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My MIL cleaned our house while we were away

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

My husband and I were on a 4-day mini vacation and asked his parents to cat-sit.  When we got home I discovered that his mom cleaned our kitchen and vacuumed.  This really annoyed me.  I can see cleaning your sons house if he was living by himself or was younger, but my husband and I have been married 2 years, living together for 5, and he is 3-years shy of being 30.  I feel this is very intrusive, an invasion of privacy, and disrespectful as if she's saying my cleaning skills are not good enough for her son. 

Is it just me? Or would this bother anyone else?

Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 30, 2013 at 1:36 PM
Replies (31-38):
SweetLuci
by Silver Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 11:49 PM

 DH and I stayed at my son & his wife's to watch dgd while they were on a cruise. We were in their house, and I was studk in the house all day. I cleaned the house and make some meals and put in the freezer. I felt like it was something I could do for them. They both work long hours. I remember what that was like. At first my dil was upset, she thought I was saying she wasn't a good housekeeper. I talked to her and told her I was just trying to help out because I remember what it was like to work and not have time to always clean like I would like. I was not saying anything about her housekeeping.

I think you should thank her, and be glad she did it.

shamroc374
by New Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 11:53 PM
My MIL cleans my house every time she comes to visit. She deep cleans for me. I really appreciate it until she starts telling me things to do or when she starts griping about her back. Nobody told her to do it. She just can't sit still and relax. She has gotten better through the years and tries less and less to invade my space when she visits.
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2m2t
by on Oct. 1, 2013 at 11:54 PM


May I borrow your mother-in-law? My house is a mess (in my opinion... many people coming over would say my house is very clean because it is not cluttered and I try to clean a little when I have time) since I have been busy with lots of projects for my Master's. So, I have no idea how something like your experience would feel in normal conditions but right now I envy you and I feel like you got upset for nothing. I would really appreciate some help like you have.

Quoting Anonymous:


My husband and I were on a 4-day mini vacation and asked his parents to cat-sit.  When we got home I discovered that his mom cleaned our kitchen and vacuumed.  This really annoyed me.  I can see cleaning your sons house if he was living by himself or was younger, but my husband and I have been married 2 years, living together for 5, and he is 3-years shy of being 30.  I feel this is very intrusive, an invasion of privacy, and disrespectful as if she's saying my cleaning skills are not good enough for her son. 

Is it just me? Or would this bother anyone else?



Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 1, 2013 at 11:55 PM
My mil does that too and she rearranges. It drives me nuts. Sometimes I want to tell her that shes the one who raised a son to do nothing. This "messy" house is a direct result of you doing everything for him. But I won't say anything because her intentions are good, she's awesome and its just not worth it.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Oct. 1, 2013 at 11:59 PM

When my MIL babysits our kids at our house, I usually come home to find the place a total wreck. 

Seriously - food wrappers left where they were dropped, food ground into the carpet wherever the kids were eating it (they are all young), every toy and book strung around the place, blankets pulled out and left around, dirty dishes left where they were used, dirty clothes dropped where they were taken off, and every single treat in the house raided and given to my kids. She even leaves pee diapers laying where she takes them off, and thank god is smart enough to throw away the poopy ones. 

So my MIL doesn't babysit at our house any more. And in fact, she only babysits when I'm desperate for a sitter. But yeah, if she cleaned my house, or even just cleaned up after herself, I'd be thrilled shitless. And yes, her house is a disaster, so it's hard to send my kids there, but at least I don't have to worry that they're messing the place up. 

Firenygirl180
by Gold Member on Oct. 2, 2013 at 1:33 PM
It would only bother me because df's mom doesn't clean my way. She always puts things away in the wrong spots. But other than that I'd be thrilled to come home to a clean house.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Oct. 3, 2013 at 1:22 AM

It would bother me, absolutely! My MIL thinks I'm such a derelict at cleaning the house, she offered to pay her son to clean.. It's a definite invasion. 

Why does she even have a key to your place?

jess80
by Member on Oct. 3, 2013 at 1:48 AM
Send her my way lol
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