Ask if it's called Head Start because it gives underprivileged kids an advantage, or because it gives incompetent educators an early jump on a federally funded retirement.
Tell him Bono is cutting an album with Ted Nugent.
Remind him that Romney saved Salt Lake City Olympics. When he tries to retort with all the things Obama saved, say, "I said saved, not spent.".
Utter two words 'Merry Christmas'.
Ask why Democrats are so afraid of war. It's only the Republicans who fight in them.
Ask him if he really believes in evolution, why hasn't he yet evolved...and become a Republican.
Tell him the way to get a Democrat to speak is to ask for enlightenment. To get him to shut up, ask for enlistment.
When a Democrat boasts that his party saved the big banks and car companies, point to your minuscule savings, as well as the rusted made-in-the-USA crap box in your driveway, then ask just how he would like to be thanked.
Expose him to a concept with which he is wholly unfamiliar with: the truth.
Ask, "Why do Democrats always get busted for welfare scams? A Republican would never stoop to such a level. He'd realize more money can be made scamming the rich than the poor.
Ask a Democrat if he'd be in favor of the death penalty, if they could create an electric chair that is solar powered.
Ask him whatever happened to the spotted owl.
All of these were borrowed from: Things That Might Annoy a Democrat