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Over payment on Child Support - recourse?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 57 Replies

When the CS was calculated, the BM was making a lot less than BF.  BF was ordered to pay the majority of the daycare costs in addition to CS.  The child is now 7 and hasn't been in full time day care for 2 years now, but the daycare costs are still in the CS order.  

BF isn't sure if he wants to have his order evaluated because he makes more now than he did then and is afraid it will go up (it's already around $950 a month), but her income is higher now than it was then by nearly 10k and he has another child that is with him full-time as well that will be factored into the equation.

My thought is that if it goes up, then it goes up - but at least it isn't higher by fraud - BM knows her kid isn't in daycare anymore and didn't inform the CS office of the change.

Long story, but BF is not involved with the child, never has been, and never intends to be.  He made BM well aware of that and she let him know she didn't care as long as she got her money (pregnancy resulted from a stupid mistake of trusting a woman who says 'oh that's okay' when he says 'i don't have a condom' during a two week fling.)

1.  He's making about 10k more a year as well - but has had another child since then - do you think that will 'cancel' the income increase?  - In our state, it doesn't matter which child came first - they are both calculated as needing support, so it doesn't take the first into account and assume he'll use whatever is leftover to support #2.

2. Is there any punishment that would befall the BM for collecting daycare costs  as part of CS when there was no daycare?

 

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 29, 2014 at 3:31 PM
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 29, 2014 at 10:51 PM
6 moms liked this

I like how you try to act like the pregnancy was all the bm's fault. He was also aware of what could happen as a result of not wearing a condom. It doesn't matter if he doesn't want anything to do with the child. It doesn't make the bm a bad person for wanting financial help. You picked a winner lady. Also what state are you in that they lower it because of other children? I have always heard that it doesn't affect the amount a man has to pay. Why would it? How is that fair that a man can't keep his dick in his pants or figure out how to use condoms so they penalize the other children for it? I don't think they do that in any state. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Apr. 29, 2014 at 11:14 PM
1 mom liked this

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Yep. Pretty much hope you go back and they take every cent he earns. You sound like a real gem.

Purgatorian
by Bronze Member on Apr. 30, 2014 at 12:08 AM
Yep stopped caring when you spat out the part with him not being involved because he couldn't cover his shit or say no.

What a gem.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Apr. 30, 2014 at 8:30 AM
If he is paying over the amount, just leave it like that until and if the child support gets raised. Also they can't take over half his check..
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Apr. 30, 2014 at 9:27 AM
Consult a lawyer if you really want to know. My df is getting his lowered. But he makes a lil less now but his x claimed no work last time they went. She has fancy new cars. Bought a house ect on her 'no income'. His lawyer did a calculation n his cs should be cut in half on what she makes. (He's never bothered to lower it but loses literally 50% of his weekly income now and he works so much OT so we can stay ontop).

If he has the money a simple consult could figure it out for him. Especially if you have an idea of both incomes.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 30, 2014 at 10:05 AM
5 moms liked this

I really don't care who thinks he's wrong for making a choice to pay the support he's legally obligated to pay but having no involvement.  Is it all her fault for getting pregnant?  Nope.  Is it only her fault that she had a child?  Yup - she had a choice - he didn't.  In fact, she had already exercised her choice to choose by having two abortions, one child she kept, and one disabled child she gave up for adoption before she became pregnant with this one.  The BF on the other hand had a planned child from his first marriage with the only other person he had slept with before meeting the BM.  Stupid yes - but it wasn't as if he was just spreading his seed all over town with no regard for the consequences.  He made one mistake. If he had the opportunity to have an abortion, he would have. If he was able to give the child up for adoption, he would have - the law doesn't allow him the same means of 'getting out of pregnancy' that it gives to women - the law tells a woman it is okay if you spread your legs without thinking because we'll give you a choice to relieve yourself of all parental obligation and women cheer on screaming 'our body our rights' yadda yadda - in the same breath they condemn a man saying if he didn't want a baby, he shouldn't have had sex and things like 'I hope they take every cent he earns' because he didn't want to have a baby with her...

The BF isan amazing and involved father to his first child, his step-children, and to his youngest child - children he was given a choice to create and support - children that were not forced upon him for monitary gain.  He's a fantastic husband, a hard-worker, a really nice guy who made a mistake. Hell, after reading about all these horrible lazy demanding husbands on here, he's a freaking dream guy.  He was always upfront with BM about the fact that he was not going to participate in parenting - and she repeated that she didn't care if he was or not.  He has never tried to get out of his financial obligation  - he pays and has paid every month since the child was born which is more than I can say about many of the BF on here who plan and create multiple children, float in and out of their lives, and do their best to not support them. He has never tried to interefere with the BM's life - she married someone shortly after the child was born and that SF is the one who the child knows as 'dad'  (until it comes to collect the money).  He should not be penalized for wanting to move on with his life and have another child with his wife that he fully planned and intends on raising anymore than a woman should not be prevented from marrying and having other children after giving a child up for adoption (a move that would earn her 'saint' status). 

  You think he doesn't feel badly about having made the stupid mistake in the first place?   Go find all the women who had abortions and gave their children  up for adoption and tell them that you hope they become financially destitute and aren't allowed to move on with their life.  Seriously.  

All I wanted to know was if a CS order includes daycare costs and there is no daycare costs, would that woman be penalized for fraudulently collecting money she wasn't entitled to....you really think she should be entitled to extra money just because she had unprotected sex?  If you didn't have any actual advice to contribute, why contribute at all?

aheasley
by on Apr. 30, 2014 at 11:23 AM

There should be a child support calculator for your state. Look it up and put in the numbers you know. You can guess at the rest. As far as the child care cost he is not likely to get that back if he knew the child was no longer attending day care and he did not file for a change of circumstance. Both parents an obligation to report changes and have the support updated. However if this is something he is just now learning about he might have a good argument for reimbursement. It really depends on your state.

NDADanceMom
by on Apr. 30, 2014 at 11:48 AM
5 moms liked this

I think its super funny when the new woman is so worried about the money.  Uhh heres a solution... dont date a man with kids if you dont want him to pay for them.  I wouldnt date a douche that would turn his back on his kid anyway.  

psych_mom
by on Apr. 30, 2014 at 12:16 PM

She could probably get in trouble for collecting the daycare money after the kid was no longer in daycare, but the courts will probably ask him when he didn't report it. The courts will take her income into account as well so there probably won't be a large increase, if any. They will most likely take into account the fact that he does have a child that lives with him full time, so that will factor in. She gets more for 1 child that I do for three, that is a very large amount for one kid. I didn't see the point in pushing for more than I get for my three and they are all older than 7. Sounds as if she did this intentionally, but I hope she realizes that eventually cs stops.

cheetah90210
by Bronze Member on Apr. 30, 2014 at 1:10 PM
Ew
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