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Is discipline the true deciding factor?

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If you parent all of your children the same way, same expectations and consequences, how is it possible for them to turn out so differently?  Did you really not parent them the same?  I still only have the one, but we are trying for number two, and I was just talking with a parent about how their latest little one is a tantrum thrower that she can't stop.  She said everything that worked for her first two didn't for this one.  So what's the deal?  Is it all about discipline or are there are environmental factors at work?

by on Sep. 18, 2010 at 3:38 PM
Replies (11-12):
KLind771
by Member on Dec. 5, 2012 at 4:55 PM
1 mom liked this

There are so many factors that contribute to our difference.  Even with the same parents, our genetic makeup is different from that of our siblings. The way we look is just a small part of that.  Our age difference and the influence of our siblings. Another factor is expectations- i.e. a father's expectations for his son verses those for his daughter, for one athletically gifted or mentally gifted from those who are not, a larger child from a more frail one.  The influence of their teachers, friends and their friend's parents.  Our own aging and experience makes us different parents for each child at the same stage or age of development. One can see the list goes on and on and on.

mom_4_God
by Member on Oct. 16, 2013 at 2:38 PM
1 mom liked this

I feel that God gives each child their own free will; ultimately they make the choice on how they will be as grown-ups. Yes their upbringing, environment and so forth play an important role. I also feel that each child will specialize and develop personality niches within the family. One may be a budding artist, the other great in academics, and yet another the star on the football team.

As long as you through love and discipline have taught them right from wrong and good ethics and behavior skills then they will all probably turn out to be valuable citizens, each with their own unique personality

 

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