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I'll make dinner. But not for you.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 58 Replies
So I typically make dinner. I work 10 hour days. And we started a new business that I invest 20+hours in a week & my dad is having health problems. Dh used to clean up after but now I do because we had a mouse problem and I scrubbed the kitchen too to bottom and since I insist no dishes in the sink overnight it's my job. It's me and dh and sd is with us 50/50. I told him a couple of months ago that I can no longer make dinner on nights that I am working. This works out to *4* nights or fewer per month that I requested that he take care of dinner (days that we have sd AND I work. If it's just the two of us we can have cereal or whatever) he could make frozen pizza for all I care I just cannot come home exhausted and then cook.

The last time he texted me should he grab something from the store for dinner and I responded it better be pizza because I'm exhausted already and not coming home to cook. So he did and wanted a pat on the back because he preheated the oven. I stupidly took it from there but I reminded him that he's going to have to start pitching in those days.

So here we are today. I worked 4 ten hour days in a row and yesterday I found out one of our patients died. And today dh was off all day lounging with sd. I walk in the door at 7:00 collapse on the couch. I
Literally did not get a break all day and even had to leave some of my tasks unfinished because I have so much going on right now. So he says to me "I guess I should make dinner for me and sd?" I said "idk. I'm not making anything." he goes in the kitchen and cooks for them and makes me nothing. Doesn't even offer. I made myself a bagel.

I am glad in the sense that whatever he made smelled awful and sd complained and when she came back in the living room she said she felt sick to her stomach. So I'm glad I didn't have to eat it lol but I am seriously hurt and angry that he Was so thoughtless.

He works 7 hours m-f with enough breaks that he watches movies and tv during the day. And today he literally did nothing. Didn't even have sd most of the day because she had a class.

He CAN prepare meals and he used to just fine when we met so I feel like it is him being passive agggressive.
Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 23, 2017 at 8:56 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Sep. 23, 2017 at 8:58 PM
1 mom liked this
I feel like this could easily be resolved like adults and this entire problem prevented if you wouldn't act like a child.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 23, 2017 at 9:04 PM
At what point did I act like a child?

Quoting Anonymous 2: I feel like this could easily be resolved like adults and this entire problem prevented if you wouldn't act like a child.
WickedOpal
by Bronze Member on Sep. 23, 2017 at 9:06 PM

Sounds like it.  He takes you for granted.  

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Sep. 23, 2017 at 9:23 PM
1 mom liked this
I wouldn't make dinner for you either. Get off your high horse. People who play the martyr are annoing as fuck. Grow the hell up!
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 23, 2017 at 9:33 PM
1 mom liked this
No. playing the martyr would be to continue to cook and then bitch about it.

I asked for help because I'm exhausted and he snubbed me. I didn't get married to be anyone's cook or maid.

Quoting Anonymous 3: I wouldn't make dinner for you either. Get off your high horse. People who play the martyr are annoing as fuck. Grow the hell up!
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 23, 2017 at 9:58 PM
1 mom liked this
It's not about me wanting him to make me dinner. I really don't care. The heart of it is he is refusing to accept my "no" and trying to wear me down by asking me what's for dinner or whatever after I have clearly expressed that on specific days I won't be cooking. He says he's okay with it and then when the time comes he badgers me.

Him making dinner and making a point of making dinner for just him and for sd and not for me was just a dig to try to manipulate me into doing what he wants.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Sep. 23, 2017 at 9:59 PM
1 mom liked this
Oh stfu you just HAD to include how you are thw ONLY one who does dishes because you saw a mouse and dont want dishes in the sink. BOO FUCKING HOO!

Quoting Anonymous 1: No. playing the martyr would be to continue to cook and then bitch about it.

I asked for help because I'm exhausted and he snubbed me. I didn't get married to be anyone's cook or maid.

Quoting Anonymous 3: I wouldn't make dinner for you either. Get off your high horse. People who play the martyr are annoing as fuck. Grow the hell up!
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Sep. 23, 2017 at 10:02 PM
Sounds like a house run by children. Where are the adults?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Sep. 23, 2017 at 10:08 PM
1 mom liked this

Then go back to being a single mom again and this way you wouldn't have to put up with him.

Quoting Anonymous 1: No. playing the martyr would be to continue to cook and then bitch about it. I asked for help because I'm exhausted and he snubbed me. I didn't get married to be anyone's cook or maid.
Quoting Anonymous 3: I wouldn't make dinner for you either. Get off your high horse. People who play the martyr are annoing as fuck. Grow the hell up!


Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Sep. 23, 2017 at 10:12 PM
6 moms liked this
I feel your pain there's nothing s nothing worse than working your ass off all day coming home exhausted and still having shit to do at home. Then you find them sitting on the couch being bums and then have the nerve to ask why you are so bitchy. Then don't even consider your feelings or needs or wants vent away I am rnot ght there with you!
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