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When will enough be enough?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
Hey ladies! Ok well I'm here to get let a little off my mind. I've been going thru so many emotions lately and I don't even know how to even feel half the time. I'm a mom of a wonderful five yr old little girl and I was just recently expecting after trying so long but lost the baby and one of my tubes due to an ectopic... I'm still hurt by it but not even that due to that I had to be out of work for two weeks so maybe me just being in the house so long is driving me crazy. I have no-one to talk to besides my dh but I mean come on...its just certain things us ladies would like to talk to female's about...i lost my mom at a super young age 3 months to be excate. so half the thing's a women should know and want to know I don't or never had that mother experience to try to feel good about things. I'm struggling and it's like a never ending battle even with a man.. he got laid of which everything depends basically on me I work part time and get paid every weeks...ues add that up...no Christmas at all for my dd. but I'm trying to find a way but it's hard rent is beyond late and it's like he don't care. I know what some of you may say leave but how when it was the other way around he was there 3 yrs ago. And i feel most ppl let money ruin relationships when that shouldn't be the main case but when the women is going thru a hard time find a way. I just wish I did have that motherly love because I feel it would different how idk but I do..her family don't care cause I'm blk and yes she was white and live in az I feel that should not have anything to do with a long lost niece or granddaughter. Yes my dad's alive he trys but only so much he can do when he married and has a selfish wife so I just don't bother...i stay home to my self in my little bubble and let my mind wander and it's getting to me. sometimes I just wish certain things but won't post because they always say becarful what you wish for.
Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 5, 2017 at 2:40 PM
Replies (11-17):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 10, 2017 at 9:12 PM
Thank you so much and yes I would love to talk.. you are right about being around positive ppl because I know that plays a major role. I just find it hard to open up to anyone about anything.but I do know that for WIC you can't receive once the child turns 5

Quoting Avidreader9559:
There is so much I want to say to you. I hear you saying that your heart is broken and life is difficult. I lost my mom at a young age, too. It was so hard having kids and having miscarriages and not having anyone to talk to about it. I learned from the doctors and nurses and asking lots of questions, but that doesn't make up for the longing for a close, motherly relationship and advice. Praying for you. If you would like to chat, I am available. I can share from what I have learned. 

I would suggest that you find a group of moms who are local so that you can have that adult time with other moms. Maybe a play group or a church group or a group that meets for coffee or story time at a library. It is hard to meet the demands of life when you are not being filled with positive interactions with others. 

I agree with some of the other moms. If you are having a hard time, there is assistance out there to help you out until you can get back on your feet. There are food stamps and WIC (Women, Infants, and Children). There may be local food banks who can help or churches in your area with outreach programs. You have a lot on your plate, and your body still needs time to heal from your ectopic pregnancy.  Praying that you find the resources and relationships you need during this time. Blessings.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 10, 2017 at 9:18 PM
Thank you! And no I'm not involved in any church or group but I sure won't mind it at all. In fact I was searching for one but I just get in place where I do get isolated and don't go anywhere but I do plan on trying again because lately I just feel that will be my only peace of mind.

Quoting Anonymous 5:

I feel the aching loneliness in your words and want to encourage you in any way I can. The loss of a mother/daughter relationship may stay forever etched on your heart, but there are still so many lovely caring people who you can lean on, or get support from. Are you involved at church? Many churches have moms groups, or support groups, or Bible studies, and things like that. I know you might feel hesitant to walk into a room full of strangers, but if the group is open to anyone, why not take advantage of it? Women who meet regularly tend to become comfortable with each other and friendships starts to bloom. Please don't remain isolated. That's when your mind goes in all the wrong directions. Stay connected and you will feel better.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 10, 2017 at 9:23 PM
My mom passed when I was 5 but I do understand where you are coming from thank you.

Quoting Muffet60:

I'm sorry for your pain and loss. You've received some beautiful and wonderful encouragement from other posts. And I also encourage you to find some support at church and other avenues. I lost my mom when I was 15 and every year that I live longer than her life span, I am so thankful. Thankful to be here for my kids so they won't be without a mother. You've already made it two years longer than your mother did, so that's wonderful for your daugher! Praying for a long happy life for you and your family!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 10, 2017 at 9:25 PM
I'm sorry to hear that... was you able to conceive a healthy after..cause I'm scared for when it's time again what are the chances?

Quoting hopalong47:

I had two ectopic pregnancies and I do understand your loss. As some of the ladies have said, reach out for the help you need...it will be temporary and that is what it is for. It WILL get better in time. God bless!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 10, 2017 at 9:27 PM
Yes he did apply for unemployment

Quoting Google_Me_Now: Can you volunteer somewhere?
Did or his he going for unemployment?
hopalong47
by on Dec. 11, 2017 at 10:06 AM

Here is what happened to me:

1972-ectopic pregnancy, fallopian tube ruptured and was removed. This was before ultrasounds and they had to operate on me, not really knowing why I was having bleeding and pain. My husband was in the Navy, so this was a military hospital where we did not know anyone.

1975-back to my home town...my doctor did a hysterosalpingogram and found that my other fallopian tube was partly blocked. He told me I might have been born this way, but I also could have had an infection that caused it...we will never know.

October 1975-we adopted our baby boy.

August 1978-we adopted our baby girl

Then I got pregnant and had a healthy baby girl in May 1980.

1983-had an early miscarriage...for no apparent reason.

1984-another ectopic pregnancy...fallopian tube ruptured and had to be removed.

I do know that if you have one ectopic pregnancy, you are at risk for another one, so do pay close attention to your body and make sure to check things out if you sense that something is not OK. Good luck and God bless!


Quoting Anonymous 1: I'm sorry to hear that... was you able to conceive a healthy after..cause I'm scared for when it's time again what are the chances?
Quoting hopalong47:

I had two ectopic pregnancies and I do understand your loss. As some of the ladies have said, reach out for the help you need...it will be temporary and that is what it is for. It WILL get better in time. God bless!


sewing

Avidreader9559
by on Dec. 11, 2017 at 11:37 PM

Please feel free to send me a private message whenever you need to talk. I would love chatting with you. I have a tendency to hold everything in, and I have learned that has a very negative effect on how I see everything. Maybe we can just start taking about whatever you are comfortable with. It doesn't have to big and important to start developing a friendship. Then maybe you will be comfortable when big things do need to be discussed. (((hugs)))

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