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They couldn't even congratulate her!?!

Posted by on Dec. 20, 2014 at 3:54 AM
  • 46 Replies
3 moms liked this

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Our eleven year old daughter is in competitive cheerleading, she has been since the age of five. Anyway, this last competition was a drama fest and has DD not wanting anyone watching her anymore.
DD's squad had placed second at regionals. After placement was announced we all ran to get pictures with her ect. First off, my Grandmothers who hadn't seen her before competition were sent on a rampage because Haley was wearing "too much make up" and it's "inappropriate." Instead of congratulating her! Haley did well with ignoring it. Then my Grandmother said "All the teams in her division did really good, but I don't know how her team placed. They didn't do anything extravagant." Boy, was I annoyed at this point. But, I kept my mouth shut to keep peace and had hoped that Haley hadn't heard her.
On the way home, Haley was extremely quiet and not like she had been before when she had placed. When we got home, we were trying to find room for her new trophy and ribbon when Haley announced that she heard her Great Grandmothers bickering and how she was upset that doing what she loves disappoints them. I sat her down and told her how proud I was of her, not because she placed. But, the hard work and dedication she puts into it.
After she went to bed, I made a call to my Grandmothers and explained to them how their statements had really hurt Haley. I had also asked them not to be in attendance to the State Competition. I love these women deeply, but I don't want Haley giving up something she loves doing because of their inability to keep unkind thoughts to themselves.
On a side note: the make up ordeal didn't bother me so much. I understand seeing thousands of little girls wearing make up, fake hair ect can be overwhelming. I don't have issues with it, since it's only for competition. While some coaches require fake hair, fake lashes and all the make up...Haley's coach only requires real hair to be curled, mascara, eye liner and glitter.
I do feel bad that my Grandmothers are hurt, however they did this to me when I was young and I'm not allowing them to teach my daughter that she must live to make them happy.
by on Dec. 20, 2014 at 3:54 AM
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Replies (1-10):
katarina666
by Member on Dec. 20, 2014 at 4:01 AM
4 moms liked this

I'd be livid if those two old fossils treated my daughter like that. You know they are going to do this sort of thing with anything she does. They are bitter old cunts. protect your daughter from them. You know how they treated you. Don't invite them to anything. Tell them they are acting more childish than children.

msharleyjr
by Member on Dec. 20, 2014 at 4:09 AM
1 mom liked this
Good for you!!! Your kids come first and they're only kids for a little while, they should have happy times. If the Grandmas can't behave and be supportive then yes they need to stay home. Maybe when they learn to act properly they can come out to play!
Congrats to your beautiful daughter!!!
She should be proud competitive cheerleading is extremely time consuming and takes strength and dedication.
I'm proud of her!
Tell her not to give up doing what she loves to do. Sorry this had to happen this way. Many (((huggz. )))
canfield22
by Member on Dec. 20, 2014 at 4:53 AM
They don't understand the hard work all these young ladies put into their routines. I tried explaining that I have witnessed these ladies walk out of practice with injuries from practice. Our daughter is one of the flyers, she has fallen many times during practice. Some nights are spent icing muscles and pain reliever before bed. But, Haley and her teammates suck it up and do what they have too. Aside from all that, these girls perform in front of thousands of people! Which is nerve wracking in itself, then to include yelling, screaming, clapping ect while trying to do a liberty or scorpion while standing on a few hands....that itself should be applauded.
I'm not optimistic that they'll ever understand nor that they'll ever stop using the fact that youngsters want them to be proud and their approval to hurt them or mold into what they want.

Quoting msharleyjr: Good for you!!! Your kids come first and they're only kids for a little while, they should have happy times. If the Grandmas can't behave and be supportive then yes they need to stay home. Maybe when they learn to act properly they can come out to play!
Congrats to your beautiful daughter!!!
She should be proud competitive cheerleading is extremely time consuming and takes strength and dedication.
I'm proud of her!
Tell her not to give up doing what she loves to do. Sorry this had to happen this way. Many (((huggz. )))
Jenniy
by Member on Dec. 20, 2014 at 4:56 AM

Since they didn't say it, CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!!!! Your DD should be very proud of herself, and good for you for standing up to your grandma's on your DD's behalf. 

msharleyjr
by Member on Dec. 20, 2014 at 5:02 AM
Just as grandparents they should proud of what their grandchildren are doing. I never have been able to understand this type of behavior. You just keep doing what your doing and encouraging Haily and she'll keep doing a great job. I have faith in her. My step daughter used to do competitive cheerleading until she tore her ligaments in both her ankles , she became a gymnastic coach for awhile after that, the last I heard she was going back to college.
Anyway, her grandmother was that type of grandmother that criticized EVERYTHING . I sometimes wonder if she didn't miss that jump on purpose(?)


Quoting canfield22: They don't understand the hard work all these young ladies put into their routines. I tried explaining that I have witnessed these ladies walk out of practice with injuries from practice. Our daughter is one of the flyers, she has fallen many times during practice. Some nights are spent icing muscles and pain reliever before bed. But, Haley and her teammates suck it up and do what they have too. Aside from all that, these girls perform in front of thousands of people! Which is nerve wracking in itself, then to include yelling, screaming, clapping ect while trying to do a liberty or scorpion while standing on a few hands....that itself should be applauded.
I'm not optimistic that they'll ever understand nor that they'll ever stop using the fact that youngsters want them to be proud and their approval to hurt them or mold into what they want.

Quoting msharleyjr: Good for you!!! Your kids come first and they're only kids for a little while, they should have happy times. If the Grandmas can't behave and be supportive then yes they need to stay home. Maybe when they learn to act properly they can come out to play!
Congrats to your beautiful daughter!!!
She should be proud competitive cheerleading is extremely time consuming and takes strength and dedication.
I'm proud of her!
Tell her not to give up doing what she loves to do. Sorry this had to happen this way. Many (((huggz. )))
PogoPalOj
by on Dec. 20, 2014 at 6:33 AM

clappingGood for you!  I think you both look great!  Good luck to your daughter in future competitions and congratulations to her! 

angl_gurl1
by on Dec. 29, 2014 at 2:42 PM

i think shes a beautiful lil girl and it sounds like she does great in what she loves doing. dont let her give it up. tell the old fossils to keep their mouth holes shut

cheetah90210
by Silver Member on Dec. 29, 2014 at 2:57 PM
You made the right decision
Pink.Frosting
by on Dec. 29, 2014 at 3:03 PM

My daughter used to be in dance and any time they did a show - the make up was a lot and a big deal.  Would I have ever let her walk around on a normal day like that?  No way.  But for a show it was perfectly fine and expected.  I think you did the right thing in asking them to not come.  They really showed a lack of respect by bursting her bubble like that.

tabe1012
by on Dec. 29, 2014 at 7:03 PM
First, Congrats!! That's a big accomplishment! She should be over the moon!

I see nothing wrong with the makeup she had on. Like you said, it's only for competition, not like she wears it everyday.

If they can't be supportive, they don't need to be there. You can't contol if they were to show up, but I doubt they'd show up unannounced after being told that your daughter didn't need the negativity.
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