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ADHD?

Posted by on Nov. 17, 2012 at 10:07 AM
  • 8 Replies

 Does anyone have a child who suffers with this?

My 10 year old has ADHD, ODD and possiable autism were going to be tesing for that at the beginning of the year. Hes struggled so much in school the last 2 years and its starting to affect our whole family now that hes having race attacks.

I would love to connect with some other moms dealing with what I am and maybe get some new ideas on how to help him. Thanks. =)

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by on Nov. 17, 2012 at 10:07 AM
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Replies (1-8):
mamivon2
by Sandra on Nov. 17, 2012 at 9:38 PM

what are your sons signs of ADHD and autism.. I have a 1o year old as well and is not doing so great in school. not sure if he is just in the i hate school mood and his xbox is more important orwhat.. how is your son behaving and acting at home..

Rain2Rinse
by Representative on Nov. 18, 2012 at 5:53 AM
I'm not in that boat, but I wish you a lot of luck on your journey. From what I hear, it IS a journey. But a rewarding one.
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jesse123456
by on Nov. 18, 2012 at 6:36 AM
2 moms liked this

Two of my sons have ADD and one has the ADHD. Also, I'm a teacher, so I come in contact with a range of students with differing degrees of this ailment. Our opinion, as parents, was that if any of our sons had any other ailment we would readily give the prescribed medicine. So, we willing let them take Ritilin which evolved into Concerta and finally Focalin which was the best of the 3. We didn't medicate on the weekends or during the summer unless there was an event that the focus or the lack of activity would help our son(s).

At home, we developed ways to help them help themselves. Our ADHD son had the most difficulty with the symptoms. He couldn't attend to more than 2 directions at once. He had problems sleeping and still does as an adult. He is constantly on the move and can't see projects through to the end which is getting better now that he is more mature and has found ways to discipline himself. He would always tell us he didn't know what his room was suppose to look like clean which always blew my mind. So, I took pictures of his room straight and clean. I put them on his bulletin board. When I told him to clean his room, he knew to make it look like the pictures. 

For all of the boys, we used check lists for chores. They were listed by days on a chart. We laminated the list. When they completed the chore, they checked it off with a Vis-a-Vis marker. We would wipe it on Sun., and the list started again. We gave one direction at a time. Finish that task and come back to see me. The attention to detail was the hardest to me. Their dad and I would see the little details that they looked over. It could be frustrating, but we tried to remember they weren't doing it deliberately. It was our job to teach them to see it, but it took a long time and a lot of patience. 

We found that praise was our best friend. When they did something right the first time....praise. When they did something without being asked.....praise. When they did something almost to completion....praise the completed part and encourage the rest. It didn't come naturally, but once we got into the habit, we found it relieved our stress and made them not feel that everything they did was going to get critisim. 

ADD/ADHD kids are special. They see the world differently. They have energy to burn. They wear us out. At school, you and your son's teacher need to sit down and find a set of rewards that arent' too over the top that will help your son feel successful. Give him credit for what he does correctly. Shortened assignments go a long way.

ADD students have to have time to absorb a worksheet before they start working. They are like a tub with a too small of a drain and too large of a water spout. All of this water comes rushing in, and they have to attend to ALL OF IT at once. It all backs up, but eventually it will all drain out. It isn't that they are deficit in attention.....they are overflowing with it. They have no filter and attend to everything. So, reduce the amount they have to attend to. Then, slowly, build it back up to the full amount. They have to be trained how to attend to make it productive. We have been appoaching it from the wrong direction IMHO.

You are on a amazing journey. Find a way to turn what he needs to do into something that is organized and allowed. Then, your frustration level will immediately drop. 

JennMcBride
by Jenn on Nov. 18, 2012 at 6:51 PM

 Zach cannot sit still...EVER. He can't even go to the dentist like a normal kid bcause he twitches so much and will not be still, hes not misbehaving just cannot get himself under control to do it. Theres alot of other things as well but thats the main thing that started the testing etc.

 In school he can't learn like the other kids in his class, he can only read a few main words and will get confused and overwhelmed if theres more than a sentence or 2 on the page. He still struggles with the differences between b and d s and 2.

 We have recently found out he has an anxiety disorder as well and are working on treating that, thats the reason for the rage attacks. He builds everything up inside and then eventually it all just bursts out. Were in the middle of more testing for him and finding the right doctors, counslers and possiably medications for him. I knew from a very young age he was behind most kids his age, his speech was delayed and he took speech therapy from 4-7. Hes never slept well..EVER. On a normal night hes lucky to get a full 6 hours if that, he just lays there or watches tv etc.

