Ok ladies. I need serious advice. This is for moms. ;-( UPDATE on page 2
Just a note. I am coming to you all for advice on a tough and sensitive topic. I am not looking for judgement or rude comments. If you are new to this group and are used to other groups such as Mom Confessions where everyone shows their asses on a daily basis, please close out and move on. I need real mom based advice. Thanks in advance, with that said...
My MIL got my 8 year old an iPod touch for Christmas. I spent most of the day setting it up, downloading games and setti g parental controls and restrictions on it. I blocked you tube, safari, her ability to add people, see inappropriate content etc...
ff to last night. She has been at my dads, then at my moms house since Tues. I get a call from my mom telli g me she had picked up Rylies iPod to move it and the screen popped on with all kinds of porn on it. Like pics etc. I of course freaked out and asked that my step dad remove it. I was convinced something had happened and that she had been hacked or what have you. That may still have been what originally happened, but my step dad went in to find it all and I get this message from my mom.
"Destiny the porn site was bookmarked on the Internet. Also the words fuck my ass were in the search engine. Does Rylie know how to bookmark? She said she doesn't. On our way to Church. "
I was pretty sure she didn't know how to bookmark.
Later that evening I get this
"Rylie told me that Bob was flipping through the channels the other night and she saw some porn movies although he didn't stay own the movie. She did seem to worry about even telling me this though. ( bob is my FIL) "
I am beyond pissed, scared, dumbfounded, freaked out, and at a loss. Porn videos, and pics???? Are you kidding me?
I have zero clue where she would have heard that kind of phrase, I put all the parent blocks on her iPod available and clearly it didn't work, I can't imagine why my 8 year old would search this out, and she is coming home tomorrow. I don't know how to approach this subject. It is a sticky situation. I have always made it clear ,y kids can come to me with anything, but, now she is searching this crap behind our backs, and is extremely embarrassed. My mom told me tonight Rylie keeps saying her tummy hurts, and she feels sick. I know she is afraid to come home and have to deal with this, part of that is good as it means she understands this is not acceptable, part not good. I don't want to make her feel like she can't ask me stuff, but she needs to know this is not acceptable and it is a trust issue.
I am just not sure how to nail down where she heard this crap to begin with, make her feel comfortable talking to me, and make it clear this is unacceptable all at the same time. What would you do. HOW do you talk to your 8 almost 9 year old about this? I haven't even had the birds and bees talk yet, how do we get ff'd to this?!? I want to puke.
Have you ever had to deal with this, if so what did you do? If you haven't how would you deal with it?
Again I am looking for serious and helpful advice. This is not normal behavior, isn't acceptable for the age, and if you think it is, move on.
My mom did ask my daughter if anyone had ever tried to do things like that to her and she said no, unequivocally. She said Grammy you know I'd tell mommy and you. ;-(