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my husbabd went on a vacation without me

Posted by Anonymous
  • 36 Replies
I dont know how to deal with this. Background: this is both of our 2nd marriages, i have 2 children ages 12 & 13, his is 14. my husband asked me at the beginning of the year if i thought it was ok for him to go with his grandpa to vegas and california so his gpa could see his sister. I of course said yes, then after plans got underway, i asked him if i could go too. Thought itd be a great opportunity to go where I've never been. I said i would pay my own way, his gpa was paying for him. Everything was a go except,nothing was booked yet. Then after a week or 2 his gpa decided he better not go. Ok no big deal. A few weeks after that, he decided to go again. Next thing i get is a text message from my husband with dates, flights etc and nothing about me going, when i asked, he said it was going to just be them 2. My heart was broken. I dont know if i know the entire truth yet, but he told me that his gpa cant quite figure me out?? Idk what that means, so i take it as well i was pry the reason he canceled before and im sure he didnt want me to go an made that clear to my husband. Im so heartbroken, i dont really have many people that don't like me. I dontknowhow to handle this. Ive made my feelings clear to my husband that i never thought he would treat me this way or even let someone else. When my husband was asked by people why i wasnt going, he tokd them it didnt work out with my job. I have about 3 weeks of vaca to take.

Here is the other issue, my husband is on his 4th vaca since december. Hes gone hunting for a week, a pool tournament another week and we went on a family skiing vaca. We have talked about going to vegas since we got together and they hasn't happened yet. He and i have only stayed away out of town 2 nights together in the last 5 years.

I think im extremely jealous because hes always gone and gets to do things. Financially, im the bread winner so to say, so its not even a situstion where he feels he works harder and is entitled. We share our money. I guess i need to find away to get over this, hes been gone for 3 days already abd my anger or hurt hasnt subsided.
Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 30, 2014 at 9:01 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by Member on Mar. 30, 2014 at 9:12 PM
9 moms liked this

I'm sorry this is happening to you. That sucks.  From my third party perspective this seems really suspicious. Is he cheating on you?  Why don't you call his gpa and talk to him, see what this trip is really about. 

You should be hurt and angry. He is your husband and should be spending vacations with you.  sharing your lives and making memories - that's what marriage is all about. 

by New Member on Mar. 30, 2014 at 9:41 PM
2 moms liked this

Sounds like you need and deserve a girls get away or at lease some pampering!

I couldn't imagine my hubby ever going on vacation with out me! I've gone with out him though (hated being away from him). The first time I went with a friend who won a trip and the others were with my mom, and he didn't want to go.

by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 30, 2014 at 9:56 PM
6 moms liked this

DH and I have both been on vacations without the other person over the years. Some were planned, others weren't (ie funerals).

As for your situation, something doesn't seem quite right. If you're getting that weird felling, call his grandfather yourself and talk to him. He may have the right to go on a vacation without you, but you've got the right to know when the wool is being pulled over your eyes.

by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 30, 2014 at 10:26 PM
Im the original poster.... thing is i completely trust him. I know he is there with his gpa and with his gpas sister. I dont have trust issues i know he is loyal to me that way. We are so close and loving with each other i think thats why im so heartbroken by this.
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 30, 2014 at 10:33 PM
1 mom liked this
I wouldn't think he's cheating, I think your original thought was correct.

I don't think his gpa is wrong to not invite you.

I'm sorry you're upset.

Things can't be fair all the time.

However, If I were you, I'd probably take a week of vacation by myself while he's gone. You'd still have 2 weeks left afterward that you can spend with your husband later.

Pamper and enjoy yourself, mama!
by Bronze Member on Mar. 30, 2014 at 10:40 PM
2 moms liked this

You're a doormat.  He doesn't want to take you. Plan a trip while he's gone. If you keep waiting for him you'll always be home. 

by Bronze Member on Mar. 30, 2014 at 10:47 PM
2 moms liked this

 Blaring red lights went off reading this. 

Doesn't sound right. Not at all in any way, shape, or form to me.

by Anonymous 4 on Mar. 30, 2014 at 11:20 PM
5 moms liked this

If you're not sharing vacations, I'd stop sharing money.

by Member on Mar. 30, 2014 at 11:37 PM
Go on a vacation without him. I'd be in Vegas this weekend blowing off some steam or fly down to cabo and be on the beach or something. If he can do all these vacas without you and treat you like an option so can you. I mean the extremely disrespectful part is him pussyfooting around you and not being straightforward about it all.
by Anonymous 5 on Mar. 31, 2014 at 12:23 AM

I think you're being too sensitive about it. My DH just went on vacation with his fam for the week for spring break. Im not butt hurt about it. hell, I wasn't invited and couldn't go even if i was because his gram is my boss and Im working for her the entire time she's gone. It could be just as simple as a family only thing.

If you have no trust issues then don't worry about it. He will be excited to see you when he gets back. Find some YOU time and do something to pamper yourself.

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