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The Venting Booth The Venting Booth

The experts say we can't spank our children, we can't yell at our children, and now we can't put our children in time-out.  Apparently, our children are delicate little snowflakes whose entire future hinges on us never losing our cool or making them sad during any part of raising them or all is for nothing.  They will become the next Ted Bundy, Adolf Hitler, or Aileen Wuornos if you potty train them incorrectly.

Don't hug them too much!  Make sure you hug them enough!  Don't call them bossy.  Give them a chance to make decisions.  Don't ignore them.  Don't make them the center of your universe.  Only use positive affirmation with them.  Don't let them have too high of self-esteem.  It's like parenthood has become some tight rope act that if one leans too far to one side or the other will completely drop the ball on parenthood and give the world another psychopath. 

I have a SIL who has 5 kids and spanked them as a primary form of discipline.  They are middle school aged to college aged, well adjusted, good kids.  My cousin never spanked her two children and are both in middle school, well adjusted, good kids.  It is possible that ::gasp:: good human beings can be produced through different means of discipline?

Maybe apart of our Motherhood Job is to decide who our children are and what they need to be well functioning human beings.  Maybe, just maybe, even the less -than-perfect parents who love their children and want the best for them can produce good human beings, even if they don't parent "right" all the time.


Is anyone else tired of the experts?!


by on May. 5, 2014 at 8:18 PM
Replies (91-100):
N_maricle
by Member on May. 8, 2014 at 11:57 AM

I completely agree. 

msalice_21
by Member on May. 8, 2014 at 12:07 PM

Agreed! I had co parenting last week and the co parenting therapist told us we need to do a sticker chart at home. Not to take things away from our son if hes doing something wrong... instead tell him hes not getting a sticker for the day. WTF IS THAT NOISE?!! I dont run a little kid daycare. This is my home where I should have the freedom to disciplne my son the way I choose.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 9 on May. 8, 2014 at 12:11 PM
1 mom liked this

Meanwhile, Boston new reported this morning that graduating high school seniors lack crucial skills needed to thrive in the "real world" ... I don't spank, but I do yell and get pissed off at my daughter. She's going to need to know how to handle hurt, failure, disappointment, etc. It sucks to see it, but it's going to happen! Better when they're young and learning than when they're in college and decide to kill themselves because they can't cope with a failing grade or a date declining a prom invite.

 

JayeC2
by Member on May. 9, 2014 at 8:04 AM
1 mom liked this

Preach it, sister!  Each of my  kids is different - I can't parent each one of them exactly the same or I would fail them.  There is no one cookie cutter method for raising them, because our kids aren't little Stepford kids pre-programmed in the factory.....

dominic062407
by New Member on May. 9, 2014 at 8:34 AM
I agree. Also when a kid gets in trouble at school the parents always run up screaming nooooooo my kid would NEVER do that while the kid is thinking hahahahaha I get away with everything
libsterdoodle
by Member on May. 9, 2014 at 9:20 AM

Amen sister!!  I agree completely!  It is the parents decision how to discipline and raise their child.  And unless there is some form of abuse happening it is absolutely no one else's business!!!  My best friend handles her kids differently from my own and I don't judge.  She knows her kids better than anyone, and I know my kids better than anyone.  I am not a fan of spanking, mostly because it makes me feel guilty when I do and the kids can sense that and it ends up working against me.  But my kids are smart, funny, silly, kids!!  My daughter has a bit of a smart mouth and we are working through that, but I wouldn't want them to be any different than they are.  I know many parents who spank their kids, and that is their right and choice.  A few of those people have great kids and there are a few in there that have some trouble!  Bottom line is that kids are kids and they are going to misbehave and test limits no matter what form of discipline you use, just be there for them and smother them in love!!!!

Jessy76
by on May. 9, 2014 at 11:51 AM

There is absolutely no such thing as an expert in parenting. Parenting is a game of ups and downs no one thing works perfectly every time with every child. All we can do is what we think is best and love our kids with every fiber of our being. We ARE going to make mistakes that is part of life we just hope that we have more wins than loses.

1frog
by on May. 9, 2014 at 1:07 PM

 Yep, I am. My son is grown and there were times when I was told I was doing things 'wrong.' Even so you can't get away from hearing from them. But who knows a child better than their own mother? It's to the point where we can't do or say anything to, for or about our precious snowflakes, but that would probably be considered neglect and that would be wrong to. We said screw them to the experts a long time ago, and our son has turned out very well.

mumsmusingmind
by on May. 9, 2014 at 1:35 PM

OMG YES!  I am a firm believer in letting my daughter guide us in raising her.  We are first timers and really don't know what the hell we are doing.  But letting her give us signals as to when she's ready for somehting or how to dicipline her best has been the best decision we've made.  We've seen such better results than just doing what we're told to do or what we think is right.  We also do not let her run our lives, we are the parents, so there are rules too.  But I really believe that focusing on the needs of your child will help you determine the best way to raise them.

New mommy blogger!  Recipies, reviews and life stories.  Follow our journey on becoming a family.  Mumsmusingmind.blogspot.com

Jamaicanmecrazi
by Member on May. 9, 2014 at 1:36 PM
"Experts"
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