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17 movie Titles to describe my mom body

Posted by on Aug. 1, 2014 at 7:28 PM
  • 9 Replies
1 mom liked this

Kids change your life. In SO many ways. The way you think, the way you feel about things, your body. Today I got thinking.

You guys remember all of those buzzfeed topics going around the internet and facebook like "Describe your sex life with a movie title" or "Describe your ex with a movie title" or the less popular "Describe your poop with a movie title"? What if I took that concept to describe my current MOM body. Well, it's summer time, and if you are anything like me you've had to get yourself into your swimsuit at least once this summer.


I don't know about you, but every time I have to squeeze, pull, jump, wiggle, grunt, yell, stretch and shimmy into a bathing suit, by the time I am actually in it, I am never feeling "GORGEOUS." I'm not ashamed of how I look, I think i just might need a personal assistant to get into this stupid thing!


My hair is all messed up, I am sweaty from all the strange movements I even had to do to get the fricken one piece on. Battle wounds from it snapping back onto my skin trying to manipulate this thing up to my shoulders. All the while trying to convince myself, "Yes, this is how everyone looks in a swimsuit. Chubby babies are so cute, so I must be ADORABLE in this skin tight piece of offensive material. " So now that I am officially ready to swim according to pool Nazis who make these rules, what better time than now to start describing my body with movie titles?


Jingle All The Way

Gravity Apocalypse Now

Mama-Mia Despicable Me

Lost in Translation

How to lose a guy in 10 days

Where the wild things are

The Grudge

The Blind Side

The Great Escape

The Awful Truth

Blazing Saddles

Downfall

The Thing

Mission Impossible

Flubber

Do you feel the same? Which ones would you add to your own list? I am ready for winter now! I am not for body shaming, but why not laugh at the things we cant change at the moment! Love the skin you're in! Maybe one day Ill have that tight body again, but until then, I hope they keep making movies with good titles!

by on Aug. 1, 2014 at 7:28 PM
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Replies (1-9):
AcheronsWoe
by Member on Aug. 2, 2014 at 7:16 PM

The Blob

kayceejane
by on Aug. 3, 2014 at 8:05 PM
1 mom liked this

Zombie Strippers

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Aug. 3, 2014 at 8:22 PM
Titanic
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Aug. 3, 2014 at 8:50 PM
Im sure your body isnt as bad as you think it is. Why are women so hard on themselves? Why are we soooo concerned with outward appearance?? Its a little ridiculous...
diaperstodating
by on Aug. 3, 2014 at 8:52 PM
Lol
whimsyhaven
by New Member on Aug. 4, 2014 at 2:22 AM

mine would be meeting venus...i know how to work what i've got.wink

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Aug. 4, 2014 at 2:54 AM
Norbit-- I mean the wife not the dude :/
Roxanne92
by Member on Aug. 4, 2014 at 3:03 AM
Titanic
Flubber
Big Mamas house
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Aug. 4, 2014 at 9:38 AM

Clash of the Titans. 

I got into my suit this year to get in the pool with my kids here at home and well.............it was depressing a little.  I put on some weight when we moved for work.  The place we had to settle on was a tiny rental and due to work schedules and school, I had almost no time to exercise.  We finally bought a house and our schedules are better so I can exercise again.  I just didn't realize how bad I had gotten.  My thighs are huge and I have some work to do on my torso.  It could definitely be worse but it's bad enough.

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