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Does your husband help?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 34 Replies
I work part time.he works full time.I have always cleaned the house. Did laundry blah blah..normal mom stuff. He had a accident years ago so he can't do all the things he use to be able to do, I've started doing things for him I know he can do but I try to take some of the weight off so he doesn't get himself he hurt anynore. This includes moving furniture carrying in groceries taking out trash I litteraly do all the heavy stuff. I'm tired. Seriously. When ever he does anything around the house I help, whether it's being a gopher. Or physically helping. I help. Yesterday we had some light construction going on which made the house a mess, furniture needs moved back the whole house needs scrubbed.
I made a joke about hey, it would get done really fast if you helped clean up..you would have thought I asked him to build the Taj Mahal in a hour.. He then stated that I don't work 40 hours a week, I work part time, I should never need help cleaning...seriously?! This Sat with me all night and today until i brought it up, I said we both live here, I never ask for help cooking or cleaning, doing a laundry nothing..ever. I said I work 7 day a week picking up after everyone, it's ridiculous. I cook, clean, Do Wash, clean up after the animals,shop,and work. I did this all when I worked 40 hrs a week also. He just doesn't get it. I said it would be nice if someone offered to load the dishwasher, or throw in a load of wash. I don't ask anyone to mop or vacuum just simple easy things every once in awhile would be so nice. I know these are normal "mom" duties and I never said I dont mind doing them, but I hate that it's like that's all I'm worth because I don't work 40 hrs, that me working in the house is like my actual job to make up the other 20 hours...
Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 4, 2017 at 12:06 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Sallyjally
by New Member on Dec. 4, 2017 at 3:39 AM

I work part time too and do the majority of stuff around the house. My husband does do things but expects praise when he does it which REALLY annoys me. Maybe you should go on strike for a few days and see what happens! 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Dec. 4, 2017 at 6:26 AM
Yes mine helps a lot. Yours just sounds lazy.
How did he get hurt? What's wrong with him?
mommytoeandb
by Bronze Member on Dec. 4, 2017 at 6:38 AM
Yes, he's always helped when he's at home. More so when we both worked full-time. I try to get everything done while he's at work so we can have more family time.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Dec. 4, 2017 at 6:39 AM
I'm a sahm. My dh will sometimes come home and cook dinner after being gone almost 12 hours. Or dishes. He started laundry while I was grocery shopping yesterday. We both have done the remodeling of the house. I hardly ever have to ask him to do anything. He even called me superwoman yesterday for getting all the grocery shopping done. I love my dh!

My ex dh was one of those who categorized women's and men's jobs. He refused to help bring in 200.00+ worth of groceries. He sat there and waited for his dinner while I put everything away. He wouldn't even separate laundry colors. It became really old. And that was when I was working and going to school.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 4, 2017 at 6:52 AM
Tried it. Doesn't work.

Quoting Sallyjally:

I work part time too and do the majority of stuff around the house. My husband does do things but expects praise when he does it which REALLY annoys me. Maybe you should go on strike for a few days and see what happens! 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 4, 2017 at 6:54 AM
Broken back, freak accident.

Quoting Anonymous 2: Yes mine helps a lot. Yours just sounds lazy.
How did he get hurt? What's wrong with him?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Dec. 4, 2017 at 6:54 AM
I think if you’re working part time to help with finances he could lift a finger and help with house work. If he looks at cleaning and homemaking as your job, than financially supporting the family can be his job.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 4, 2017 at 6:58 AM
I HATE the catagorizing of work...but I even do what is considered "man's work" that's what drives me crazy. I do home construction with him, But when it comes to "wives jobs" forget it. I've never expected him to pump my gas, put air in my tires, check my oil I can do all that if neccesary. It just boggles me why he won't help at home.

Quoting Anonymous 3: I'm a sahm. My dh will sometimes come home and cook dinner after being gone almost 12 hours. Or dishes. He started laundry while I was grocery shopping yesterday. We both have done the remodeling of the house. I hardly ever have to ask him to do anything. He even called me superwoman yesterday for getting all the grocery shopping done. I love my dh!

My ex dh was one of those who categorized women's and men's jobs. He refused to help bring in 200.00+ worth of groceries. He sat there and waited for his dinner while I put everything away. He wouldn't even separate laundry colors. It became really old. And that was when I was working and going to school.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 4, 2017 at 7:02 AM
When I was a stay at home mom I never expected him to help, although it would have been appriciated it was never required ...

Quoting Anonymous 4: I think if you’re working part time to help with finances he could lift a finger and help with house work. If he looks at cleaning and homemaking as your job, than financially supporting the family can be his job.
Mama2myBaBiEs
by Member on Dec. 4, 2017 at 7:21 AM
And that’s where he is giving you the short end of the stick now. He has the expectation of you doing everything because you only work part time..... he isn’t seeing that you are helping with finances so he could help with some household stuff. If he can’t be fair and doesn’t appreciate your side then screw helping him financially and go back to staying at home.

Quoting Anonymous 1: When I was a stay at home mom I never expected him to help, although it would have been appriciated it was never required ...

Quoting Anonymous 4: I think if you’re working part time to help with finances he could lift a finger and help with house work. If he looks at cleaning and homemaking as your job, than financially supporting the family can be his job.
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