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Can You Affair-Proof Your Marriage?

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Keeping the spark alive is a challenge in even the strongest marriages. Andrew, Joanie and Chuck are joined by Dr. Logan Levkoff, a Sexologist and Sexuality Educator, to talk about how you can make sure your relationship “goes the distance!”

Check out what they are talking about and tell us what you think about affair-proofing your marriage. 


by on Mar. 18, 2013 at 11:17 AM
Replies (41-50):
Basherte
by Bronze Member on Mar. 19, 2013 at 8:20 AM
1 mom liked this

LOL

You can affair proof your side of the marriage. You can't affair proof the spouses side of it though. 

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ZsMommy
by on Mar. 19, 2013 at 9:07 AM


Quoting fraujones:

How to affair-proof your marriage? Don't cheat. You are responsible for your own fidelity and your spouse is responsible for his. This panel shares some great tips for keeping "the spark alive" but I don't think it should be termed "affair-proofing."

Totally agree.

While the panel offers ways of keeping interest in a marriage,I agree with fraujones that the title should not be "affair proof"

Bmat
by Bronze Member on Mar. 19, 2013 at 9:48 AM
Something that keeps my marriage strong is the weekend trips we take- not far away- an easy drive- and we stay in B&Bs usually. We talk, hold hands and stroll around, eat leisurely meals- away from the cares of running a household.
Azure
by on Mar. 19, 2013 at 9:52 AM
No you cannot. You can control yourself, but you have no control over the actions of your spouse. No one is immune to being tempted. However, there are things you can do to keep your relationship strong, healthy and fun. Above all I think open communication is essential.
Mommyfish831
by on Mar. 19, 2013 at 10:04 AM
1 mom liked this

I have never heard it like that but I completely agree.  If a male and female spend time together alone or long periods talking or texting and either one of them are married or committed, in my opinion that is at least borderline to cheating.  Even if the two are really just friends its not ever a good idea to be alone with them.  I personally don't have male friends and never have, I am just very awkward around the opposite sex, lol.

Quoting sukainah:

Trust is a big way.  We have a saying in Islam that if a man and woman are alone together the 3rd is Satan.  I know some may not believe that but it makes sense to me.


imuney
by New Member on Mar. 19, 2013 at 10:13 AM

 Marriage can only be affair proof by choice. Either youre committed or youre not and the same goes for them. It about much more than keeping a spark alive. Its all about perspctive. Some things are not as important as they seem,and "lust" is one of them.  Lust wont hold your hand during chemo or the loss of a child,but commitment will. Lust wont stay and help you rebuild when a hurricane washes away your entire life,but commitment will.  Marriage is not about lust. It is about being a person of integrity and honoring a promise you made. Commitment is the act of staying when its not fun.  

mama2gg
by on Mar. 19, 2013 at 10:17 AM

 lol of course you can don't marry a boy marry a man and marry someone that you trust and trusts you why get married to someone if you dont want to not have sex with anyone else this is VERY easy

mama2gg
by on Mar. 19, 2013 at 10:19 AM

 %100000 disagree ALL my friends are MALE and i have ZERO interest in having sex with them i LOVE , ADORE, and RESPECT my husband he also has female friends that he is *gasp* alone with lololol.....there is NO issue with cheating when you have someone that has NO INTERST in anyone but you when you have to worry about "what they would do alone" you shouldn't even be married to them AT ALL!

Quoting Mommyfish831:

I have never heard it like that but I completely agree.  If a male and female spend time together alone or long periods talking or texting and either one of them are married or committed, in my opinion that is at least borderline to cheating.  Even if the two are really just friends its not ever a good idea to be alone with them.  I personally don't have male friends and never have, I am just very awkward around the opposite sex, lol.

Quoting sukainah:

Trust is a big way.  We have a saying in Islam that if a man and woman are alone together the 3rd is Satan.  I know some may not believe that but it makes sense to me.


 

lifeforchrist
by on Mar. 19, 2013 at 11:03 AM

The first problem is the over emphasis on sex. Sex is not the basis of your relationship and if it is then expect an affair. Because sex will not always be great and not always happens when you want it. Work on being best friends and that spark will never go.

la_bella_vita
by Gold Member on Mar. 19, 2013 at 11:49 AM

 Our marriage is affair proof because we both married with the intention and expectation that cheating is wrong and would never be welcome.

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