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My BFF is dating a man in prison, he's getting out soon

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 221 Replies

My best friend of more than 10 years has a boyfriend in prison. They started out as pen pals and quickly "fell in love." He was convicted of stealing a car. He will be released from prison soon, after completing his 5-year sentence, and plans on moving in with her.
Neither my husband nor I want to get to know this man, visit him in their home or entertain him in ours. My husband is adamant about never socializing with them.
I care deeply for my friend and want her to be happy, but I think she's making a huge mistake. How can I continue this friendship?

Posted by Anonymous on May. 13, 2013 at 9:56 AM
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Replies (1-10):
liveforever
by Gold Member on May. 13, 2013 at 10:01 AM
1 mom liked this

Thats a tough one. Have you talked to her about any of this?

Im sorry Im not sure how I would even handle this, I dont have any good advice.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on May. 13, 2013 at 10:05 AM
6 moms liked this
I used to think everyone deserves a second chance and everyone deserves to be loved, but from my personal experience, once a criminal, always a criminal. They can get their second chance with someone else, I don't trust them, good luck with your friend.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on May. 13, 2013 at 10:05 AM
22 moms liked this

Wow way to not give people 2nd chances.

Many learn their lesson in jail.

Now I do believe she is moving to fast, but I would never just write someone off for a mistake.

He didn't kill or physically harm anyone.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on May. 13, 2013 at 10:05 AM
11 moms liked this

A big reason people re-offend is not being able to eke out a living or social life after being convicted.  His crime was non-violent.  I say sit down with him for one evening.  If he's terrible or obviously lying, don't associate with him.  If you don't get the heebie jeebies you can get to know him a little at a time.

My brother is looking at serious time.  I wouldn't leave him alone with my children, but I still love him and he really is a decently good person, his situation just got completely out of control. 

mstricey
by on May. 13, 2013 at 10:11 AM
11 moms liked this
Just because someone has been to prison doesn't mean they are a bad person. It means they did a bad/stupid thing. Stealing a car wasnt the smartest thing to do and it was not ok at all, but it was a non violent crime. Give the guy a chance and stop being so judgemental.
jacandjay
by on May. 13, 2013 at 10:12 AM
2 moms liked this



Quoting mstricey:

Just because someone has been to prison doesn't mean they are a bad person. It means they did a bad/stupid thing. Stealing a car wasnt the smartest thing to do and it was not ok at all, but it was a non violent crime. Give the guy a chance and stop being so judgemental.

imultracool
by on May. 13, 2013 at 10:13 AM
4 moms liked this
Hes served his time, give him a chance. Everyone makes mistakes. Some of us just make bigger ones. Doesnt mean we are going to be shitty ppl for the rest of our lives.
kgsharber
by on May. 13, 2013 at 10:13 AM
8 moms liked this

I think he is paying his debt.  Go into this with an open mind and AT LEAST meet him. If, after meeting him, you have the same feelings then you can at least say you tried, but considering his crime is just stealing a car I would not be a judge & jury to him just yet.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on May. 13, 2013 at 10:14 AM
4 moms liked this
I think yall are very judgy people. Not all ex cons are horrible people and it's not like he was in for rape or murder.
ArmyWife112908
by on May. 13, 2013 at 10:16 AM
5 moms liked this
Dont judge him until you meet him. Maybe he was young and dumb and made a bad choice alot changes in 5years. After you meet him go with your gut.
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