Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

what should i do?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 10 Replies
Me and my fiance have been together for about 6 years and have a beautiful 3 year old daughter together. Ever since we started dating, his mom never liked me. Always gave me attitude called me a whore. Like really? She has 5 children with 4 different men and 2 dont even know their fathers. Its sad but true. As soon as i became pregnant she totally tried to keep her son from me so during my pregnancy i was alone. When i had our daughter, she never came around. She only has 2 grandkids and one is in another country so ahe never sees that child. I live one town away from her, less than 10 miles away and she cant even come visit her. I stayed with my fiance for a week after our daughter was borb and she said she was gonna take her from me and i said to hell you are and i left that same day and never spoke to her again. Should i give up trying to get my daughter to know her? I trued but it seema she wants nothing to do with her and i might be pregnant again.
Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 22, 2013 at 3:46 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 22, 2013 at 4:12 PM
1 mom liked this

Get married THEN have children.

0oSamanthaKayo0
by Member on Mar. 22, 2013 at 4:57 PM
I feel like there is a lot more to this story.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 22, 2013 at 5:44 PM
Not all ppl get married then have kids. Me and. My fiance had our daughter, she wasnt planned but we love her and are very thankful we have her


Quoting Anonymous:

Get married THEN have children.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 22, 2013 at 5:45 PM
Like what?


Quoting 0oSamanthaKayo0:

I feel like there is a lot more to this story.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 22, 2013 at 8:10 PM
3 moms liked this

I sure feel bad for you. What is your fiance's take on this? Is he a mama's boy, or is he committed to you? To be honest, that is the first thing that you need to know.

My mother in law is a wretch.(While she portrays this nice person,goes to church every sunday...she is an evil gossip, likes to spread it. She doesnt care who she hurts either.) She would smile at my face while putting the knife in my back.

 I kept trying to be nice and she kept being a butt head. My husband did speak up, several times...but he made it clear...the last time he spoke up...that I was his WIFE, I came first! He told her, not to make him choose (Which I think she did try to get him to choose her over me and that was her big mistake.) HE told her that if he had to choose, she would come out the short end of the stick. We did cut her off for a couple of years and as a condition to be around our children,she had to go to counseling.

Your MIL doesnt seem to be a stable person...when it comes to relationships. My mother in law had a lot of folks she knew but she has a hard time relating to women.

Your never going to get rid of her as long as you have children with this man. You need to acquire some coping skills. There are many books (at the library too.) that help you understand these kinds of relationships. Many give helpful tools when dealing with a person like this. Have you thought of counseling? You, your fiance, and her? 

Im at a better place with her.Not perfect, nor will it ever be. I use the tools I learned to better deal with her issues. My husband stays in my corner as I dont nag him about her. I let him "see" for himself. She has hung herself with her own rope more times than I can count.

I also remind myself that my husband has several good qualities about him. Some of those good qualities did come from her. So I keep this in mind when I get upset with her behavior.

I wish you all the best. Remember all that you have learned.... how you are treated as a daughter in law, so that someday when you are a mother in law yourself.... you will be a much better one to your kids spouse than she was to you!

Good Luck and God Bless!

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Mar. 22, 2013 at 8:23 PM

I also feel there is more. Are you and your fiance young? How can she keep her son away from you?

Quoting 0oSamanthaKayo0:

I feel like there is a lot more to this story.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 22, 2013 at 8:37 PM
20 & 21. She can be a total bitch since she raised him alone


Quoting Anonymous:

I also feel there is more. Are you and your fiance young? How can she keep her son away from you?

Quoting 0oSamanthaKayo0:

I feel like there is a lot more to this story.



Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Mar. 22, 2013 at 9:49 PM

How old are you?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 22, 2013 at 9:52 PM
21


Quoting Anonymous:

How old are you?


JustMomToSM
by Member on Mar. 23, 2013 at 3:18 PM

dear, this is hard to say:) u r so young, both of you:) and i do not say this in a mean way. it s a long way to go. i would keep my options open and, however, do what suits me best. u may change it later if u feel like it. it is very hard to change somebody (her), it is a pitty to change yourself to please her, and would be very painful to start/ work on this while your kid(s) are the ones to suffer the most. (my kid is my priority and that s where my focus is). i would go with the wind. in case you cannot take it, just don t. it s a decision both ways, so if u r open to wait for her in case she might show up, that s great. if it bugs u however, maybe it s better to read smthg on the issue or search for some counseling, like other moms said. and, in any case, it is a lesson learnt. good luck:)

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)