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Frequently Asked Questions

Posted by on Dec. 10, 2012 at 2:50 AM
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Frequently Asked Questions

Having read a little bit, you probably have a lot of questions about all this. Rest assured, we're going to answer our most frequently asked questions here.

I

Say what?

Come again?

What is all this non-sense about?

Simple. The world is going to end on December 21, 2012 (the Winter Solstice, as it were). Knowing that, we're advocating the establishment of a world wide Doomsday Celebration Extravaganza to take place on that day. We encourage you to either host or attend a Doomsday Party and live it up before The End. After all, why not?

How do you know the world's going to end?

It's obvious that the world's going to end since the Mayan calendar ends on that date (sort of). Plus my palm reader, Lady Gloria Starferret of the 5th Illuminated Temple of the Ascended Cosmic Goat-herder, told me it was true.

Is there anything we can do to stop this from happening?

No. Our fate is immutably written in the stars, preordained thousands of years ago by ancient wise men who likely received their information from Atlantis, Lemuria, UFOs, primordial gods, or ascended beings from another dimension. So obviously there is nothing you can do, silly.

Should I lie down and put a paper bag over my head?

If you like.

Will it help?

No.

Then what should I do?

Throw a spectacular End of the World/Doomsday/Apocalypse Party! That's what we're going to do anyway, and that's what this web site is all about.

Such a party could get expensive. How can I afford to do all that?

What, are you planning your retirement or something? Sheesh. You'll be dead after December 21st, 2012, so what are you thinking? You should feel free to blow all your life savings on this party since there will be no more parties after the apocalypse. In fact, if you REALLY believe all this, we encourage you to not only cash out your investments, spend your life-savings and your child's college fund, but also to take huge loan or second mortgage to throw into the pot as well. This is your last chance to live it up so don't be a penny-pinching cheapskate.

What if the world doesn't end?

What if...?!? Are you mad? Everyone knows the world is going to end on Decmeber 21st, 2012! Just look it up on Google or, better yet, YouTube. The TRUTH is out there, you know.

How exactly will the world end?

No one knows. We only know that it WILL end. There are a lot of theories, however, ranging from meteor impacts and polar shifts to Ragnarok, the Second Coming of Jesus, a UFO invasion, or the rising of Great Cthulhu from Deep R'lyeh. We've put our money on Cthulhu.

Why are there advertisements on this site?

Everyone else is trying to make a quick buck off the 2012 Doomsday hoopla -- why shouldn't we?

What ads? I don't see ads...

Really? You must be using a real web browser with an ad-blocker plugin. Good for you, you rebel, you!

In all seriousness, is this web site just a joke?

Look at it this way: why not throw an Apocalypse-themed party on December 21st, 2012? Seriously. It could be a load of fun, with great food, great friends, great music, and great drinks, even if it is all done tongue-in-cheek. Of course, don't spend your entire life savings on a theme party, just throw a party to have a good time. That's what it's all about.

 

I knew it!

...And after the party, you might just get eaten by zombies. Enjoy!

by on Dec. 10, 2012 at 2:50 AM
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newmomk
by PREPPER HEAD ADMIT on Dec. 10, 2012 at 2:33 PM

cute

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