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The Venting Booth The Venting Booth

WHAT IN THE FREAKING HECK?!?! DO NOT EXPECT ME TO....

Posted by on Apr. 15, 2014 at 12:37 AM
  • 18 Replies

My DH and I have been trying for our first for almost a year now.  We have had 4 miscarriages.  Today my in laws called me and told me that DH's older Sister is Pregnant with her 5th.  I broke down.  We have been trying for a year and she had sex one time and BOOM she's pregnant.  Would it be wrong of me to not go to family functions if she is going to be there?  I don't think that emotionaly I could handle it.

by on Apr. 15, 2014 at 12:37 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Apr. 15, 2014 at 12:47 AM
Lol wow
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 15, 2014 at 1:20 AM

DO IT MORE OFTEN AND THEN KEEP BOTTOM UP FOR 30 MINUTES WITH PILLOWS UNDER YOU...I'D WAIT 6 MORE MONTHS THEN BOTH YOU AND HUSBAND BOTH GET TESTED....T COULD BE "HIM" AND NOT YOU................THAT HAPPENED TO MY DD..AFTER DR'S FOR 2-3 YEARS.....SHE FINALLY HAD IVF DONE..AND THAT TOOK YEARS......6 TOTAL..

SORRY I KNOW IT DOESNT EVER SEEM FAIR..BUT YOU'LL GET YOUR BABY SOON....STOP STRESSING AND WORRYNG AND YOULL GET PREGNANT.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Apr. 15, 2014 at 1:32 AM

No, it would not be wrong. I hope you have a full-term, healthy and happy baby soon. 

sarahfaith123
by Member on Apr. 15, 2014 at 4:58 AM
No it's not wrong, I bet they'd understand. Hope it happens for you very soon, try to relax In the meantime
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Apr. 15, 2014 at 5:51 AM

no it wouldn't be wrong. but it might be seen as slightly bitter. its not her fault you have suffered 4 miscarriages and its not her fault you have been trying for a year unsucsessfully. 

don't let the understandable but needless bitterness get in your way. just keep trying, you will get there eventually. be happy for DH sister. im not saying go and throw her a bby shower but dont avoid her. as i aid its not her fault.


do you track ovulation? not on a calander but with OPK'S? you might be just missing your ovulation window when you have sex. or you may not be ovulating when you think you are. 


anyway best wishes and i have my fingers crossed for you. try not worry about concieving. anxiety worry and stress all affect ovulation.

Tasha911471
by Member on Apr. 15, 2014 at 5:56 AM

Yes, I feel to miss every event were they are is a little rude it is not her fault that you are not pregnant . I know you are hurting now but, hurting someone else by not being there is just as bad. I am not saying you have to go to everything but, I would encourage you to remember that there child will need an aunt and you are going to want them to be there if you fall pregnant . A friend of mine had a child after her sister had been trying for years , her mom had died two years before and the sister wanted nothing to do with her because she could not fall pregnant. She felt alone and sad with only her husband to share the joy of this child. Fast forward to today they do get along but, the sister never did fall pregnant and instead of trying to share in the joys of this babies beginning they are trying to make up time . If she had only had tried to open her heart to this child both the mom and child may have had less troubles and she could have been an almost second mum to this child and at least experienced the new born age even if it was not hers. I wish you luck and I hope you will have your own bundle of joy soon .

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Apr. 15, 2014 at 6:00 AM

I don't mean to upset you further but ... do your doctors know why you keep miscarrying?

tamikadorch26
by on Apr. 15, 2014 at 6:14 AM

Be happy for her. My sister in law was just like this. She lost so many and was suppose to have her kids around the times I had mine. I felt sad for her but she always was happy for me and her brother. She was 5 months along when they had to take the baby. This was the longest she ever has carried. You could see inside of the baby and he was so tiny. Family stayed coming and going to see him. They had to operated on him a lot but he made it. Now he is a bad ass three years old little boy who plays drums, sings church music, and did I say bad. He don't even look like he was a early baby. Point is that God will bless you with a child when he is ready. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Apr. 15, 2014 at 6:25 AM
I've been in your position. My ex husband and I tried for 6 years, to no avail. Imho, I think it is rude to cut out all family functions. It is not her fault that she was able to become pregnant quickly.
Canadiana
by Member on Apr. 15, 2014 at 7:01 AM

It's ok if you were just skipping her shower or something like that.  It's not ok to avoid her altogether... Think of how you would feel if she did that once you get pregnant.... and 1 year is actually not all that long... sorry for your losses though.

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