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The Venting Booth The Venting Booth

Yes, Breastfeeding Is Why My Husband is Lazy!

Posted by on Mar. 7, 2014 at 7:41 PM
  • 15 Replies

So, even as I type this, I am getting bitched at because I've been watching our kid all day and I want his daddy to take a turn so I can get a break. My father in law, of course, is saying me breastfeeding is the reason my husband is lazy when it comes to his kid. Um...really? You wanna know why I breastfed in the beginning? Because my husband did not want to get up and fix him bottles. He was colicky and hardly slept the first three months. I did not have the prescence of mind to get up ever two hours to fix bottles.

Elliot nurses twice a day, if even that. And yet, my breastfeeding is why my husband is lazy? Yeah, that makes perfect sense. I should know better than to open my mouth in this damn house. I can't say a damn thing here without getting yelled out.

Oh, and apparently breastfeeding is "wrong." I watch our kid, by myself, all day because he goes to work with me. I can't trust anyone in this house to watch him while I babysit. So, explain to me how I am in the wrong here? I don't understand why I am the one who gets bitched at.

It's my body. If I want to breastfeed, I am damn well doing to. It isn't anyone else's damn buisness what I do with my son and my body. I know he is almost two years old and I am trying to wean him. It doesn't help that NO ONE will help me with him during the day. If mommy is there, he is going to want the boob and I am not going to sit there and let him scream while I'm trying to watch the other kid I'm babysitting as well.

Oh, and did I mention the fact that my husband brought up the idea of having another kid when my son turns two...which will be in three months? I do not think so. I am staying on birth control and I am NOT having another kid until my husband grows the fuck up and starts helping. There is no way in hell I would be able to handle a two year old and a crying newborn. No thank you!

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by on Mar. 7, 2014 at 7:41 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Mar. 8, 2014 at 4:11 AM

maybe tell your DH to shape up or ship out. I'm sorry that most men feel so entitled and self absorbed. they think the first few years of parenting are the moms job, and the fun years is their job, then once the kid hits teenager its primarily a mom job again. gr. good luck. if i were you i would make it clear you dont NEED him to raise a kid. you WANT himt o be involved, and WANT him to be responsible, but you can obviously do things with out him. you sound like a good mama, keep your chin up

JenniferMiller0
by Bronze Member on Mar. 8, 2014 at 11:20 AM


Quoting Anonymous:

maybe tell your DH to shape up or ship out. I'm sorry that most men feel so entitled and self absorbed. they think the first few years of parenting are the moms job, and the fun years is their job, then once the kid hits teenager its primarily a mom job again. gr. good luck. if i were you i would make it clear you dont NEED him to raise a kid. you WANT himt o be involved, and WANT him to be responsible, but you can obviously do things with out him. you sound like a good mama, keep your chin up

Thanks. I guess he thinks because mommy is around, he doesn't need to do anything. When this babysitting job runs out in August, I WILL be leaving the baby home with him while I find a "real" job. He is going to get a rude awakening of how hard it is to take care of a toddler alone. Sure, my father in law is willing to help but he has made it clear to my husband that he will HELP...not do it all so my husband can sleep.


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Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 8, 2014 at 5:13 PM
1 mom liked this

Keep doing what you're doing, and for goodness sake, ignore the FIL. There is nothing wrong with breastfeeding a two year old. Trying to blame something random for DH's laziness is just ridiculous. Maybe if DH had parents who didn't make excuses for his bad behavior he would have grown up to be a better man. Don't let the idiots get you down, and definitely don't have more kids with this guy until he decides to join the world as an involved father.

JenniferMiller0
by Bronze Member on Mar. 8, 2014 at 6:15 PM


Quoting Anonymous:

Keep doing what you're doing, and for goodness sake, ignore the FIL. There is nothing wrong with breastfeeding a two year old. Trying to blame something random for DH's laziness is just ridiculous. Maybe if DH had parents who didn't make excuses for his bad behavior he would have grown up to be a better man. Don't let the idiots get you down, and definitely don't have more kids with this guy until he decides to join the world as an involved father.

Oh, I have already told my husband that I will NOT be having more kids anytime soon. First of all, I don't think we could afford another at the moment anyway. Secondly, he doesn't help with the one he's got.


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bbyB10
by on Mar. 8, 2014 at 7:08 PM

 that really stinks , I also bf our 2 year old and daddy still gets up to mak her a bottle if she cries for one , he always has, he is actually the one that has also gotten up and the middle of the night then and now , he stays up with her if shes sick etc. IDK what I would do I honestly wouldn't put up with it

JenniferMiller0
by Bronze Member on Mar. 8, 2014 at 7:56 PM

I know. I am tired all the time! This is the exact reason he hasn't gotten "any" in the past two months



Quoting bbyB10:

 that really stinks , I also bf our 2 year old and daddy still gets up to mak her a bottle if she cries for one , he always has, he is actually the one that has also gotten up and the middle of the night then and now , he stays up with her if shes sick etc. IDK what I would do I honestly wouldn't put up with it


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bbyB10
by on Mar. 8, 2014 at 8:01 PM
1 mom liked this

 

Quoting JenniferMiller0:

I know. I am tired all the time! This is the exact reason he hasn't gotten "any" in the past two months

 

 

Quoting bbyB10:

 that really stinks , I also bf our 2 year old and daddy still gets up to mak her a bottle if she cries for one , he always has, he is actually the one that has also gotten up and the middle of the night then and now , he stays up with her if shes sick etc. IDK what I would do I honestly wouldn't put up with it

 

 my baby thinks daddy is hers she hits me, pulls my hair and pinches me , if we are trying to be sneaky while she's sleeping she will wake up , we co sleep with her but trying to get her in her own bed soon

CalamityJayne
by on Mar. 8, 2014 at 8:48 PM

hows about the fact that breastfeeding makes the baby more attached to you, thus making your husband feel useless?

LeKendria
by on Mar. 8, 2014 at 9:24 PM

I agree that whether you breastfeed or bottle feed he should help you with your son. He's just lazy period!

JenniferMiller0
by Bronze Member on Mar. 8, 2014 at 10:54 PM


Quoting CalamityJayne:

hows about the fact that breastfeeding makes the baby more attached to you, thus making your husband feel useless?

When he was younger, sure. But my son will be turning 2 in june. there is plenty he could be doing to help me out. He could give elliot a bath, feed him, take him outside if mommy gets a headache. I'm prone to migraines and my husband knows this. Instead of taking the baby and letting me take a nap, the only thing that helps, he refuses to and then wonders why i eventually snap and go off on him.


My son nurses once,maybe twice a day.He does nurses more at night though.

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