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All for nothing

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 13 Replies
I've been with my husband for 10 years, married for 5. We have 3 kids, and I'm unfortunately a sahm. I used to love being a sahm until he ruined that for me. NOTHING, and I mean nothing ever makes him happy. House could be spotless, laundry all done , folded and put away, both kids taken well care of 24/7, dinner always made and he still finds things to nag about.

If I want to go for a coffee with a friend, he questions everything. He doesn't trust me, yet I've never given him a reason to not trust me. I've been 150% committee to this relationship since day 1.

He doesn't help with the kids, ever. He says because he works he doesn't have to do anything else. He constantly reminds me that he works and that it's his money, his house, his car... It drives me nuts.

I want to get a job and he says he's not changing his schedule for my dead beat job. He said he doesn't want me to work because he doesn't want to take care of the kids, he doesn't think he has too.

He constantly talks down to me, tells me I'm nothing without him. Says I'd never be able to do anything that he does.

We separated last year for 4 months but he begged me to come back , and promised things would change. And they did, for 2 weeks. I should have run away and never looked back because here I am miserable all over again.

I'm just so over it. I deserve respect, love and affection.. The kids deserve a loving father, not one who just works all the time to avoid us. I'm about to hop on the divorce wagon!
Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 6, 2016 at 4:11 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Aug. 6, 2016 at 9:38 PM

I don't think you and him weren't on the same page on the number of children you wanted and it's why he's unhappy with you.  It's also why he doesn't feel the need to look after them.  Just look at the number of people he is responsible for 4 (you and 3 kids) plus all the household bills.  That is a little much to bear, don't you think?  Just imagine if you were the main bread winner and he wasnt' working. Care to switch places with him for a year? 

Go and divorce but don't as for child support since it was your idea to bring them into the world.  Support them at your own dime and see if you are happy. 

Akame45
by New Member on Aug. 7, 2016 at 12:55 PM
4 moms liked this
Are you seriously that ignorant. Anatomy lesson, it takes two people to make a baby. Not one, as you seem to be suggesting. Furthermore the dude is clearly a narcissistic ass hole. The signs are all there. You suggest that she switch places with her husband for a year. I suggest you switch places with her for a year. Then we'll see if you still get on the internet and post such bullshit. Honestly Im embarrassed for you. Your post is that stupid

Quoting Anonymous 2:

I don't think you and him weren't on the same page on the number of children you wanted and it's why he's unhappy with you.  It's also why he doesn't feel the need to look after them.  Just look at the number of people he is responsible for 4 (you and 3 kids) plus all the household bills.  That is a little much to bear, don't you think?  Just imagine if you were the main bread winner and he wasnt' working. Care to switch places with him for a year? 

Go and divorce but don't as for child support since it was your idea to bring them into the world.  Support them at your own dime and see if you are happy. 

Traci_Momof2
by Member on Aug. 7, 2016 at 3:21 PM

Get out now and don't look back.  He not only sounds like a complete and total ass, he sounds controlling, and if that's the case it's only going to worse which is only going to make it harder for you to leave.

DisabledVet
by on Aug. 7, 2016 at 3:56 PM

Why didn't you make marriage counseling a condition of coming back? 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Aug. 7, 2016 at 3:58 PM
Leave. Don't waste your life with an asshole
Meepandstitch2
by on Aug. 7, 2016 at 4:00 PM

I think you are making the right choice unfortunately. You deserve to be happy 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Aug. 7, 2016 at 7:16 PM

Switch place with her?  Her quote "I used to love being a sahm until he ruined that for meYou switch places with him and then you'd understand why he's unhappy vs. her being happy being a SAHM.  She doesn't have so tough does she and it's why she kept having those children at the cost of him.

Quoting Akame45: Are you seriously that ignorant. Anatomy lesson, it takes two people to make a baby. Not one, as you seem to be suggesting. Furthermore the dude is clearly a narcissistic ass hole. The signs are all there. You suggest that she switch places with her husband for a year. I suggest you switch places with her for a year. Then we'll see if you still get on the internet and post such bullshit. Honestly Im embarrassed for you. Your post is that stupid
Quoting Anonymous 2:

I don't think you and him weren't on the same page on the number of children you wanted and it's why he's unhappy with you.  It's also why he doesn't feel the need to look after them.  Just look at the number of people he is responsible for 4 (you and 3 kids) plus all the household bills.  That is a little much to bear, don't you think?  Just imagine if you were the main bread winner and he wasnt' working. Care to switch places with him for a year? 

Go and divorce but don't as for child support since it was your idea to bring them into the world.  Support them at your own dime and see if you are happy. 


Aster302516
by Member on Aug. 8, 2016 at 12:11 AM

A friend of mine is facing some similar issues with her husband and I can understand how frustrating this is for you. My friend found it helpful to speak with a counselor. Have you considered getting in touch with one? I just said a prayer for you and I really hope you find some help in your situation. Sending love and hugs your way!


Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Aug. 8, 2016 at 12:20 AM
Life is way to short to be unhappy. Trust me you will feel like a huge weight has been lifted. I had to start over with a newborn (I'm talking 3 weeks old) and a 2yr old but there is nothing like peace of mind. Good luck.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Aug. 8, 2016 at 10:31 PM
He's an asshole! If he has to keep throwing in your face that he's the breadwinner to make himself feel better. He should have stayed single! The kids are his responsibility too! You should tell him he needs to change his attitude or you will divorce him. He's not a decent husband, treating you like that.
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