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8 People Every Parent Would Love to Hire

Posted by on May. 31, 2013 at 10:14 AM
  • 4 Replies

8 People Every Parent Would Love to Hire

by Adriana Velez

dirty dishesDid you hear about the Craigslist ad some desperate parent posted to cure her picky eater kids? The ad called for a "really skinny person" who could act hungry in front of the kids. Apparently the parent had been telling their kids that people are starving and would love to have that food they reject night after night, and it's just not sinking in. So now the parent wants to "force them to throw away the food from their unfinished plates in front of someone who is really really skinny who will act hungry." Because that's not a crazy thing to do at all.

Okay, rumor has it this Craigslist ad is just a joke -- a sick, sick joke. We kind of hope it is, because the writer's description of exactly what kind of skinny person they want to hire is too, too ... something. But if we're talking about outside-the-box parents' helpers, I've got a few better ideas.

Nighttime Parent

Do your kids wake up in the middle of the night asking for a drink of water? Something to eat? Their lost blankie? Help chasing away a monster? The last few shreds of your sanity? I want someone to take care of all these requests for me so I can sleep through the night for once.

Scullery Maid

I would love my own Downton Abbey kitchen staff, cutting up vegetables and then washing all the dishes for me after dinner.

Chauffeur

Wouldn't you love it if someone could drive your kids everywhere for you? All those lessons and soccer practices. Not only that, they'd have the kids' schedule memorized so you'd never have to remind them of anything. And they would ALWAYS be on time.

Sanitation Technician

In other words, diaper changer. Enough said.

Meal Planner

Can someone please just tell me what to make for dinner? But it has to be something I actually want to eat. And that my kids will eat. And that won't take forever to cook.

Referee

We could use a little help dealing with all those little squabbles the kids have. Oh, and maybe with the bigger squabbles we have with our spouses, too. (P.S. I am always right.)

Potty Whisperer

A potty training specialist who can gently lead your child down the road to potty independence.

Detective

Where are your keys? Where is your daughter's favorite skirt? Where did we leave your son's hoodie? Where is that stuffed bunny he can't sleep without? Where is your wallet?

Who would you add to the list?

by on May. 31, 2013 at 10:14 AM
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Replies (1-4):
DixieL
by Dixie on May. 31, 2013 at 6:25 PM

I would have wanted someone who could have gotten my son in the bathtub, and get his hair washed, without his having a fit. My son was also and still is a very picky eater, so your Meal Planner would have been good. I love to cook, so i could have cooked, just someone who could plan what he would eat.

AngryBob
by on Jun. 1, 2013 at 9:27 AM
1 mom liked this

people pay other people to do these things?? i would make millions!

JulieJacobKyle
by on Jun. 1, 2013 at 1:18 PM

Of those, I would only really want someone to plan my meals, prep them, cook them, and clean up afterward.  Also someone to clean my bathrooms!  Everything else I am fine with doing myself.

Ambear72
by Amber on Jun. 2, 2013 at 8:10 PM
I want a cook/nutritionist/food shopper and a housekeeper. I didn't mind dirty diapers, I didn't mind potty training, or driving my kids around. I hate doing dishes, and I would love someone to come in and teach me how to shop, eat and cook, better. Better as in healthier.
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