Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Do You Ask Vistors To Remove Their Shoes In Your Home?

Posted by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 10:29 AM
  • 23 Replies

Making People Take Off Their Shoes in Your House Is Not Rude

Posted by Adriana Velez

slippersA lot of families have a no-shoes rule for their homes. It just makes sense, especially for those of us who do the cleaning up after our kids stomp around in mud, playground gravel, and goodness knows what else. And wearing slippers or socks indoors makes everyone feel more cozy at home. I feel like taking my shoes off as soon as I get home helps me transition into a totally different (more relaxed!) mindset. It's the way I was raised, and wearing shoes inside just feels weird.

But I take this healthy habit a step further. I make all our visitors take off their shoes, too. Whether it's kids on a play date or adults coming over for dinner, I'll politely ask you to remove your shoes. In fact, I'm totally shameless about asking everyone.

I know some people think it's rude to ask visitors to remove their shoes. And I still remember that Sex and the City episode where Carrie's Manolos got stolen when a host forced her to remove them. Not everyone comes over prepared to go shoeless, I know -- and I'm not sure hanging out barefoot in my home is much better. 

But ... I just can't abide shoes indoors. In New York City, we're always walking over urine, garbage juice, dried vomit, and all kinds of toxic waste. I don't want that tracked into my home! Plus, I don't want to torment my downstairs neighbors with the sound of noisy shoes clunking around overhead. That sound carries like crazy in my building, even with rugs on the floor.

The only people who are exempt are workers. If you're here to fix the sink, install cable, or paint the walls, by all means: Keep your shoes on. Asking fix-it guys to take off their shoes just feels like going too far.

You know what, though? Asking our guests to remove their shoes in my home is never a problem. Maybe it's just that in the city, it's sort of a given that most people take off their shoes when they get home. Usually, my adult visitors kick off their shoes automatically out of habit (on the other hand, most kids will just run in). I don't even say anything.

And by the way, shoes are safe in my hallway. I've known my neighbors for 14 years. They are not shoe-stealers. And none of my friends wear Manolos. For the record, no one covets their dusty brown Merrell mocs, their dingy gray New Balance sneakers, their scuffed clogs. No one. And for those who are worried, I have no problem with people leaving their shoes just inside next to the door.

Ideally, though, I would have a lovely basket filled with soft guest slippers in all sizes. I've known other families who do this and I've just never gotten organized enough to do it myself. I know it would make asking a lot more gracious if I could also hand over the perfect pair of slippers. Make yourself more comfortable! (And help me keep my home clean ...)

Do you ask visitors to remove their shoes in your home?

by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 10:29 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 12:16 PM

I am diabetic and one of the first things they tell you is to never go barefoot.  You are always supposed to wear shoes to prevent foot injuries.  I would never be able to visit you if I have to take my shoes off.

by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:07 PM

Yes we do

by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 9:39 PM

Yes we do. 

by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 9:40 PM

I have new carpet & a toddler who plays on the floor. I agree that shoes are not only dirty with dirt from time to time but all sorts of nasty germs. ever step in a public restroom lol? 

by Misha on Jan. 14, 2013 at 9:42 PM
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by Misha on Jan. 14, 2013 at 9:43 PM
Most people that come over usually do it on their own.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by Sarah on Jan. 15, 2013 at 8:53 AM

Yes. Although I rarely have to ask. People usually ask them if I want them to remove them. When I go to someone else's house, I always ask as well.

by Member on Jan. 15, 2013 at 2:58 PM

I guess I'm the odd one out then. No I don't and I hate anyone who requests I take my shoes off. Mainly because I'm self conscious about my feet. You're going to clean your floor anyway regardless. So unless you have caked on mudd on your shoes, I see no reason to take them off.

by Member on Jan. 15, 2013 at 5:56 PM

Most visitors to my house take off their shoes on their own when they come in. It's not a big deal to me one way or the other unless there's extreme weather they've trekked through on their way to my door (and by extreme weather, I mean rain/mud/sleet/snow).

by Member on Jan. 15, 2013 at 6:01 PM

I don't ask them.  When I open the door, I simply look at them, gesture to the rug by the door and say "You can put your shoes there."  It's kind of implied since my husband and I don't wear shoes, and there on the rug are our shoes.  I take my shoes off at other's houses without being asked.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)