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Dealing with Kids Personal Fashion Tastes

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Everyone has their own fashion sense. This is a good thing, because it allows each of us to express our own sense of creativity - and our children are certainly not left out of this. After all, who among us hasn't seen a child dressed in public, and smiled to ourselves, knowing that the child must have dressed himself? Or gone to the grocery store with a little girl wearing a tutu, tiara, frog rain boots and a super hero cape?

Sometimes, it's just not worth the battle. It doesn't matter, in the long run, if your child wears the same pants for a month - as long as you can wash them, of course - or refuses to wear the color orange.

There may be some times, though, that you have to fight the good fight. You may be going to visit grandma, and you just know that grandma will make a fuss if Junior isn't in a suit and tie. So, you have to compromise. How can you meet the fashion needs and desires of your child without squashing their individuality, and help them to stay appropriately clothed in a non attention grabbing fashion?

  • Pick your battles - Be stubborn about something else. Not everything is a battle. Is it really super important that your child go to church dressed nicely? Then maybe you can let go of the control when the child goes to the park. You can't be in charge every single time - your child has to feel a sense of autonomy in order to develop a sense of self.
  • Be willing to compromise - Sometimes, you have to let go and allow your child to wear that purple tie with a yellow shirt. Maybe you will be insistent that your daughter wear a dress, but you can let her wear brightly colored tights and boots.
  • Understand that they aren't trying to be difficult - Your child is learning to develop a sense of self and not trying to make you mad. Well, not in this instance, probably. So don't take it personally when your son tells you that your choices stink. He doesn't really mean it. (I hope.)
  • Go with the flow - It's a true testament to parenting that there's always going to be something going on, something to get annoyed about, something that will need your effort and attention. Clothing probably isn't worth it - unless it's morally offensive or completely against your ethical values, it's probably not worth the argument.

How do you help your child learn to develop a sense of style without having an enormous argument?


by on Nov. 18, 2012 at 8:10 PM
Replies (41-47):
by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 11:08 PM
Sounds like it does.

Quoting SweetLuci:

 I set the peramaters...basically what the school sets, and the amount to be spent, and within that, she can choose what she likes. It's worked well.

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by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 11:08 PM

Quoting 4kidz916:

I let them express themself in their clothing as long as it is within good taste and is age appropriate.  I don't put up a big arguement about style usually. 

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by on Dec. 3, 2012 at 2:50 PM

Compromise. But this can be a struggle.

by Member on Dec. 4, 2012 at 3:45 PM

I give my opinions on clothes so they can hear it, and I refuse to buy something that I find inappropriate, otherwise they can have their own fashion sense all the way.  My kids are pretty headstrong in their own way so they make good choices

by on Dec. 7, 2012 at 1:50 AM

 Anything in the closet is for school, church, and nice events. One drawer in the dresser also holds school/church/event pants (but honestly he wears them for whatever, he's a boy - I'm not going to argue as long as they're not holey and stained).

Then everything on the right side of the dress is all play clothes that he can wear around the house, to the park, outside, etc.

As long as he's presentable (no holes, rips, or large stains) I let him go as he is. However if I notice something and say "that has a _____, go find a new shirt and bring that one to me." he will without a fuss.

by on Dec. 7, 2012 at 1:51 AM

 oh and DD has nice clothes in the closet and nothing but play clothes in her dresser. That way she can dress herself in play clothes as needed throughout the day and her nice clothes stay out of reach and away from getting dirty.

by on Dec. 31, 2012 at 10:23 AM

 aslong as its weather appropriate she can wear anything in her wardrobe

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