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Advice anyone??

Posted by on May. 6, 2014 at 2:01 AM
  • 11 Replies
Okay i need some advice or input on an important issue! Maybe I'm over reacting but my gut says this isnt okay..
I have a 2 year old son (3 in july), and a little cousin (boy) who will be 5 in july.
The 5 yr old has no discipline at home whatsoever and is always doing things he knows hes not supposed to then laughs in anyone's face that tells him no.
Anyways, we've limited the time he hangs out with our son for multiple reasons such as him being extremely aggressive and a bad influence. But recently we've been catching him taking my son's clothes off whenever they're alone! multiple times I've stopped them from going off alone together because I hear him asking my son "you wanna be naked?"
I know that younger kids get curious but this is a re occurring thing regardless of how many times we've told him that its not okay.
I mean I even Have to stop him from going into the bathroom with my son because he literally tries to force his way in to watch!

We've gotten to the point where we've been avoiding family functions that they are at because i don't want him around my son. and its a really hard subject to bring up to my aunt especially when she has the "boys will be boys" attitude or she tells me, "Oh i don't think skyler (my son) is completely innocent in all of this"

Anybody have similar situations or advice?
by on May. 6, 2014 at 2:01 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Momsalawyer
by Member on May. 6, 2014 at 2:21 AM
1 mom liked this

The natural curiousity about naked doesn't usually exhibit itself in repeating behavior like this, especially when you have told the five year old it is not ok.  You need to tell your Aunt that either she puts a stop to her son's behavior immediately or you are done allowing your boy to hang out with hers.  Period.  Maybe it is nothing abnormal at all but not a risk you can afford to take for your little guy.  Is there any chance that your nephew has been/ is being abused?  Are you seeing sexual play or anything like that or just the nakedness?

Ashley_719
by Member on May. 6, 2014 at 2:32 AM
Not as far as i know, and I haven't seen any sexual behavior, just him constantly taking my son's pants off or trying to watch him go to the bathroom. BUT, I'm not going to risk it. Tonight when he attempted twice, and proceeded to laugh when i told him no, i flipped and told him (in front of my aunt) that he was no longer aloud to play with my son.

Just a difficult situation when his mom thinks its perfectly fine.
mrsbatchelor
by Member on May. 6, 2014 at 2:55 AM
1 mom liked this
ASHLEY7_719----- I think you need to have a serious discussion with your aunt, I mean maybe nothing is going on at home... it could be at school maybe a child is doing it to her son and he thinks it's ok behavior either way you are doing the right thing by separating them for a while
iamcafemom83
by Bronze Member on May. 6, 2014 at 4:02 AM
2 moms liked this
That isn't normal 5 yr old behavior.
I would definitely not have him around your son. I do think it needs to be brought to his mom's attention. Even if she brushes you off for now. Then, keep an eye on him. See if anything changes.
happyolechimp
by Member on May. 6, 2014 at 6:30 AM
1 mom liked this
the mothers not going to listen...that little boy has been seeing this....somewhere..enough to be obsessed...you maybe can't change his behavior...but you can protect your younger son...he should have a friend his own age anyway...just take a stand hun..do it.. ;-)
NDADanceMom
by on May. 6, 2014 at 6:38 AM
1 mom liked this

I would tell the boys parents "I am calling CPS if your son does any of the following... asks about my child being naked, tries to remove his clothes or tries to get him alone."  His behavior is indicative of a child that has been molested and goes beyond normal curiosity.  Since he is old enough for school he is certainly old enough to know to keep clothes on and not wander off alone when told not to."

I would even tell the child that you are going to call the police if you ever see or hear of him trying to take off anyones clothes.  

MissDanie
by Member on May. 6, 2014 at 6:43 AM

No that's not normal. Someone has either been doing something similar to that boy or  doing that to someone in front of that boy.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on May. 6, 2014 at 7:28 AM
No not normal .
My situation I went to check in on my dd 4 at the time and my 11yr old niece (Hubby's side) they were watching TV.I walked in and my niece jumped and I seen a panic look on her face so I pulled my daughter out of the room and asked her what was going on . she started to cry so I told her do not be affraif momma is not mad at you I just want to know what is going on. She told me my niece was kissing her I asked her what kind of kiss. She said she stcum her tounge in her mouth. I went inside and started bitching the 11yr old out. I called her mother thinking her mother would deal with it( I wanted to grab that child and beat her. ) well she did nothing no punishment no nothing. They turned the blame on a 11yr old boy kissing the niece a week prior. Ever since then I cut all ties with that child and mother. If you are not going to be a parent and punish or seek help for your child I do not want anything to do with you.
Ashley_719
by Member on May. 6, 2014 at 3:58 PM
Thanks guys! I already planned on cutting ties and keeping my son away from now on but still its nice to have my decision backed up by people outside the situation, if that makes sense.
Traci_Momof2
by Member on May. 6, 2014 at 4:26 PM

I agree that it's not normal and I fear there is something going on with / to your little cousin that is not right.  You can decide how involved or not you want to get in your cousin but at the very least you have every right to do what you need to do to protect your own son from the situation.

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