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The Venting Booth The Venting Booth

I have the Worst Mother in Law!!!

Posted by on Apr. 24, 2013 at 11:31 PM
  • 17 Replies

Where to start..... recently she lied to my 4year old, which we taught her not to do, so when my daughter called her a liar, she told my husband it was my fault. She told my daughter she would buy her a dresser and came the next week to tell my husband she wasn't going to get it, so that monday my daughter and i went to go buy one, i told her "i'm not sure why grammy can't get you one but lets pick one out" so my daughter put it together and called her a liar, she had the nerve to pick my daughter up and say "did mommy tell you that daddy told me i couldn't get it for you because it's to big" after she left i called my husband in disbelief and he said no she canceled the order, so talk about lies!!!! So stressful, especially because i'm due next month so were trying to get the rooms settle and she isn't helping, so we told her just to stay away and not to text/call or come by because of the stress so she decides to constantly text me even though i don't reply back, i have no idea how not to stress about it. Oh yea my husband is white and I am mexican, so as you know my daughter is mixed and his mother likes to call my race them people and say their entertainment and I have no idea what to say or how to handle that!!!!! 

by on Apr. 24, 2013 at 11:31 PM
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Replies (1-10):
aodom323
by Member on Apr. 24, 2013 at 11:39 PM
3 moms liked this

well if your race is them people call her race in front of her those crazy white people and if she wants to talk about entertainment tell her to check out trash tv she will soon realize it is all crazy white people, you never see mexicans on there. :)  I'm white and am totally cool with this idea.  See how she likes it when the shoe is on the other foot.  

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Apr. 25, 2013 at 12:06 AM
2 moms liked this

I do have the worse mother in law as well. first of all, she didn't allow me to pick out my own wedding dress 25 yrs ago when I got married to her son. she chose a dress I did not want to wear since it had a crinoline and I did not want a crinoline or huge puffy shoulder sleeves, yet that is the dress she chose the dress and told me that if I was going to show up at MY wedding with the dress I had in mind, she would leave and do everything she could to end the wedding at all cost. she even chose the SIZE of my dress. THIS IS TRUE. I take size 5 or 6 in dresses (always have since I was 17 yrs old), she chose size 3 (and I was pregnant at my wedding and just started to show too for god sake). Talk about dumb. I didn't want anything too tight because I didn't want to hurt my unborn baby and it's not like I wanted to hide my pregnancy (I was 23 yrs old when I got married and everyone knew I was pregnant, since I was happy about it), so it was no secret to anyone. I'm French and at the time, my english was not too good, so I had a very hard time explaining myself to my husband and tell him I didn't appreciate his mother choosing my wedding dress and the size too, but he didn't understand what I was saying to him, so nothing was done about it and I had to go along with the stupid looking dress. Thank God she let me choose the colour I had always wanted to be married in (blue). Needless to say I had to get alterations on my dress since I was growing due to my pregnancy and the day before my wedding I had the last alteration done and I still had a hard time zipping up the dress. She also had to nerve to start inviting all her personal friends whom I didn't know and when she called and told me she was inviting a certain person she knew me and my husband didn't like or want at the wedding I told her it was my wedding and not hers and that the person she was talking about was not to show up. She got all pissy with me and you know what, I didn't even care. She also started lying to my kids, promising to take them out for lunch or shopping for clothes and never did, while my kids were waiting at home for grandma to show up and her not bothering showing up. She always had something better to do or someone else better than my kids to take out. She moved away when my son was just over a year old and her promises were all broken each time she came for a visit. Once, she invited us to a get together cause someone said something to her, but she ignored me the whole evening and took tons of pictures of my husband with another girl and only one with me and my husband, but of course she put me behind my husband and the other girl whom she has always wanted as a daughter in law. She has always put me down and talked bad about me to everyone she knows and never listened to the rules of our house which are NO SMOKING IN MY HOUSE, yet she always smoked in our place and that made me angry. Now, when she calls my house, I give the phone to my husband without saying a word to her. she is not worth my time and energy. I know for a fact she hates me because I'm French and I speak for myself and stand my grounds when people talk trash to me or my kids, I don't let anyone bully me anymore. and she hates the fact that I'm a stay at home mom. 

