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What would you do if your 18 yr old told you she was pregnant?

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My 18 yr old informed me she's having a baby.   While I would have preferred her being married first, then getting pregnant, I am excited to become a grandma by blood for the first time (I have 9 inherited grandchildren).  Problem is his parents don't think they should get married.  They have been dating for almost 2 yrs and had already talked about getting engaged.  Am I wrong in thinking that they should get married?  Any advice is welcome.

by on Sep. 18, 2013 at 1:24 AM
Replies (51-55):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Sep. 20, 2013 at 2:09 AM
I've been there... My daughter got pregnant at 18, and I now have a beautiful 2 year old grandson :) Her boyfriend (now ex) disappeared when she found out she was pregnant. They had been together for over 2 years when she got pregnant, and had planned on eventually getting married. He ran & we haven't seen him since. He's never met his son, or paid a penny in child support. My advice is to support your daughter through it all. If they want to get married, fine. If not, I really don't think its necessary. Seems like most young people getting married these days don't stay married for long. They are going to be going through a lot of changes in the next year, so adding in a wedding & marriage may be too much right now. Good luck to you all & enjoy that grand baby!!
sharon6345
by Bronze Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 2:57 AM

My daughter just turned 19 and just lost her child a few months ago. No way was I ever going to make my child get married. not in this lifetime. I was going to be the very best grandma I could be. teaching her how to do the very best job she could. If the father was there good if not even better. my daughter would have gone back to school and I would be the nanny. I am hoping you love your child enough to know marriage should not be in the equation right now. 

kailu1835
by Bronze Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 3:01 AM
I would be happy for her.

Do THEY want to get married? Because really, that's the only thing that matters.
baileymarie723
by Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 10:36 AM
I wouldn't push marriage on them. I would let them decide on their own when they wanted to get married. There was time when people were shunned for not being married before having a baby, but it is so common now that I think it should just be the choice of the couple. Being forced into marriage when they aren't ready could make for a higher chance of divorce down the road.
catrig
by Silver Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 1:05 PM

I'd let her make her own decision.  People shouldn't get married just because of a baby.

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