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The Venting Booth The Venting Booth

I dont want my mom here!!!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 76 Replies

Last  year I invited my mom to move in with me, bill free so that she could concentrate on getting herself out of debt. My mom has health issues and I wanted to help her.

She offered totake care of dd, but thenI found out that my son was actually watching her when he wasnt in school. He was 12.

She brought home a puppy WITHOUT asking me -  but she was always too tired to take care of the puppy so my son would do EVERYTHING, potty training, feeding, bathing, and cleaning up the crate and accidents. When I found out I made my mom give up the dog- she was mad at me. 

She would leave the Kitchen light on and turn on all burners to the stove, plus the oven cause she was cold and cause a huge bill which i couldnt pay and we wnded up getting evicted cause i got ovewhelmed. She was mad at me when this happened. when I would try to ask my mom not to do certain things, she would argue with me and do it anyways.

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I have my own apt again, two month ago she asked to move in a couple of peices of furniture and to stay one week so she can go to school, I agreed. 1 week and a half passed,  she said " well I guess I moved in" and just laughed. she'll buy $30.00 of food here or there, but that's it. She's not trying to find work. and she complains about my house all the time. She says it's ugly and she hates it. She whines about everything and everyone. I cant watch what I want cause she doesn't approve of it. and she secretly tries to under mind me on how I raise or discipline dd. 

The other day while dd was eating breakfast my mom loudly said that she "HATES BLACK PEOPLE, THEY ARE LAZY AND CANT DO ANYTHING RIGHT!" she even hates Latinos, which is especially sad cause that's what we are. I told her NOT to bring that hatred around my dd. 

Everywhere she's lived, she's paid some kind of bill even with my siblings,but all she says to me is "I'll help you when I get on my feet"

She left my sister's house cause she "HATES" my BIL, ( for reasons that are her own fault) My sister has asked her to go back but she wont.

My sister tells me to just bless her and help her. My friends say that she takes advantage of me and runs over me. and I agree with them. 

Tell me, if it was your mom , what would you do? would you ask her to leave? ( my friends say I should) or just deal with her? Am I being a brat and overreacting?  I really don't want her there.




Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:43 PM
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Replies (1-10):
jazzieel1
by New Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:49 PM

Maybe tell her if she can't pay you can not aford for her to live with you. Give her a set time that she has to pay you or move out. In my case I would have no problem telling my mom no in the first place to living with us. But then we both know we are to different and it would never work. Truthfully I love my mom because she is my mom. But more than 10 mins. with her and I want to scream. She drives me crazy. I am not one for gossiping or  don't wanting to hear it. She gossips almost constantly. It drives the entire family crazy!

jslpruitt
by Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:51 PM
3 moms liked this

 I think she over stayed her welcome, ask her to leave.

onethentwins
by Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 5:00 PM
1 mom liked this

She needs to go. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 3, 2014 at 5:07 PM
1 mom liked this

The reason why I have a hard time asking her to leave is because, other then with my sister, (which she absolutly refuses to go) she has nowhere else to go. and like you, i do love her, and I dont want her on the street, but I dont want her at my house either.  this is why i'm so torn,  I dont want to hurt her feelings, My brother was murdered 2 1/2 yrs ago, the last thing i want is for her to feel unloved or hurt by her own child, but I just feel like she is taking advantage of me. and she is so prideful that if I do tell her, she is capable of moving out and sleeping in her car. 

Quoting jazzieel1:

Maybe tell her if she can't pay you can not aford for her to live with you. Give her a set time that she has to pay you or move out. In my case I would have no problem telling my mom no in the first place to living with us. But then we both know we are to different and it would never work. Truthfully I love my mom because she is my mom. But more than 10 mins. with her and I want to scream. She drives me crazy. I am not one for gossiping or  don't wanting to hear it. She gossips almost constantly. It drives the entire family crazy!


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 3, 2014 at 5:10 PM

I agree. But I feel like a horrible person. 

Quoting jslpruitt:

 I think she over stayed her welcome, ask her to leave.


jslpruitt
by Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 5:12 PM

 She will prob be angry with you, but I dont think it makes you a bad person, just sit down and tell her you cant afford her. she needs to leave

Quoting Anonymous:

I agree. But I feel like a horrible person. 

Quoting jslpruitt:

 I think she over stayed her welcome, ask her to leave.

 

 

lilmoosesmom
by Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 5:12 PM
Tell her to leave. Now. Mother or not.
lilmoosesmom
by Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 5:13 PM
Tell her to leave. Now. Mother or not.
RADmomma
by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 5:14 PM
4 moms liked this
She's the reason you were evicted last time... I wouldn't have let her move in the second time. But I definitely wouldn't let her continue to stay.

She needs to grow up.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 3, 2014 at 5:17 PM
5 moms liked this

She'd get a 30 day notice and never be allowed in my home again. You feel badly because you unfortunately have a manipulative, toxic mother . She has you feeling this way when in reality you've already bent over backwards for her and she's in the wrong. She needs to go.

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