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Is this fair?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 147 Replies

Two years ago my younger brother moved in with me when he was 16 and I became his legal guardian. When he turned 18 I told him that he had to start paying half the rent if he was going to continue to stay with me. He agreed. 

My rent is 795$ and he pays 398$ and I pay the rest, sometimes he pays only 195$ and I cover everything else. He has a job and is looking into online classes and what not. However, he has been bitching about how it isn't fair that he has to pay the 398$ each month.  And every time I point out that he only pays for half and sometimes less of the rent, he pouts and gives me the silent treatment. 

However, I did the math for all the costs of the home. 

Grocery: Is normally 34.99 to 60.00$ (Small family, I buy cheap)

Transportation: 65$ (Subway monthly pass)

Utilities and Internet/Phone: 216$

Clothes: I set aside 150$

Rent: 795$ (as stated this fluctuates depending on what I am paying)

Childcare/Babysitter: 50-100$ (depending on when I need it)

Emergency Fund: 500$

Medical emergencies not covered by insurance: I put aside 2,000$. 

So roughly, that's 3,886$ of my own money . I am asking him to simply pay half the rent.  Which means that  I would still be paying  3,494$ of the rest of the costs. Yet, he still is saying  that what I am asking of him is unfair! 

Am I seriously being unfair? He is my brother and I want to help him out, but, this is starting to get ridiculous. Any advice would be lovely. Thank you. 

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 23, 2018 at 12:04 PM
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Replies (1-10):
CorpCityGrl
by Ruby Member on Apr. 23, 2018 at 12:06 PM
4 moms liked this

You're not being unfair. You are shouldering the majority of costs and he is acting entitled. If he doesn't like it so much, then he can move out and not only pay rent but utilities and food and every other expense. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 23, 2018 at 12:06 PM
1 mom liked this
You spend $150 on clothes every month? Girl.
susannah2000
by Emerald Member on Apr. 23, 2018 at 12:06 PM
1 mom liked this

No you are not being unfair. He is an adult, and you don't have to pay all the expenses to feed and shelter him. He sounds a bit spoiled. He definitely needs to grow up and pay his share of expenses. On his own, he would be responsible for all of it.

krisnkids
by Platinum Member on Apr. 23, 2018 at 12:08 PM
1 mom liked this

Are you his guardian or not? Do you get any financial assistance because you are his guardian?

Talkingheads
by Emerald Member on Apr. 23, 2018 at 12:08 PM
4 moms liked this
None of those other expenses are his. Not child care,clothes,or emergency fund. Take the rent and utilities and divide between all members of the family. If you are a family of 3 then he would owe 1/3 if the rent and utilities. Everything else is on you
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 23, 2018 at 12:08 PM

I put aside 150$ every month. I have two 6 year olds. Stuff gets ripped, ruined and faded easily lol. 

Quoting Anonymous 2: You spend $150 on clothes every month? Girl.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Apr. 23, 2018 at 12:08 PM
2 moms liked this

Yes, it is unfair he is still only an 18yr old kid.  My kids don't need to start paying half the rent the second they turn 18yrs old.  You are shouldering responsilities onto him that are not his responsibility they're yours. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Apr. 23, 2018 at 12:09 PM
You're not getting any type of foster care credits are you? Are you claiming him on your taxes?
Talkingheads
by Emerald Member on Apr. 23, 2018 at 12:10 PM
Why should he be expected to help.pay her childcare,clothes and emergency fund?

Quoting CorpCityGrl:

You're not being unfair. You are shouldering the majority of costs and he is acting entitled. If he doesn't like it so much, then he can move out and not only pay rent but utilities and food and every other expense. 

Talkingheads
by Emerald Member on Apr. 23, 2018 at 12:10 PM
He's 18

Quoting Anonymous 4: You're not getting any type of foster care credits are you? Are you claiming him on your taxes?
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