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A few questions...parenting advice needed..

Posted by on Aug. 24, 2012 at 5:04 PM
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As some of you may already know (from my other post), I babysit. I watch an 22 month old from 7am-6pm, M-F. I also watch her older sister from 3-6pm and another little girl, who's 2, from 2pm-5pm. Since the other babies have been in our home, my DD, who is four, has started using the bathroom on herself.

Let me back up a little...She started having leaking accidents before I started babysitting. I had her bladder and urine checked and all the tests came out fine. The doctor said she was just 'regressing'. We didn't do much about it. Just helped her change her panties if she had an accident. Now, since I am babysitting, she has complete accidents. She also wants to drink out of a sippy cup (which she hasn't done since she was about18 months) I thought maybe she just needed some more me time. I gave my two weeks notice to stop babysitting.

I guess my question is, does anyone else have a child who has started wetting themselves after being potty trained for a long time? If so, how did you react?

Our plan is to buy her pullups, make changes of clothing easily accessable to her, and ask her every hour or so if she has to potty.And most definitely spend more one on one time with her. DD is a hitter...any tips on that while we're at it?? We don't hit, spank, smack, nothing. We don't even do time-outs. If she doesn't get her way with her siblings, she hits them. She will also bite. I have talked to her, explained to her why hitting is bad and how it hurts. She still does it. I asked her why and her response is usually because they did something that pissed her off. Any tips???

I'm sorry if I didn't put this in the right forum or group..I have put questions like this in other groups but usually get a response like they need a spanking or time out. I am looking more into the unschooling/gentle guidance type of parenting so I thought you ladies may be able to help :)

by on Aug. 24, 2012 at 5:04 PM
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by Member on Sep. 4, 2012 at 7:08 PM

I don't know if this is any help at all you seem like you already know but here goes anyway

Potty thing....i can't think of anything taht you didn't mention. I would do just as you said and take deep breaths. I have not had this experience with children of my own (don't have kids that age yet) but I have had plenty of experience with it in preschool. It's no big deal usually. Kids do just start having accidents sometimes and then about as quick as it started it just stops again. If there is a major stressor in her life that may be a trigger but if not, it's still normal. have clothes handy, help her through it (punishment does nothing which you seem to be aware of) extra time with mommy is great just like you said.

the hitting thing...i usually would try to figure out what causes them to hit and try to teach a more acceptable way to deal with that issue.  You would think that since the child knows the words they would know exactly when and how to use them but a lot of times they do not. Basically I would present her with the tools to deal with her frustrations. It helps to give specific short phrases. ask if you can have a turn, tell him that you were using that, tell her you don't want to play taht game, tell her you don't like that etc.

by Group Owner on Sep. 6, 2012 at 11:45 PM

It's a good idea to allow kids to regress ---to the extent that you actually do treat them like babies again, diapers and all (better than cleaning couches, yes?)

She'll grow out of it again when she's ready, but pushing will only make it take longer.

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