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'Being a mom doesn't mean you can be lazy!'

Posted by on Aug. 4, 2016 at 1:15 PM
  • 6 Replies
1 mom liked this

Brand-New Mom Rants About 'Lazy' Parents & Sets Off a Firestorm

Tanvier Peart
Tanvier Peart

New mom blasts parents who complain about their kids

You know that saying, "You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar"? Yeah, it's true. And yet, too many people take to their soapboxes to point out issues that have others, on the receiving end, preparing for battle. This unnamed mom's Facebook rant about complaining isn't entirely wrong -- but the delivery definitely gets two thumbs way down.

Proud mommy to a 2-week-old baby, this mama had no issue calling out other moms who constantly feel the need to complain about being a parent. Pointing out everything from food underneath the couch to the failure to keep up with personal hygiene, Mom went in -- and doesn't give a flip what you think about it.

"If my child managed to smear peanut butter all over my curtains, that tells me that I'm not watching them close enough. Food is eaten at the table, not while running through the house."

Wow. Tell us how you really feel!

It's a good thing the Sanctimommies Facebook page removed Mom's identity. One can only imagine the number of people who would flood her message box with insults and threats of throwing dirty diapers at her door.

More from CafeMom: 8 New Mom Mistakes I'm Embarassed to Admit I've Made

I know I'm gonna catch stones to the head for this, but I think some of what this mother has to say is kinda true.

Hear me out.

Being a parent doesn't give you a license to be "lazy." You can have a baby, still cook, and do your best to keep your house clean. After I had my second son (my kiddos are 16 months apart), I felt the energy to cook, though I left tidying up to my husband.

So yeah, there are certain things you can still do as a mother.

But calling someone lazy is hardly right, on any level. And if having a messy home at times makes you a bad parent, I guess I'm guilty as charged. I'm also guilty of sometimes letting my kid watch Caillou. That should seriously be a crime.

(There's my 2-year-old zipping through the living area with his play mop and bucket.)

Toys everywhere!

Does my house look like a tornado ran through it at times? Yes, it does. Does my home with 2- and 1-year-old boys look messy all the time? Nope. It's a household rule to clean up your stuff each day.

As much as it hurts to step on a toy, seeing my children play without fear of not touching this or rushing to put up that is one of the greatest blessings in my life. My life is full of craziness, complexities, and disorder from time to time -- and it doesn't make me a lazy mother.

(For the record, my 2-year-old helps me sweep and mop the home. While my kiddos do love playing, they also enjoy tidying up.)

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I think it's safe to assume that no mother on this earth wakes up and says to herself, Yup, I really want a deconstructed look in my home, full of stains and sh** everywhere.

It's just not true.

Perhaps this mom will realize -- once her sweet 2-week-old gets out of sleep mode -- that trying to keep up with tots can be hard work. They keep you on your feet, require a ton of energy, and can literally turn things upside.

There are going to be messes. There are going to be stains. And, just like you aren't a perfect mother if you have less than others, you aren't a horrible or lazy parent if there's a wee bit more chaos in your home.

As happy as I am that Mom is making a conscious effort to keep her place tidy, her meals cooked, and her appearance snatched, all of us need to be careful not to shame others moms.

We already get enough of that!

by on Aug. 4, 2016 at 1:15 PM
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Replies (1-6):
by Bronze Member on Aug. 4, 2016 at 1:18 PM

I agree with this woman.  Taking pride in your hygiene, appearance and health shouldn't be complicated. 

by Silver Member on Aug. 4, 2016 at 1:50 PM
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I never understood the whole thing about being SO overwhelmed with everything after having a baby. 

I came home from the hospital and ok I was tired and stuff for about a week and then life went on.  I cooked 3 meals a day, I was walking my dog, I was getting dressed, doing my hair and make up every day, I never went a day without a shower (I SOOOOO don't understand that one) my house was clean, my baby was clean.  Hell the first month I had DD I had all kinds of people coming to visit all the time.  I scrap booked, ran errands, even had a little time to watch a talk show or two.   I took baby classes.  I made baby food from scratch you name it, I did it .  I didn't even OWN a play pen, my daughter only touched her bed when sleeping. and I never felt the needs to rant about anything

However, I didn't spend any time on social media, my cell phone was used only to make or receive phone calls (we're talking 2004 here) I think that's the big difference here ... moms today spends hours on social media bitching about how hard it is to tend to their kids instead of doing a proper job at what they're bitching about.

by Anonymous 1 on Aug. 4, 2016 at 3:03 PM

I agree, I don't know how some moms can still not take a shower everyday and not tidy up. My house isn't perfect, there's toys on the floor of course but that's about it. And I still make time to shower, I'd feel much worse if I didn't.

by Anonymous 2 on Aug. 4, 2016 at 3:37 PM
1 mom liked this
My ex would say that was me when our first son was 2. What ex didn't understand, was that HE was messier than our toddler and he expected me to clean up after him as well. And when I didn't, I was lazy. Yet he couldn't bother to get up and feed our child if I was at school.
by Bronze Member on Aug. 4, 2016 at 7:04 PM

I was a new mom at 16 and a SN kid. We (husband) handled it together and managed to keep the house clean, take showers and get some sleep. On top of all that, we were driving 100 miles round trip 1-2x a month to take him (son) to a special hospital. 

by on Aug. 8, 2016 at 12:55 PM

I so appreciate this! As new moms, we need to give ourselves permission to parent and cope in the way that we need to. Maybe even look at life as "lived in seasons". This week - or this month - all I can do is feed and care for myself and my baby. Next month will be different - AND THAT IS OK! Bravo to mamas who know when to bring the walls in and only do what they need to do to get by, without trying to maintain everyone else's expectations and killing themselves in the process. 

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