I’d leave things the way they are.

I loved the single life, everything was about me. That’s essentially what your dd had when it was just the two of you. Now every aspect of life is different and she doesn’t love it. She’s rolling with it but she’s honest as well. Your husband is your person, she doesn’t see him the same way that you do and that’s okay.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 18, 2018 at 7:04 AM
1 mom liked this
I do much better with a partner. I really struggled when it was just she and I...but I guess I hid it well. Which is a good thing for dd's sake.

Quoting Anonymous 2: I love my dh, but for me it was easier without

Quoting Anonymous 1: Not me. I love my dh very much and I love our little family. I was very lonely before dh came along. I love my daughter but I am much happier now.

Quoting Anonymous 2: I liked it better before I got married again too
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Apr. 18, 2018 at 7:05 AM
Same. I love my dh, life is good, but I rocked it as a single woman. I loved being in complete control at all times, never having to compromise or think of someone else.

Quoting Anonymous 2: I love my dh, but for me it was easier without

Quoting Anonymous 1: Not me. I love my dh very much and I love our little family. I was very lonely before dh came along. I love my daughter but I am much happier now.

Quoting Anonymous 2: I liked it better before I got married again too
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Apr. 18, 2018 at 7:10 AM
7 moms liked this
That’s just common sense stuff though, he should treat her well no matter what. The fact that he does so doesn’t mean that she has to like or even want him in her life. A nice man being around doesn’t mean that she’s going to want him as a dad now either.

Quoting Anonymous 1: I still spend quite a bit of one on one time with her and my dh is not awful. In fact he is pretty awesome and he treats her really well.

Quoting Anonymous 3: I felt that way when my mom married my step Dad when I was 7. I basically lost my Mom after that and my step Dad was awful to me.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Apr. 18, 2018 at 7:14 AM
3 moms liked this
She isn't your mini-me. She doesn't have to like him just because you do.
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