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Frustrating

Posted by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 12:48 AM
  • 8 Replies

It's so frustrating be pissed off at people for wronging your family for years and years and not being able to say a thing about it to them!!

And what makes it worse is when it's hubby's siblings!!

what makes it doubly worse is when your family wrongs you your husband goes off on them!!,

Gr!!  How do I get my hubby to go off on his family!?   What they do is way worse then what my family does!

okay so his family had pretty much made me feel like an outsider and unwanted since we started dating!!  Now they've ignored my kids, except when we go see them, since they were born!!  And they don't care!  They want nothing to do with us! But it took 10 freaking years for hubby to decided not to go see them anymore because of it...that's it.  Nothing more, just not going and seeing them.  Even though they are still acting like...I don't know they word.  They go to visit his sister 3000 miles away but can't come see us 300 miles away type of stuff.

but my mom starts telling me I'm a negative person etc (not trying to make me feel bad but to try and help me be better...her heart was in the right place but what I needed was support not chriticizm) and he totally goes off on her.  Which was great because she needed that and I needed him to...but WTH!!??  Wy can't he stand up for me and his children toward HIS family!,

I don't know if I should say something and tell him he can't go off on my family for anything even when they are wrong until he can go off on his family for always being wrong!!  At least my moms motives where because she was concerned for one reason or another...his family blatantly don't care!,


Married the Love of My Life 9/7/02

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by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 12:48 AM
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Replies (1-8):
MorningValley
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 12:48 AM

I want to go off on his sisters and delete them from my fb etc...but I know he'd get mad and I'd rather him do it anyway.  They already all hate me so it would just give them more leverage if it came from me!!

Baby4us09
by Rebecca on Jul. 24, 2013 at 2:18 AM
Your page. Delete them.
I would ignore them. Tell dh not to blow up on you family. soundslkeep you both need to have a heart to heart.
Azure
by Representative on Jul. 24, 2013 at 9:44 AM
I would delete them-I refuse to add DH's family to my facebook. Heck, I refuse to add my family to my facebook. I think I've got one cousin and one sister on there, and they will probably be listed, soon. I would chat with him and tell him "Great job! Now do that with your family!"
TheyAreMyLoves
by Silver Member on Jul. 24, 2013 at 9:56 AM
I refuse to add my BIL's wife on my Facebook as have his brother(who she's married to) set to where he can't see anything of mine.
They're toxic people and ugly, horrible drama seeking liars.
If it wasn't for being incredibly close to dh's other brother and his parents I'd cut them off completely.
This is my way of keeping the peace.
Family is a funny thing. We just went to a 4th of July party for my family and dh wasn't so thrilled....which I didn't understand.
But after we left I realized that in the 6 hours we were there only two people said a single word to my husband. Then it clicked.
They're assholes! Lol
We left there and went to my cousins house a 1/3 hour away and my husband had a blast talking to everyone and lettin off fireworks because THEY WERE NICE TO HIM.
Sometimes people just don't see how big of jerks their family is right away.
MorningValley
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 10:42 AM

Well it's his fb account too so I can't really delet them on my own with out him okay with it as well.  And I did say that almost exact thing when he told my mom off.  He didn't respond.  He makes up excuses for his mom that she doesn't like the drive over the mountains by herself.  Hello I don't like to do that drive at all! Especially with the kids but we have all the time!  Ug sorry.

Quoting Azure:

I would delete them-I refuse to add DH's family to my facebook. Heck, I refuse to add my family to my facebook. I think I've got one cousin and one sister on there, and they will probably be listed, soon. I would chat with him and tell him "Great job! Now do that with your family!"


MorningValley
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 10:47 AM

Lol unfortunantly my new sister in law that is pissing me off too I introduced to my brother in law lol.

ya my husband says the same thing about my family but they truely do try.  They go over and talk to him about what they have in common, business.   But they are all big into motorcycles, my entire moms side of the family except us.  So he feels out of place when it comes to that.  Lol it's not like we see me more then a few times a year even though they are an hour away lol.   So ya I don't take much stock in them either.

lol I pretty much have 200 people on my friends list and all but 25 are restricted to only public view of my page haha...which is mostly just political stuff haha.

Oh and he knows his family is this way.  We've been having this battle for 12 years now!!!!

Quoting TheyAreMyLoves:

I refuse to add my BIL's wife on my Facebook as have his brother(who she's married to) set to where he can't see anything of mine.
They're toxic people and ugly, horrible drama seeking liars.
If it wasn't for being incredibly close to dh's other brother and his parents I'd cut them off completely.
This is my way of keeping the peace.
Family is a funny thing. We just went to a 4th of July party for my family and dh wasn't so thrilled....which I didn't understand.
But after we left I realized that in the 6 hours we were there only two people said a single word to my husband. Then it clicked.
They're assholes! Lol
We left there and went to my cousins house a 1/3 hour away and my husband had a blast talking to everyone and lettin off fireworks because THEY WERE NICE TO HIM.
Sometimes people just don't see how big of jerks their family is right away.


Litlmama87
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 11:32 AM
I don't really know what you want him to do.

He can't make them like you, & as long as they're not actively making an effort to disrupt your lives and marriage, deciding not to waste anymore time and money on visiting them is reasonable.
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MorningValley
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 1:09 PM

 well when the family decides as a whole to NOT get eachother christmas presents but get all the kids presents instead....and his sister doesn't get OUR kids presents but gets her other brothers presents...then YA he should say something to her.  When we invite them to our kids birthday parties and arrange when the party is around THEIR work schedules and will pay for them to come (300miles) and they say no they don't have the time or money.  Then YA I think he should say something to them about it instead of just getting mad in private and acting like no big deal with them.  ESPECIALLY when they turn around 2 weeks later and go 3000 miles to see their older sister for her kids birthday!!!

And when they are always posting pics of them with all their other neices and nephews and spending tons of time with them when they are in town but have NEVER posted a pic of them with our kids or will spend much time with them when there around...then YA he needs to say something about it to them!

And the reason his little sister doesnt like me now and is treating us this way is a BUNCH OF BULL!  its because I was suppose to be one of her bridesmaids and 5 months before the wedding I told her I couldn't because her wedding was planned 3 weeks after my EDD for my daughter!!! 

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