Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Would you? When and how??

Posted by on Jan. 15, 2018 at 2:20 PM
  • 26 Replies
Dealing with an outrageous preschooler, and I mean outrageous. Stealing, lying, blatant disobedience. No after no, 5+ temper tantrums a day... zero listening capabilities, he hears, he just chooses not to listen, ever.

I’m not one to advocate medication for children, unless it’s for a darn good reason... my boyfriend says he’s acting out and testing his limits. Which would be fine, if there was an end to such behavior. There’s been zero change in months, change in our approach of dealing but there’s been no change on this child’s behalf.

At what point or do I even say, hey maybe some sort of professional might help? I know kids go through stuff and testing boundaries but this is beyond anything I’ve ever seen, and I’ve worked with kids in multiple different situations for many years.

He’ll get kicked out of kindergarten if this is the way he attempts to start school next year...
by on Jan. 15, 2018 at 2:20 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
MixedCooke
by Bronze Member on Jan. 15, 2018 at 2:40 PM
1 mom liked this
Given that my daughter has autism, I go with my gut no matter the nay sayers and got her tested. No one wants a diagnosis but they do want to help their child.
ihave1
by Bronze Member on Jan. 15, 2018 at 2:43 PM
Have you actually tried to parent him? Putting him into outs? Things like that? If you say something, mean it.
Caitiejo86
by on Jan. 15, 2018 at 3:00 PM
I’ve attempted time outs, taking toys away, early bed times, scrubbing floors, talking to him.. I don’t know what I haven’t tried.

Quoting ihave1: Have you actually tried to parent him? Putting him into outs? Things like that? If you say something, mean it.
Caitiejo86
by on Jan. 15, 2018 at 3:00 PM
Right no one wants anything to be going on with their child, but I think if it would help them get through life a little easier...

Quoting MixedCooke: Given that my daughter has autism, I go with my gut no matter the nay sayers and got her tested. No one wants a diagnosis but they do want to help their child.
ihave1
by Bronze Member on Jan. 15, 2018 at 3:01 PM
You have to keep doing it and do t just stop. He knows he can do whatever he wants because you won’t punish him.

Quoting Caitiejo86: I’ve attempted time outs, taking toys away, early bed times, scrubbing floors, talking to him.. I don’t know what I haven’t tried.

Quoting ihave1: Have you actually tried to parent him? Putting him into outs? Things like that? If you say something, mean it.
Caitiejo86
by on Jan. 15, 2018 at 3:03 PM
I’ve always followed through. The problem is it’s like he doesn’t have any sort of long term though process. He’ll get in trouble for doing something and then an hour later, it’s the same thing. For instance, we took his bed gram away because that was his favorite place to go when he’d stolen food or anything for that matter. There was always some sort of evidence under his bed... bed frame is in the garage, so now he just hides crumbs and crap under his pillow.

Quoting ihave1: You have to keep doing it and do t just stop. He knows he can do whatever he wants because you won’t punish him.

Quoting Caitiejo86: I’ve attempted time outs, taking toys away, early bed times, scrubbing floors, talking to him.. I don’t know what I haven’t tried.

Quoting ihave1: Have you actually tried to parent him? Putting him into outs? Things like that? If you say something, mean it.
nattyleilani
by Member on Jan. 15, 2018 at 3:04 PM
1 mom liked this

I'd take him to the doctor, see about getting him evaluated by a psychiatrist. Sometimes, there ARE things wrong, especially at that age. Oppositional Defiant Disorder is one that comes to mind. Has there been any or a lot of upheaval in his little life? Are you his mom? If not, is his mom in the picture? 

ihave1
by Bronze Member on Jan. 15, 2018 at 3:06 PM
Keep at it. Also nothing wrong with getting him checked out.

Quoting Caitiejo86: I’ve always followed through. The problem is it’s like he doesn’t have any sort of long term though process. He’ll get in trouble for doing something and then an hour later, it’s the same thing. For instance, we took his bed gram away because that was his favorite place to go when he’d stolen food or anything for that matter. There was always some sort of evidence under his bed... bed frame is in the garage, so now he just hides crumbs and crap under his pillow.

Quoting ihave1: You have to keep doing it and do t just stop. He knows he can do whatever he wants because you won’t punish him.

Quoting Caitiejo86: I’ve attempted time outs, taking toys away, early bed times, scrubbing floors, talking to him.. I don’t know what I haven’t tried.

Quoting ihave1: Have you actually tried to parent him? Putting him into outs? Things like that? If you say something, mean it.
Caitiejo86
by on Jan. 15, 2018 at 3:06 PM
Mom isn’t in the picture, it’s very sporadic. So I get that he’s probably dealing with that in his sporadic.

Quoting nattyleilani:

I'd take him to the doctor, see about getting him evaluated by a psychiatrist. Sometimes, there ARE things wrong, especially at that age. Oppositional Defiant Disorder is one that comes to mind. Has there been any or a lot of upheaval in his little life? Are you his mom? If not, is his mom in the picture? 

nattyleilani
by Member on Jan. 15, 2018 at 3:10 PM

At 4, it's so tough. He can't express his feelings, and in all reality he DOESN'T know better. His dad needs to set ground rules with him, and his dad needs to follow through on punishments when he doesn't listen to you (it seems like you're his primary caregiver). Your boyfriend needs to be on your team and back you up. I think he should also be evaluated by a behavioral therapist, and they can give you really good ideas of how to help him.

Quoting Caitiejo86: Mom isn’t in the picture, it’s very sporadic. So I get that he’s probably dealing with that in his sporadic.
Quoting nattyleilani:

I'd take him to the doctor, see about getting him evaluated by a psychiatrist. Sometimes, there ARE things wrong, especially at that age. Oppositional Defiant Disorder is one that comes to mind. Has there been any or a lot of upheaval in his little life? Are you his mom? If not, is his mom in the picture? 


Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)