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Do you argue in front of your kids?

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Sometimes, my husband and I argue. We have disagreements (usually about the garbage or refilling the Brita or what is on TV)...and these oft times happen in front of our kiddo. Is that bad? I don't necessarily think so... because we purposely "fight fair." It is something we set out at the beginning of our marriage. Meaning no screaming, no hitting, no name-calling, staying on the topic at hand, apologizing when you've hurt someone else's feelings, that kind of thing.

Now, do our voices become raised and take on a different tone? Sure. We usually end up laughing, but we make sure to tell Kiddo, "Hey, we are having a disagreement on XYZ." We go on and say that we love each other and are happy with each other...but even with someone you love, you can disagree at times.

I'm told over and over that we are the main models for our kids when it comes to eating and manners. So I like to think that this teaches her how relationships work, how to safely and honestly express feelings and opinions in a respectful way with someone you love. That is a valuable skill to learn right? We all know there will be time you may disagree with a friend, a loved one, a family member. That it happens sometimes in relationships. And that is okay...when done in a healthy way. And she will, hopefully, be able to know if someone doesn't treat her respectfully, that that isn't okay or a good relationship.

At least that is my hope. Dang, it is hard, isn't it? Navigating this whole element of your relationship and how it impacts your kids.

Do you argue in front of your kids? How has your relationship with your spouse changed since having kids? 

© timsa

by on Jan. 9, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Replies (21-30):
by Gold Member on Jan. 9, 2013 at 11:27 AM

not really...but we have said one or two things on very rare occasions

by Gold Member on Jan. 9, 2013 at 12:34 PM

We try not to but sometimes it happens. If it is getting heated we stop and walk away, pick up later when we are alone. 

by Gold Member on Jan. 9, 2013 at 1:05 PM

We try not to.

by Member on Jan. 9, 2013 at 1:16 PM

 we have disagreements in front of the kids not full blown arguments

by Member on Jan. 9, 2013 at 1:18 PM

We do, but only about stupid little things.  We don't usually have SERIOUS arguments in front of the kids.  That was save for when they are in bed or not around.

by on Jan. 9, 2013 at 1:30 PM

Ummm we  do not argue much but we have in the past. It doesn't get ugly  or anything.

by on Jan. 9, 2013 at 1:51 PM
Yes we have. Unfortunately if I'm awake I normally have a child with me.
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by Gold Member on Jan. 9, 2013 at 2:48 PM
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by on Jan. 9, 2013 at 2:56 PM

We try not to, but we do.  We discussed it and we decided that kids need to see that it's healthy to disagree and they need to see that we still love each other even when we are mad.

Our relationship has changed, not for the worse, but it's different than it was before kids.

by Silver Member on Jan. 9, 2013 at 4:47 PM
Some times but we try not to
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