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Communicating Beyond "That"

Posted by on Jul. 26, 2013 at 12:00 AM
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1 mom liked this

Missions, purpose, goals. Andrew and Chuck were both pretty adamant about how our guys need our support when they go out and tackle said goals.  But, um, what if you aren't exactly sure what that mission is? Even Andrew said, he's switched it up at times.

He's allowed, of course, to change it up. We are all allowed to do that with our focus of life. Sure the underlying element of his life is steady, but so now he's pumped about a soccer team instead of a business thing. All well and good, but, as with everything, it comes back to something we've chatted about here A LOT (yes, I capitalized it, bolded it and added italics because it deserves it): communication. It's all well and good if your man has a mission and he's laser-beam-focused on it, but if you don't know what it is, how can you go about being his number one supporter?

So, we need them to let us know, clue us in, give us a head's up on not only what he's challenged himself with but also how best to support him (give him extra time, listen to his ideas, offer your own or stay silent).  

And now it is time for another generalization (we are full of those this week, eh?): men aren't the best communicators. Although, truth be told, we aren't either at times. Men and women definitely come to the Communication Table from different ends, carrying different chairs, but when we are at the table, we need to talk, really talk.

How do you know what your guy needs support with? Does he let you know? Do you have to guess?

©iStockphoto.com/ JoePotato                       

by on Jul. 26, 2013 at 12:00 AM
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Replies (1-10):
TheJerseyGirl
by Silver Member on Jul. 26, 2013 at 6:56 AM

 Lately it's been his career. We had a rough patch and it almost ruined us financially. Now that things are as they should be, I feel like he needs constant praise on what a good provider he is.

That, and telling him he looks fine without hair...lol!

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RobynS
by Silver Member on Jul. 26, 2013 at 9:07 AM

Communication? HA! Yes, I capitalized, bolded and put that in italics, too! After 16 years together, DH still doesn't know how to communicate. And when I try, he looks like a deer in headlights. So, yeah... it's pretty much guesswork for me. :/

4kidz916
by Member on Jul. 26, 2013 at 9:35 AM

My ex was the same way.  

Quoting RobynS:

Communication? HA! Yes, I capitalized, bolded and put that in italics, too! After 16 years together, DH still doesn't know how to communicate. And when I try, he looks like a deer in headlights. So, yeah... it's pretty much guesswork for me. :/


Bmat
by Bronze Member on Jul. 26, 2013 at 10:51 AM

I pretty much have to guess. And he'd rather be independent than ask for help.

GwenMB
by Bronze Member on Jul. 26, 2013 at 11:14 AM

My DH usually tells me what he wants to do & what he needs me to do to help him.

MichelleK41
by Bronze Member on Jul. 26, 2013 at 11:36 AM

Oh yeah mine def. lets me know but only after he does the quiet thing on me, LOL.

michiganmom116
by on Jul. 26, 2013 at 11:37 AM

Mine doesn't talk, but usually it's work-related.

arpazia
by Silver Member on Jul. 26, 2013 at 11:42 AM
1 mom liked this
Oh, I feel ya!
Dh would rather shoot him self in the toe.


Quoting RobynS:

Communication? HA! Yes, I capitalized, bolded and put that in italics, too! After 16 years together, DH still doesn't know how to communicate. And when I try, he looks like a deer in headlights. So, yeah... it's pretty much guesswork for me. :/


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Madelaine
by Bronze Member on Jul. 26, 2013 at 12:06 PM

My husband is getting better at communicating his needs.  Lately it has been his career that is the focus.

sanj1213
by on Jul. 26, 2013 at 1:17 PM

Dh has always communicated with me. No guess work here:)

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