 I know this was more than you might have wanted lol..sorry about that. If you have concerns talk to his dr or maybe teacher, they sometimes see things we don't at home. GL and Im always here to talk to if you need. =)

 

Quoting mamivon2:

what are your sons signs of ADHD and autism.. I have a 1o year old as well and is not doing so great in school. not sure if he is just in the i hate school mood and his xbox is more important orwhat.. how is your son behaving and acting at home..

 

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JennMcBride
by Jenn on Nov. 18, 2012 at 6:52 PM

 Thank you. =)

Quoting Rain2Rinse:

I'm not in that boat, but I wish you a lot of luck on your journey. From what I hear, it IS a journey. But a rewarding one.

 

CafeMom Tickers
JennMcBride
by Jenn on Nov. 18, 2012 at 6:57 PM

 Thank you so much for writing this to me. Im glad to know others have been through what IM going through now..and made it. =) I love the idea about the pictures of the clean room, we do the chore chart and that helps out alot with all of my kids. In fact since Zach cannot read well it makes it easy for me to tell him one thing at a time and him not feel overwhelmed. Again thank you so much for this. How old are your boys now? I agree with you that ADHD has been looked at and approached the wrong ways for to long. Im very lucky to have a dr that sees it that was as well.

Quoting jesse123456:

Two of my sons have ADD and one has the ADHD. Also, I'm a teacher, so I come in contact with a range of students with differing degrees of this ailment. Our opinion, as parents, was that if any of our sons had any other ailment we would readily give the prescribed medicine. So, we willing let them take Ritilin which evolved into Concerta and finally Focalin which was the best of the 3. We didn't medicate on the weekends or during the summer unless there was an event that the focus or the lack of activity would help our son(s).

At home, we developed ways to help them help themselves. Our ADHD son had the most difficulty with the symptoms. He couldn't attend to more than 2 directions at once. He had problems sleeping and still does as an adult. He is constantly on the move and can't see projects through to the end which is getting better now that he is more mature and has found ways to discipline himself. He would always tell us he didn't know what his room was suppose to look like clean which always blew my mind. So, I took pictures of his room straight and clean. I put them on his bulletin board. When I told him to clean his room, he knew to make it look like the pictures. 

For all of the boys, we used check lists for chores. They were listed by days on a chart. We laminated the list. When they completed the chore, they checked it off with a Vis-a-Vis marker. We would wipe it on Sun., and the list started again. We gave one direction at a time. Finish that task and come back to see me. The attention to detail was the hardest to me. Their dad and I would see the little details that they looked over. It could be frustrating, but we tried to remember they weren't doing it deliberately. It was our job to teach them to see it, but it took a long time and a lot of patience. 

We found that praise was our best friend. When they did something right the first time....praise. When they did something without being asked.....praise. When they did something almost to completion....praise the completed part and encourage the rest. It didn't come naturally, but once we got into the habit, we found it relieved our stress and made them not feel that everything they did was going to get critisim. 

ADD/ADHD kids are special. They see the world differently. They have energy to burn. They wear us out. At school, you and your son's teacher need to sit down and find a set of rewards that arent' too over the top that will help your son feel successful. Give him credit for what he does correctly. Shortened assignments go a long way.

ADD students have to have time to absorb a worksheet before they start working. They are like a tub with a too small of a drain and too large of a water spout. All of this water comes rushing in, and they have to attend to ALL OF IT at once. It all backs up, but eventually it will all drain out. It isn't that they are deficit in attention.....they are overflowing with it. They have no filter and attend to everything. So, reduce the amount they have to attend to. Then, slowly, build it back up to the full amount. They have to be trained how to attend to make it productive. We have been appoaching it from the wrong direction IMHO.

You are on a amazing journey. Find a way to turn what he needs to do into something that is organized and allowed. Then, your frustration level will immediately drop. 

