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Feeling insecure

Posted by on Jun. 4, 2017 at 5:30 PM
  • 5 Replies
I'm just feeling insecure, I'm not a skinny girl and I'm worried about gaining more weight with this pregnancy. I feel like my husband isn't attracted to me and feel like he looks at other women. Again it's me being insecure. I'm causing myself anxiety. It doesn't help that we are not allowed to do anything sexual by orders of my doctor. Ugh what's wrong with me?
by on Jun. 4, 2017 at 5:30 PM
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Replies (1-5):
DKH722
by Bronze Member on Jun. 4, 2017 at 8:36 PM
1 mom liked this
Hey girl! I am sorry you are feeling that way and I know from personal experience, exactly where you are. I am the heaviest I have ever been (not pregnant). And I wasn't comfortable at the weight I started this pregnancy at. My midwife wants me to keep my weight gain total at 15-20 lbs and I don't know how I am going to do it! My husband and I went through something at the beginning of my pregnancy involving another woman and it has killed my self esteem and caused me a lot of pain and despression. So, believe me, I understand where you are coming from...but I love pregnancy and I feel my most beautiful when pregnant, so I am just trying to take it all one day at a time. I have been trying to do my makeup more and get dressed up more even when I am not going anywhere..and just taking time to take care of me. It has been helping. And when it comes to your dh, maybe you guys could try some touching or oral stimulation that doesn't involve penetration? If not, cuddling, kissing, and spending time together can help fill that void without you having to risk your pregnancy. I hope things get better for you, hon!
island_latina
by Member on Jun. 5, 2017 at 2:54 AM
I'm so sorry you are going through that. I talked to my husband today and told him my feelings and insecurities and he was so reassuring and loving. I know a lot gas to do with my own self bullying and the pregnancy hormones aren't helping lol. The reason I'm so insecure is because my first pregnancy my husband was talking to other females, nothing sexually but was lying about our relationship and everything. He didn't even meet up with any one just talking. It made me so insecure, we went to marriage counseling 6 years ago for it and it helped a lot. He says it will never happen again but now that I'm pregnant I guess it brought up those memories and emotions. He really tries to show me that he won't ever do anything to hurt me again but I'm so used to men in my life including my dad to disappoint me. I need to just let it go and know if he did something then he made a conscious decision and knew what he would lose. I have to trust in him and God. It's just hard.

Quoting DKH722: Hey girl! I am sorry you are feeling that way and I know from personal experience, exactly where you are. I am the heaviest I have ever been (not pregnant). And I wasn't comfortable at the weight I started this pregnancy at. My midwife wants me to keep my weight gain total at 15-20 lbs and I don't know how I am going to do it! My husband and I went through something at the beginning of my pregnancy involving another woman and it has killed my self esteem and caused me a lot of pain and despression. So, believe me, I understand where you are coming from...but I love pregnancy and I feel my most beautiful when pregnant, so I am just trying to take it all one day at a time. I have been trying to do my makeup more and get dressed up more even when I am not going anywhere..and just taking time to take care of me. It has been helping. And when it comes to your dh, maybe you guys could try some touching or oral stimulation that doesn't involve penetration? If not, cuddling, kissing, and spending time together can help fill that void without you having to risk your pregnancy. I hope things get better for you, hon!
DKH722
by Bronze Member on Jun. 5, 2017 at 5:27 PM
Exactly, I am in the same place. My husband was talking to another girl and they were planning to hookup but I found out the day after he chickened out. I'm the only one he has ever been with and he told me that he was scared to be with someone else and scared to lose me. He seems sincere and says he knows he made a huge mistake. But it can be very hard to move past. I believe everyone deserves a second chance, though. And I do love him so much, i don't want to let my marriage fall apart. I think it will eventually make us stronger but right now we are both just trying to move forward and heal.

Quoting island_latina: I'm so sorry you are going through that. I talked to my husband today and told him my feelings and insecurities and he was so reassuring and loving. I know a lot gas to do with my own self bullying and the pregnancy hormones aren't helping lol. The reason I'm so insecure is because my first pregnancy my husband was talking to other females, nothing sexually but was lying about our relationship and everything. He didn't even meet up with any one just talking. It made me so insecure, we went to marriage counseling 6 years ago for it and it helped a lot. He says it will never happen again but now that I'm pregnant I guess it brought up those memories and emotions. He really tries to show me that he won't ever do anything to hurt me again but I'm so used to men in my life including my dad to disappoint me. I need to just let it go and know if he did something then he made a conscious decision and knew what he would lose. I have to trust in him and God. It's just hard.

Quoting DKH722: Hey girl! I am sorry you are feeling that way and I know from personal experience, exactly where you are. I am the heaviest I have ever been (not pregnant). And I wasn't comfortable at the weight I started this pregnancy at. My midwife wants me to keep my weight gain total at 15-20 lbs and I don't know how I am going to do it! My husband and I went through something at the beginning of my pregnancy involving another woman and it has killed my self esteem and caused me a lot of pain and despression. So, believe me, I understand where you are coming from...but I love pregnancy and I feel my most beautiful when pregnant, so I am just trying to take it all one day at a time. I have been trying to do my makeup more and get dressed up more even when I am not going anywhere..and just taking time to take care of me. It has been helping. And when it comes to your dh, maybe you guys could try some touching or oral stimulation that doesn't involve penetration? If not, cuddling, kissing, and spending time together can help fill that void without you having to risk your pregnancy. I hope things get better for you, hon!
GlitterInTheAir
by Bronze Member on Jun. 5, 2017 at 5:51 PM
1 mom liked this
I'm not a skinny girl either. According to my bmi im obese (such a crock of shit I'm a size 13/14) and I get the same way; but now that I'm starting to show I'm feeling better because he has a pregnancy kink lol
island_latina
by Member on Jun. 5, 2017 at 7:10 PM
Awww that's awesome. I'm a little bigger then you, I'm considered obese too.my husband was so reassuring yesterday. He even told me last night when we were laying in bed that he doesn't want me to ever feel that way or stress about it. It really made him sad.

Quoting GlitterInTheAir: I'm not a skinny girl either. According to my bmi im obese (such a crock of shit I'm a size 13/14) and I get the same way; but now that I'm starting to show I'm feeling better because he has a pregnancy kink lol
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