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nothing like a stab in the heart :(

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not sure how many of you know but we lost a little girl at 33 weeks gestation in July 2011.   our oldest was newly 5 at the time very excited about having a new baby sister.

well tonight as we were walking from downtown home after her cheerleading practices she burst out into tears!  I stopped and asked her what was wrong well she proceeds to tell me 'I wish Phoenix (the baby) could have a life so I could play with her and see her grow up'  I wasnt/still not sure what to say to her besides it's ok to cry, it's ok to be sad we all have days/times that we are sad still about her not being with us.   But it just kind of crushed me that she was so upset.

the only thing that I can think of that may have even triggered her to thinking about her sister (which I could be completely wrong I know this) is that there was a newborn at cheerleading tonight but I thought that baby was there every week maybe tonight was just the first time she noticed?  I have no clue

sorry this is so long..i'm just rambling now venting/thinking about this now that the girls are finally asleep 

Mommy to two girls here on earth and one in Heaven watching over us

by on Feb. 15, 2013 at 10:47 PM
Replies (11-14):
by on Feb. 17, 2013 at 10:34 AM
I know it hurts.
Just keep reminding yourself that some day you may see her again. Hugs.
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by on Feb. 17, 2013 at 11:51 AM

 Awwe so sorry :(! It's weird how something can trigger a child to remember something that happened so long ago. I hope that she's ok & you too!

by Angel on Feb. 17, 2013 at 3:52 PM
I know the feeling i had a still born on Jan 17th of 09 and to this day it is still hard on me but i have to stay strong.i was 40 weeks n had no idea i was even prego with her.
Dec 28th 2011 i was blessed and was able to keep him.
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by Member on Feb. 17, 2013 at 6:16 PM

I lost my son's twin very early in my pregnancy.  We'd named him Jessie.  My older son talked about him all the time when he was little, and to this day he wishes he'd had him here.  When my second child was born, when he was old enough, we explained the story of Jessie to him and he looked really confused and said, "But I'm Jessie!"  The hair stood up on the back of my neck.....

I'm terribly sorry for your loss....losing is a child is just plain horrible.

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