your race does not define who you are in your heart. you are doing the right thing by speaking up and letting her know how you feel and not allowing her to visit, call or text. hopefully she will realize she is hurting you and your daughter when she breaks promises constantly. you don't need to be stressed all the time. best of luck :-) *hugs* 

jessz1303
by New Member on Apr. 25, 2013 at 12:46 AM
I would be so mad if I had to wear a dress I didn't want to, she did give me her dress and told me I could wear it, but I just kept it in the closet. I'm trying my best not to stress over her, especially done with trying to be the nice person with no back bone. I know how you feel about that other girl, she Texts my husband (her son) about his first still and she has giving me the pictures of his homecoming with his first and I just smiled. I am trying my best but I know the best thing is for her to stay away, wish I would have seen it a long time ago.
jessz1303
by New Member on Apr. 25, 2013 at 12:49 AM
1 mom liked this

I tell my husband why is she like that and he tells me she is the cheerleader type that says whatever it is to bring the other person down no matter what it takes and doesn't ever think about it. She once told him take ur daughter to the Mexicans and he told her its better than your kind and I just smiled inside like yes, since I didn't want to say anything mean because she isn't my mom.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 25, 2013 at 7:42 AM
2 moms liked this

grow a thick skin, and let your dd know that grandma says things she doesn't mean, and eventually, grandma will lose the respect of her granddaughter...unf, grandma will have to learn the hard way.  and if your dh can't stand up for YOU, then he's a wimp with no backbone, and you'll have to decide how it's going to affect your marriage in the long run...do you want your dd to see you with a spineless man who can't stand up for his wife n kids?  

And, change your phone number, that way she can't text you nonstop

MomTiara19
by Member on Apr. 25, 2013 at 8:43 AM

Im sorry you are going through a time with your MIL.

I am black,my dh white,and let me tell you your MIL sounds like a saint next to mine....lol...

I could write a book!

All your mil did was not get your daughter a dresser,got angry because she was called a liar by her gran-daughter(which is probably disrespectful to her generation),and call to check on you(annoying but caring) and she is bad?Now the "them people(mexican)"comment wouldnt fly with me either.....and I would call her out on that.

I have been married over 13 years and my kids are now 13 and 21.For your families sake try to keep the peace.Everyone should respect boundaries including her.Just know part of loving your dh and kids is getting along with MIL.Try to let her nonsense roll off your back and keep the focus on your lovely growing family:)

Blessings,Tia

mommieof38829
by Member on Apr. 25, 2013 at 8:49 AM
Sounds like you need to mil to go screw herself. I wouldn't put up with a crazy like that. I don't have to deal a mil, dh hasn't spoken with his crazy in years. But I did have to deal with a traffling old granny which I cut her out of our lives. If she keeps it up, you might need to do the same. Change your number I changed dh so his granny couldn't call begging for food or Mcdondalds
theresa1966
by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 9:23 AM

My ex-MIL pretty much drove me to divorce my ex-husband. He would never stand up for me. His mother is a Johov witness. They don't do holidays. But she wanted us there for them. Well I talked to someone I know who is same type of church. She told me I need to talk to that church and say that she is doing holidays....Well I never called...I laughed ...I got a call 3 months later...she was called out in front of her church about her gathering with family on holidays....HAHAHA.....the woman that I talked to I didnt know he was the pastor of her church.....

mysticalmalissa
by Silver Member on Apr. 25, 2013 at 9:38 AM

wow...

AnnieMcD
by Bronze Member on Apr. 25, 2013 at 12:42 PM
1 mom liked this
I would punish my child for speaking disrespectfully to an adult. Whether or not your MIL broke her promise, it's not appropriate for your 4 year old to call any adult a liar. Perhaps she had adult reasons why she had to cancel the order, which she discussed with another adult. She should not have to explain herself to a pre-schooler.
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