SILs pregnant and I'm not supposed to know. Just a bit of a whine.
Today my DH's cousin Lisa came over to hang out for a little while before she had to pick her DD up from school. At some point during our conversation, she said, "I have a secret to tell you, but you have to swear not to say a word!" So, I asked her what it was and she told me that my SIL is about four weeks pregnant but isn't "announcing" until the 12 week mark. The only reason Lisa knew is because my MIL immediately texted her when she found out (MIL is the ONLY person SIL told). Apparently, my MIL informed Lisa not to tell anyone (aka: Me) because it's a secret until week 12. WTF?! It's a secret from me, but not Lisa?
I am transitioning back and forth between angry and extremely hurt. I know this might not seem like a big deal to some, but you'd have to understand our dynamics.
First of all, my SIL's fiance is my cousin (who is like a brother to me). They've been together since before I ever even met DH. That's actually how I met him, SIL was with my cousin and she decided to hook me up with her brother. So, this child-to-be is not only my husband's blood, but mine also. My MIL and I are very close. I guess I overestimated our relationship, though, because she purposefully excluded me from this news but went right to DH's cousin. That doesn't make a bit of sense. Am I not considered trustworthy enough to keep a secret? Obviously Lisa isn't very much, because she told me the first chance she got and she's also told her husband. SIL has no clue that Lisa, her DH and myself know about her pregnancy. I was told by Lisa that MIL and SIL definitely did not want me to know because they think I'm going to tell my aunt (the child's GRANDMOTHER!!!) No, I'm not going to completely obliterate my aunt's heart by telling her, "Hey, you're gonna be a grandma and you're the last to know!" I would NEVER announce someone else's pregnancy or any secret, regardless. It's not my place.
I am upset with MIL. She shouldn't have told anyone, period. But, the fact that she went right to Lisa directly after hanging up the phone with SIL makes my blood boil. It's like a smack in the face. Where does this woman get the impression that I would run around telling everyone about this? I've never done anything like that before. Kinda crazy, because Lisa did what MIL's assuming I'll do. Whatever.
I just want to make it clear before I submit this that I do understand it is the mother and father's right to decide when to announce and to whom. This post isn't about that. I am NOT upset with SIL. She simply confided in her mother. I just can't believe MIL doesn't trust me after all this time.