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Does your husband help?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
I work part time.he works full time.I have always cleaned the house. Did laundry blah blah..normal mom stuff. He had a accident years ago so he can't do all the things he use to be able to do, I've started doing things for him I know he can do but I try to take some of the weight off so he doesn't get himself he hurt anynore. This includes moving furniture carrying in groceries taking out trash I litteraly do all the heavy stuff. I'm tired. Seriously. When ever he does anything around the house I help, whether it's being a gopher. Or physically helping. I help. Yesterday we had some light construction going on which made the house a mess, furniture needs moved back the whole house needs scrubbed.
I made a joke about hey, it would get done really fast if you helped clean up..you would have thought I asked him to build the Taj Mahal in a hour.. He then stated that I don't work 40 hours a week, I work part time, I should never need help cleaning...seriously?! This Sat with me all night and today until i brought it up, I said we both live here, I never ask for help cooking or cleaning, doing a laundry nothing..ever. I said I work 7 day a week picking up after everyone, it's ridiculous. I cook, clean, Do Wash, clean up after the animals,shop,and work. I did this all when I worked 40 hrs a week also. He just doesn't get it. I said it would be nice if someone offered to load the dishwasher, or throw in a load of wash. I don't ask anyone to mop or vacuum just simple easy things every once in awhile would be so nice. I know these are normal "mom" duties and I never said I dont mind doing them, but I hate that it's like that's all I'm worth because I don't work 40 hrs, that me working in the house is like my actual job to make up the other 20 hours...
Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 4, 2017 at 12:06 AM
Replies (31-34):
Emmyjoy88
by New Member on Dec. 5, 2017 at 3:02 PM
1 mom liked this
Wow. I'm spoiled! He comes home and gets a shower and pitches in.
I am a sahm. With 2 under 2 and another on the way. He wont let me lift laundry baskets that are full. He takes out the trash if i get it all together.
I wasn't feeling well and he did the dishes a couple said ago. Which 98% of the time when he come home they are done. He will vacuum if he sees it needs done or sweeps.
He will through in a load of laundry Its normally all separated.
He loves to cook so if supper isn't ready he helps me work together.
Changes diapers ( he says its his job when gets home). Then after supper he parts with the girls and we play games.
But I make sure he's in bed at a decent time so he gets good sleep. I put both girls to bed.
Our saying is( A family that works together is the one that stays together.)
Anonymous
by Anonymous 14 on Dec. 5, 2017 at 3:42 PM

My DH is domestically challenged, but he has no problem jumping in and helping so that at least things are easier or less chaotic for me.  Like when the kids were younger, he did bath time and story time while I cleaned up for the evening.  Or he would take the kids out for the afternoon so I could get stuff done in peace.  Now that the kids are older he will do stuff like pick up dinner if I say I am running behind, or run errands for me so I don't have to be in such a rush.  He also makes sure I get to sleep in on days we don't have to be up early, stuff like that.

So, while getting him to use a broom is a useless endeavor, he does step up a lot and provides much-appreciated help and support.  

He also works anywhere from 80-100 hours a week (with extensive travel), and I work about 40-50 hours from home.  So our situation is not typical anyways.

marickols
by New Member on Dec. 7, 2017 at 11:45 AM
Mine won't clean or do dishes. He will if I asked him one week in advance. And that's no guarantee that he will do it. I leaned 2 things, that you can't teach old dogs new tricks. And 2 to never raise my expectations too high when it comes to changing old behaviors that I myself created in the first place. Sometimes, I feel resentful for doing everything by myself when it comes to cleaning or doing dishes. But there are days that I tell him, I'm not cooking today and there's nothing he can do about it, Just order take outs if he wants to eat. It's harder when you have little ones but mine is 13 and he can fend for himself.
Linda_Runs
by Bronze Member on Dec. 7, 2017 at 12:05 PM

My husband is the same as yours.  He is an excellent cook and has always helped with our two girls.

We are spoiled compared to some others.

Quoting Emmyjoy88: Wow. I'm spoiled! He comes home and gets a shower and pitches in. I am a sahm. With 2 under 2 and another on the way. He wont let me lift laundry baskets that are full. He takes out the trash if i get it all together. I wasn't feeling well and he did the dishes a couple said ago. Which 98% of the time when he come home they are done. He will vacuum if he sees it needs done or sweeps. He will through in a load of laundry Its normally all separated. He loves to cook so if supper isn't ready he helps me work together. Changes diapers ( he says its his job when gets home). Then after supper he parts with the girls and we play games. But I make sure he's in bed at a decent time so he gets good sleep. I put both girls to bed. Our saying is( A family that works together is the one that stays together.)


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