 

CafeMom Tickers
G2Mama
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 2:10 PM
1 mom liked this

My son has ADHD as well as APD, once we figured it out and got him what he needed he has excelled!  Making honor roll and was voted as the class H.E.R.O (helping encouraging, respecting, others)

jesse123456
by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 6:52 AM

My oldest is 28. We knew he was ADD in 1st grade when he told me the noise on the playground bothered him when he was trying to work. He spent 4 years in the US Coast Guard and has 2 beautiful children.My middle is now 26 and the one with the HYPERACTIVITY. (It must be caps because lower case doesn't describe his energy.)  He has finally matured enough to manage his impulse issues without someone helping all of the time. He makes lots of lists on his phone with reminders. He is a computer engineer/technology major - finally! The youngest will be 18 next week. He came to terms with his ADD the earliest. He told me he decided it could control him or he could control it. So, he made the decision that he would embrace it and deal with it instead of getting all perjiggity about it. He just acheived the rank of Eagle Scout, he is the section leader in his high school band, and will graduate in June. He has plans to go to college, work with the BSA national staff at a high adventure camp this coming summer, march with a drum corps a couple of years, do 4 years in the USCG, and then teach music. He has it all planned out. 

I don't know. Our kids are individual people with unique and wonderful personalities. We can work with them or try to stuff them in our version of 'round hole/square peg'. We have to guide them and train them, but we also have to let them learn to be the best they can be with what they bring to the table. Otherwise, we spend our entire time pushing and pulling them instead of walking with them.

These kids needs a strong yet compassionate disciplinarian. They have to know the boundaries and that they are fixed. It gives them a sense of stability. We can't be wishy-washy and things not being ok today, but tomorrow they get a pass. It can be exhausting sometimes but so worth the effort when you see the end result.

Our kids took us on a wonderful journey. We rode the wave when it was good, and waited out the trough when it was bad. There was always another wave coming behind us.

Quoting JennMcBride:

 Thank you so much for writing this to me. Im glad to know others have been through what IM going through now..and made it. =) I love the idea about the pictures of the clean room, we do the chore chart and that helps out alot with all of my kids. In fact since Zach cannot read well it makes it easy for me to tell him one thing at a time and him not feel overwhelmed. Again thank you so much for this. How old are your boys now? I agree with you that ADHD has been looked at and approached the wrong ways for to long. Im very lucky to have a dr that sees it that was as well.

Quoting jesse123456:

Two of my sons have ADD and one has the ADHD. Also, I'm a teacher, so I come in contact with a range of students with differing degrees of this ailment. Our opinion, as parents, was that if any of our sons had any other ailment we would readily give the prescribed medicine. So, we willing let them take Ritilin which evolved into Concerta and finally Focalin which was the best of the 3. We didn't medicate on the weekends or during the summer unless there was an event that the focus or the lack of activity would help our son(s).

At home, we developed ways to help them help themselves. Our ADHD son had the most difficulty with the symptoms. He couldn't attend to more than 2 directions at once. He had problems sleeping and still does as an adult. He is constantly on the move and can't see projects through to the end which is getting better now that he is more mature and has found ways to discipline himself. He would always tell us he didn't know what his room was suppose to look like clean which always blew my mind. So, I took pictures of his room straight and clean. I put them on his bulletin board. When I told him to clean his room, he knew to make it look like the pictures. 

For all of the boys, we used check lists for chores. They were listed by days on a chart. We laminated the list. When they completed the chore, they checked it off with a Vis-a-Vis marker. We would wipe it on Sun., and the list started again. We gave one direction at a time. Finish that task and come back to see me. The attention to detail was the hardest to me. Their dad and I would see the little details that they looked over. It could be frustrating, but we tried to remember they weren't doing it deliberately. It was our job to teach them to see it, but it took a long time and a lot of patience. 

We found that praise was our best friend. When they did something right the first time....praise. When they did something without being asked.....praise. When they did something almost to completion....praise the completed part and encourage the rest. It didn't come naturally, but once we got into the habit, we found it relieved our stress and made them not feel that everything they did was going to get critisim. 

ADD/ADHD kids are special. They see the world differently. They have energy to burn. They wear us out. At school, you and your son's teacher need to sit down and find a set of rewards that arent' too over the top that will help your son feel successful. Give him credit for what he does correctly. Shortened assignments go a long way.

ADD students have to have time to absorb a worksheet before they start working. They are like a tub with a too small of a drain and too large of a water spout. All of this water comes rushing in, and they have to attend to ALL OF IT at once. It all backs up, but eventually it will all drain out. It isn't that they are deficit in attention.....they are overflowing with it. They have no filter and attend to everything. So, reduce the amount they have to attend to. Then, slowly, build it back up to the full amount. They have to be trained how to attend to make it productive. We have been appoaching it from the wrong direction IMHO.

You are on a amazing journey. Find a way to turn what he needs to do into something that is organized and allowed. Then, your frustration level will immediately drop. 

 


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