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Feeling guilty :(

Posted by on Feb. 5, 2014 at 8:23 PM
  • 16 Replies
I'm don't feel as connected with this baby as I have with my babies in the past. Don't get me wrong I'm super excited but I still can't believe it and feel like I'm waiting to find out the gender to be really excited. We decided to wait till we know what baby is to but anything so I don't know if that's why it what. I wish I knew why I felt this way but I don't I just have theories. My eldest was a miracle baby (was told I couldn't have kids) my youngest was 8yrs late and a total shock he was also my hubby's 1st. I feel so guilty! :(
by on Feb. 5, 2014 at 8:23 PM
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Replies (1-10):
ck8204
by Candie on Feb. 5, 2014 at 8:55 PM
I feel the exact same way. I was excited for my first, because he was my first. Then 8 years later (after battling infertility for 3 years) came my daughter. It was almost like having my first baby all over again, AND it really was hubby's first. This time I'm really struggling to connect. I have no idea why, there's no real reason for it. I'm hoping that once we find out the gender and can feel and see the baby moving regularly things will change.
spidermonkey090
by Sarah on Feb. 5, 2014 at 9:06 PM

i felt that way until i saw the baby in ultrasound

MamaNickelatti
by Silver Member on Feb. 5, 2014 at 9:13 PM
1 mom liked this
I've felt the same way with my second baby and this one. I ended up connecting around the end if the second trimester with my second and loved him the instant I pulled him out! You'll get there :)
NicLof2
by Nicole on Feb. 5, 2014 at 9:30 PM
That's the exact here too. I feel like once we know gender and start buying stuff it will feel real but it didn't take that with the last too. I was connected the moment we found out.

Quoting ck8204: I feel the exact same way. I was excited for my first, because he was my first. Then 8 years later (after battling infertility for 3 years) came my daughter. It was almost like having my first baby all over again, AND it really was hubby's first. This time I'm really struggling to connect. I have no idea why, there's no real reason for it. I'm hoping that once we find out the gender and can feel and see the baby moving regularly things will change.
NicLof2
by Nicole on Feb. 5, 2014 at 9:32 PM
I've already had 2 and I was so excited. Idk how to explain.

Quoting spidermonkey090:

i felt that way until i saw the baby in ultrasound

Pitap
by on Feb. 6, 2014 at 12:45 AM
1 mom liked this
I felt the same way I think because I have been so sick. Now that I've been able to actually eat and drink the last couple of days, I'm starting to feel a little more connected. It was just really hard to connect with a baby I felt was sucking the life force out of me.
ZPK
by Mandi on Feb. 6, 2014 at 12:52 AM
1 mom liked this

I feel that way too, and did my second pregnancy as well, until she was born. Then I was totally in love.

MixedCooke
by Gold Member on Feb. 6, 2014 at 1:00 AM
1 mom liked this

If you were told that you couldnt have kids then they all are miracle babies!  i dont feel connected to this one because I dont want to feel connected in case I miscarry again.  I even refused the ultrasound pics to take home.  At most, I will buy a gender neutral outfit to take the baby home in.  I may need a stroller because my current one has seen better days.  By caring for yourself and caring for your kids, the baby is still healthy and will hear you reading and singing to your other kids.  I didnt feel connected with my second one until 2 months after she was born and now she is a total Mommy's girl!  The bond is there whether you feel it right away or not.

OliviaLouise29
by Silver Member on Feb. 6, 2014 at 7:41 AM
1 mom liked this
I feel the same way. Just think it is because I am so busy with my other 2 I have less time to obsess over new baby
ele2837
by Erika on Feb. 6, 2014 at 8:54 AM
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I feel like that too, especially before the ultrasound. For about a week after the ultrasound I felt really connected, but I was laying in bed this morning thinking about how disconnected I feel. My husband was leaving for work and came and kissed me and then kissed my stomach. I was half asleep and thinking why in the world did he do that? Oh right, there is a baby in there. I'm hoping after we find out gender and I start feeling more movement I will feel more of a connection.
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